What is the definition?

I just finished watching on my DVR the 2006 Scripps National Spelling Bee. It was aired Live for the first time in Primetime on ABC. Last year I believe they showed the taped version on ESPN. People argued that it isn't a sport, but hell, I saw more sweat on these contestants than I did watching the Winter Olympic's Curling Finals. Anyway, forgetting that all these contestants were probably kids I would have made fun of in junior high, mostly because of my jealousy toward their gigantic brains, they really impressed me. But most surprising was the choice of the words used for these final rounds. The first one I found intriguing was knaidel. Yup, the dumpling my grandma used to put in her chicken soup. This word is derived from Hebrew.

A mere three words later the word gematrial came up. Certainly the contestant Kavya Shivashankar never learned advanced Gemara or he would have known that the correct spelling is also from Hebrew and not spelled gematriol.

Four words later Saryn Hooks came to the mic. Her word, are you ready for this, was hechsher. Hechsher is the formal granting of certification, usually by an authorized rabbi, that a product is certified as kosher. Are you f-ing kidding me?! Its a shame the Lubavitcher from South Carolina that was in this year's bee didn't make it to the final round. She would have had clear sailing. Saryn, my personal favorite, correctly spelled the word but the judges had it down as being spelled hechscher. With a sch at the end. So they dinged the little bell and the surprised Saryn dejectedly sat down with her folks. After the next commercial the head judge Mary Brooks made an annoucement that Saryn had in fact spelled the word correctly. Their sch spelling was a mistake. Phew! I felt like if I wasn't able to spell that word correctly I couldn't be an Orthodox Jew. Thank goodness they were mistaken and Saryn and I were both correct. 2 rounds and 17 words later the final Hebrew word made its appearance in the bee. The word was yizkor, the prayer or prayer service held in memory of the dead. This was easily handled by some Indian dude. Lets hear it for dictionary memorization!

The spelling bee was finally won by Kerry Close of New Jersey. A surprisingly non-nerdy girl. Her finally word was Ursprache. What the hell does that mean? I can't wait til next year. I have a feeling I'll be seeing many Chinese kids carrying around Hebrew prayerbooks boning for next year's bee. If they're smart at least they will...

Shavuous round up

This evening we finished celebrating the holiday of Shavuos. This is the holiday that God gave the Torah to the Jewish people. In the Torah is says that there was thunder and lightning on Mount Sinai when the Torah was given. Appropriately, Thursday night we experienced one of the most intense thunderstorms I've seen in a long time. And even more apropos, my synagogue is called Mount Sinai. Coincidence? I think not. The irony was not lost with me. One of the traditions on the holiday is to stay up late celebrating the receiving of the Torah the best way we know how. By learning Torah. I for one usually just celebrate by eating a traditional Shavuot chesecake, then reading a Jewish book, then spending the rest of the night in the bathroom because I'm lactose intolerant. This year I fortunately remembered my Lactaid. So not being bloated and the fact that I drank about 9 cups of coffee that day led to me being able to stay up all night learning. Our temple scheduled shuirim, or lectures, throughout the night. I only sat through one lecture before adjourning to a private room with three buddies LZ, AB, and DH, where we learned privately. I need to give these chicks props because when I thought I would go mad at around 3 am if I didn't go to sleep they convinced me that the earliest davening (praying time) was at 4:50 am and knew I could stick around another 2 hours. I went upstairs and was surprised to find quite a few people had stuck around to keep with the tradition of learning late into the night. There was even a few chicks still up there, including blog supporter ZK. I give mad props to all those people who were there for the 4:50 minyan and like me were the first to hear read the special section of the Torah that included the 10 Commandments. And then we all went home to pass out. I haven't stayed up all night since finals in college or paryting in high school. Aaaah, good times.

And God Laughed...

Ever feel like God is mad at you for something? For more on that, see Arona's blog.

