Thursday, November 29, 2007

Spring Awakening Giveaway

I posted on the Spring Awakening Fan Club message board that I have obtained one additional copy of the 2 full-page New York Times GAP ad featuring the entire original cast of Spring Awakening. I then went on to say that I am trying to find out a way to choose one lucky winner from the SA Fan Club. I have decided. There will be one trivia question. It is: Who bought me my Spring Awakening tickets for my birthday this year? The answer can be found somewhere on the World Wide Web. Those reading this post on my blog or in Facebook Notes are closer to finding the answer than they think...hint, hint. Send me a "Personal Message" on the Spring Awakening Fan Club site (my nickname is susqhb) and from the correct answers I will choose one winner. Good luck all!

Friday, November 16, 2007

Idiots in the News...

OJ OJ OJ. What can I say? Dude, you are a bad criminal so find a new line of work. He was indicted this week on his burglary charge in Las Vegas. His response? "Its alright. I trust our nation's jury system". Well sure you do. They acquited you of a murder that you have since admitted to. I would trust the jury system too if I was able to get away with murder, literally.

Other idiots. I had this story in my newsfeed today: Robber shoots himself during home invasion. During the robbery, one of the robbers went to put his gun in his pants and the gun went off and he shot himself. IN HIS PANTS. I'm not going to ask question. I'm going to use my imagination as to the connotations of shooting yourself in the pants. If you are stupid enough to stick a gun into your pants with the safety off, don't carry a fricken gun.

Embarassed in the city

Rarely do I have a life experience that is so embarrassing that I feel the need to write about it. But here goes...

So this week Tamar and I ran out to lunch and we had some time to kill so I suggested we go to Conway. Its bad enough that I shop there. Their clothes are kinda skanky and don't fit anyone over a size 4 but I still like to go there and pick up new tights every winter and shop for stuff from their store in the basement. Really cheap gifts, toys, toiletries, and food items. So Tamar was upstairs looking at their size 4 clothing items and I ran downstairs to see if they had any 99 cent boxes of cereal (I love Conway deals!). Tamar was hanging onto my credit card since my skirt didn't have a pocket. So before I went downstairs I reached into her purse and grabbed the card. I got down there, grabbed the cereal and went to pay. And I handed the non-English speaking cashier....Tamar's Baruch ID card. And she laughed at me. I apologized, asked her to hold on a sec and raced upstairs to get my credit card from Tamar to pay for my $5 worth of items. By the time I got downstairs apparently all the cashiers had heard the story and thought it was hysterical. To make matters worse, as Tamar and I were heading out of the store some babe who thought she was a security guard tried to make us show receipts. Oh, sure. Cause I really was at CONWAY to SHOPLIFT two pairs of $1.99 stockings and a box of 99 cent cereal. We asked her why she was checking receipts and I said, but you've never checked them before. She was all up in my grill and was like "Oh yeah! How long you been shopping here? We been doing this forever" How long have I been shopping at Conway? Thats a personal question. I don't think I want to admit that to another person. Especially this babe. Anyway, crisis averted. I'm adding Conway to my long list of NYC stores that I have been embarrassed in. Actually come to think of it, this was my second time making trouble at Conway. The first was when I brought a whole slew of Free Manischewitz manufacturer's coupons when I saw they were selling those gigantic bottles of grape juice. Those poor girls had never seen a coupon before. I had to explain to them how they worked. Anyway, Peace y'all.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Appropriate Mitch Quote

Tamar and I just got back from J2. The dude behind the counter just gave me the smallest slice of pizza I have ever seen. Which reminds me of a story Mitch Hedberg told: "I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the f#$%er gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the f#$%er gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!"

Video Delay

Sorry folks. My comedy video has not yet been uploaded. My computer is sick and is being fixed by my friend Adam. Keep waiting with baited breath. It will be posted as soon as possible. This is also sad because those of you who are my friends on Facebook are accustomed to see new Susanne pictures almost daily and I am a week behind. Soon soon.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Tonight's the night...

Susanne doing stand up...Take 2. Topic: Becoming Frum and Being a BT. Pictures, stories, and video to follow. Wish me luck. I hope I don't blow.