Website of the day #1

I am inaguarating a new addition to my blog. Occassionally I come across a website that I find pretty funny or invigorating or educational and would like to share it with the world. Today I discovered www.patentlysilly.com. This dude puts up descriptions of patents that are pretty ridiculous. For example the patent that led me to the site was for a cordless jump rope. Yes, you read that correctly. A jump rope without the rope. You jump up and down while holding on to the handles. Now come on, I can jump up and down without the handles too and get a nice sweat going. Hope the dude didn't spend too much money creating that prototype. Nebbach.

What a week

This has been like the longest week ever. Thank goodness all events were happy occassions so I'm not minding the lack of sleep too much. Last I wrote was Tuesday when I saw the Dixie Chicks at the XM Satellite taping. Since then I've been listening to the new album nonstop. I usually have a lot of trouble getting comfortable with new albums. Only listening to one song that I like the most until I know it before moving on. On Taking the Long Way I'd say at least 5 of the 15 tracks are totally out of this world. And another 8 are totally fantastic. Only two songs, Lubbock or Leave It and Everybody Knows I can do without. The best are Taking the Long Way, Easy Silence (best of the best), Not Ready to Make Nice, Baby Hold On, and So Hard. What makes these 5 songs so outstanding is that they are explicitly personal. They deal directly with "the incident", challenges in parenting while keeping your marriage strong, and infertiliy, which both Emily and Martie have discussed their personal ordeals regarding. They are just awesome awesome songs. I can't get enough.

On Wednesday the Dixie Chicks were on the Howard Stern Show on Sirius Satellite radio. Now, I don't have Sirius but lets just say I heard Wednesday afternoon from my brother in California (and a heavy metal fan in high school) that he is now a big fan of the Dixie Chicks. Not neccessarily because of their musical accomplishments, but more for their ability to keep up a conversation with Howard. They talked about underwear preferences and sexual escapades. Sure its bathroom humor, but alas, humor that a majority of Americans can appreciate, myself included. Natalie is a big Howard fan which I'm sure helped them get the spot on the show. You can't hear the show unless you have Sirus but you can read a summary on Howard's site at http://www.howardstern.com/rundown.hs?d=1148540400. Beware though, I know a little bit too much about these girls now. Still love them though!

Thursday was my alma mater's graduation at Madison Square Garden. Since I work a couple blocks away and can't make donations to the school (yet) I figure I can make an appearence. Only know a couple graduates but I was mostly there to see some of my friends who had siblings graduating. Hung in the back with MGR and her kid Zip who finally is warming up to me. She usually just looks and me and cries. This time she was smacking me and laughing at me when I made fart sounds. Warning to parents, the only way I know how to entertain babies is with fart sounds. Just a heads up in case you were thinking of asking me to babysit. Also saw AK and SK and their tiny twin girls. So cute.

Friday morn. Woke at 5 am in order to make it by 6 to the Good Morning America Dixie Chicks concert. Last Tuesday I saw a tiny note on a Dixie Chicks press release saying that if you want VIP passes to shoot some ABC executive an email. I sent one with my name and info, then I sent another from my email with Destiny's name and info, then I IMed SP and told her to email the info as well. Destiny received a VIP confirmation. Shosh received a VIP confirmation. The chick at ABC is on my shitlist. Where was my VIP confirmation? She sucks. She better give me a spot at Kenny Chesney next week.

The Dixie Chicks were awesome. I was a hit in the crowd. I brought my iPod speaker and was blasting the album so we could all listen while we waited. The band finally came out followed by Natalie and Emily. I figured Martie was hiding after the world found out the things we did about her on Howard Wednesday morn. But she too came out soon after that. I couldn't help but scream bababooey a few times just for the hell of it. They rehearsed the songs they were going to be playing. They did Taking the Long Way, Not Ready to Make Nice, and Truth #2. They also rehearsed Lubbock or Leave It but that wasn't included in the live show. Only the big guitar ending of the song made it on GMA. They were awesome and the best part is we didn't have any jerk Dixie Chick haters in the crowd screaming at them.

Shabbat I spent in Crown Heights with my friend SW who had never been there before. When the sirens blasted signifying the 10 minute warning before the Sabbath began SW was dying. She thought it was the funniest thing ever. I had really nice meals at my buddy GPW's aunt Friday night and SW's buddy who she was in town for a visit on Shabbos day. Got a chance to visit ESS after which was nice.

Sunday Sunday Sunday. Sunday we had tickets to the Kenny Chesney concert in Hershey, PA. It was a super long drive but the time passed fairly fast, especially after we stopped for slushies and my bottle of scotch accidently poured itself into the cup. Whoopsie. How'd that happen? Dad, if you are reading this, I'm totally kidding. Everyone else, rock on! We finally got there at long long last. We entered the stadium as Sugarland was just finishing their first song. Jennifer was awesome of course but the sound people must have been stoned and the music was blaring so loud you could barely make out the lyrics. Kenny came on around 9 and played for almost 2 hours straight. To be honest, it wasn't the best concert of his I've been to. There were a bunch of songs I'd really expected to hear that he didn't sing. He didn't even sing "The Good Stuff". I mean come on dude. That's like his version of Tim's "Don't Take the Girl" and Tim never misses an opportunity to fit that crowd pleaser into his set list. I was fairly disappointed. Our seats were good. In the bleachers but directly to the side of the stage. We were far but for 30 bucks you can complain too much and we could see fine. When we left we wandered around the parking lot for at least 20 minutes trying to find our car. When we got to it the crowd leaving was not going anywhere. They had closed the exit to fight the traffic prob. My roommate MK soon to be MKR was out chatting it up with the security forces and convinced them to open up a different route so we could get out of there. She sweet talked them enough to do something, otherwise we'd probably still be sitting in that field right now. I was also handy as the driver. I don't know whats up with drivers outside of New York and LA. Can you believe they were all waiting in a single file line? I was like, are they crazy? I drove onto the gravel side of the road almost running down some post concert tailgaters in the process and quickly passed at least 50-60 cars. Destiny and I laughed as we passed cars with shouts of "WHAT THE F*%@!!!" and "HEY!!!" and "WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR AN HOUR!!". I screamed back at them, "YOU JUST WISHED YOU THOUGHT OF IT FIRST!!!" I got us back in good time (its easy when you are averaging 80 MPH on the highway). We only got lost twice, a new record for me.

Yesterday I went to a BBQ in West Hempstead at AK and SK's house. They were celebrating a bunch of different things. It was quite the challenging year for them but they now have two beautiful twin girls and everyone is happy and healthy. It was a seudah hodaah, or a festive meal of thanksgiving, thanking God for everything He has given them. Friends and family came from all over and it was awesome to be there for it. Of course, I was there for the free BBQ, but it had nice symbolism as well.

That was my crazy crazy week in a nutshell. Thanks for the support. Peace.

My date with the Dixie Chicks

Today was beyond beyond incredible. I got into my office and quickly emailed my boss to let him know I'd be out for a couple hours this afternoon and he asked me to come discuss it with him. I was scared shitless. I hate confrontation but my email said I'd make up all the time I was out beyond my lunch hour so I didn't have a clue what he was going to say. I think he was thinking I had a lunch date or an interview or anything. I kind of had a date. With the Dixie Chicks! I explained to him that I'd won a chance to meet with my mentors and that was it.

I got to the Time Warner Center for the show which wasn't in the Jazz center main room as I'd pictured. It was in the Education studio, a much smaller room, to my delight. Probably about 100 people total in the room including XM Sattelite Execs, photographers, and sound people, and 40 insane fans. One dude flew in from San Francisco upon hearing the news and we sat next to a mom and daughter from Knoxville. It was a really welcoming vibe. First the XM guy came in to explain everything. There was to be a moderator who would introduce the Dixie Chicks and ask a few questions and they would play some songs. Interspersed throughout the program, audience members were encouraged to get up and ask them questions. This was being taped for a national radio show! Of course I was going to take advantage of that! First I had to think of a question. I wanted to ask about the "Incident". In particular their thoughts about why they were getting so much flack while other musicians, Bruce Springsteen and Neil Young most recently, and dozens of Hollywood actors have affirmed their disproval of the US government. But when I reached the front of the line they still hadn't spoken about the "Incident" at all in the interview. I didn't want to be the one to start the topic so I asked something a little more harmless.

I was cool as a cucumber which is surprising considering how awesome of a moment this was. I stepped up to the mike and said in my best fake phone voice voice,

"Hi there, my name is Susanne and I'm from New York city. I moved here from Orange County, CA at 18 when your song Wide Open Spaces was a hit and I can't describe to you how much that song inspired me". They all nodded and smiled their happiness.

I didn't include the fact that I peeked at the set list on the moderators podium and saw that it was the next song they'd be singing. Nice little tie in if I do say so myself. It was true, not total fabrication. I remember emailing that song to all my high school friends the day before I left for college. The first verses say:

Who doesn't know what I'm talking about
Who's never left home, who's never struck out
To find a dream and a life of their own
A place in the clouds, a foundation of stone


Many precede and many will follow
A young girl's dream no longer hollow
It takes the shape of a place out west (or I like to interject, BACK EAST)
But what it holds for her, she hasn't yet guessed

Its such a beautiful song. I'm brought to tears whenever I hear it live. The question I asked them was, "In your latest video for 'Not Ready to Make Nice', which I LOVE by the way, there are some of what I believe are obvious references to The Crucible and the Witch Hunts. I looked around on some message boards and articles and never heard anything about what you guys say about it and I was hoping to get some of your thoughts on the video"

Martie told me she was impressed that people are picking up on that symbolism. Her mom is an English teacher and immediately caught that. Others are finding links between the Chicks and their war position. Natalie said some people actually asked them why her dress was shaped like the map of Iraq. She was like "what?!" Turns out if you hold up a picture of her billowing dress from the video and a map of Iraq they look to be the same shape. And the paint on their hands everyone asks if its supposed to be Middle East oil. They're like, no, its ink, like regarding bad press I guess. All three seemed very impressed by my question and answered everything I had wondered about. Its so cool when you admire someone to go right up to them and ask questions. It was such a cool experience.

Once I went back to my seat the moderator guy was talking about me. He was like, thats so fantastic that Susanne mentioned your song Wide Open Spaces. And just like Susanne said, so many young women were inspired by it. Or something like that. I was busy leaning over to Destiny saying, dude, the moderator keeps saying my name. It was so cool.

The set opened with Truth #2 from their Home album. Then they introduced two new songs, Taking the Long Way and Easy Silence. Both totally excellent! It was funny since a bunch of people were singing along and Natalie accused us of illegally downloading the music before it was released since it came out just that day. Then came Wide Open Spaces which was awesome. I honestly felt like they were singing it for me since I'd mentioned it a minute before. Natalie messed up a lyric in the last verse (I didn't notice, since like I mentioned I was totally crying from hearing her sing the song) and they had to repeat it. So I heard them play the song twice. I wanted her to mess up on all the songs after that so we could hear them play longer. Then they closed with Not Ready to Make Nice. This was awesome to see live because Natalie puts sooo much emotion into her lyrics. When she sings "I know you said, Can’t you just get over it, It turned my whole world around, And I kind of like it" She gets this coy smile on her face thats to die for. Like shes telling a story through her delivery. Not enough musicians can convey that.

After the show I rushed to get in line for a picture with them but they only allowed a few pics. I thrust my Time magazine with them on the cover through the throngs of people and got all three Dixie Chicks to sign the cover. I went right after work to get a frame for it. Its hanging right above my computer as I type this post. This is one of my most prized possesions now. I'd say its up there with my Granny's chai necklace that I was given the day of her funeral (and rarely take off) and the softball I have signed by Lisa Fernandez my favorite softball player that sits on my desk at work. These are things I can glance at and get great encouragement and inspiration from.

Next up on my country calendar is the Dixie Chicks performance on Good Morning America on Friday morning. I'll be the one wearing the cowboy hat looking all fired up! Then on Sunday (yay!) I bought tickets to see Kenny Chesney (my second favorite male singer after Tim McGraw) and Sugarland (my second favorite band after the Dixie Chicks, of course) in Hershey, PA. He is of course going to be playing Madison Square Garden next week, but its on Friday night, the Sabbath, and I won't be able to attend. Therefore I am trekking 3 hours each way to see him. Ahh, the things we do to honor God's commandments. I'm going with Destiny (of course) and my roommate Miriam. We were sitting watching Kenny Chesney perform on the ACM awards tonight, and I was like, wait, Miriam don't you have a car?..... And the plans rolled from there. Anyway, all this excitment makes me sleepy. Be sure to comment with your favorite Dixie Chicks song or lyric. Peace.

Presale

More on the concert later, but I wanted to share with the world...the Dixie Chicks Summer Concert Presale Code is..... t3RUzqPw2a

Copy and paste that code when ordering tickets on Ticketmaster.com. Can't buy them until June 5th if not and chances are they'll be sold out by then.

Good luck and hope to see you there!!!

In 12 hours...

12 hours from right now I'll iy"H be entering Jazz at Lincoln Center. Its not exactly Lincoln Center. More like 6 blocks shy and located near the top of the Time Warner Center at Columbus Circle. The view is exquisite. Like nothing I've seen in New York. I found it more beautiful than the top of the Empire State building. There are panaramic views of Central Park and the surrounding area. Not only that but I will be attending an intimate concert with my favorite musical group ever. According to my big brother Alan at my 3rd birthday, that group would be the Go-Gos. But no longer. I am going to be face to face with the Dixie Chicks! And I thought today was a great day...

Today went really well. I finally took care of some things I've been meaning to deal with for a while, so that was a huge weight lifted from my shoulders. Then as stated in my previous post, I was able to score tickets to an incredible concert with the man who first made me appreciate country music. I also emailed XM Satellite Radio who posted a blurb last week about a concert Tuesday afternoon in midtown Manhattan with 40 spots available for the first people email ticket requests. I never heard from them so I wanted a response. When I got home I made myself a big bowl of Honeycombs, the dinner of champions. Just as I was finishing my cell rang and caller ID showed a 202 area code. Who the hell was calling from DC I wondered. I answered and a woman said, "Hi Susanne, this is Jayme from XM Satellite Radio". I lost feeling in my legs. Thank goodness I was seated. She went on to tell me I had originally been wait listed for tomorrow's concert and thats why I wasn't contacted earlier. But because of cancellations I made the cut. I totally tried not to lose it but I think she totally heard my voice crack. But I did my best to play it cool. You'd be proud.

I am going to be in a room with 3 women that I totally unabashingly respect. They've gotten a lot of crap for what they now call the "Incident". On tour in London the lead singer Natalie Maines commented to the tens of thousands of attendees that they're "ashamed that the President is from Texas". Hell, I'm ashamed he's from the US but what can you do? This was on March 10, 2003. Ten days before the US invaded Iraq. These three women stated something that millions of Americans agree whole heartedly with. Yet they were chastised, their CD's were broken and set on fire bringing to memory images of the book burnings of years ago. Their hot single "Traveling Soldier" about a soldier killed in Vietnam fell off of the charts. How apropos, right? Today the President's approval ratings are in the 30 percentile. Or to translate, around 60-70% of all Americans basically feel the same as these three young mothers. They are also disappointed with the President. Myself included. The problem is, not all Americans are standing in front of a big microphone. Thank God we live in America. Home of the Free. Where everyone is blessed with the right to say and think anything they wish. Oh wait. Is that not true anymore? These women stood up and spoke their minds and were crapped on by tons of Americans. This doesn't change the fact that they are amongst the most incredible musicians I've ever heard or seen in concert. They could start going all kooky like Tom Cruise and I'd still buy their albums. And you know what, I think I just might mention it to them tomorrow in person. I am truly blessed. This was my best day in a long time. And tomorrow is going to kick its ass.

I'm the ultimate nerd

Becoming the ultimate nerd starts out small. First you have no friends answering your calls, your emails, your texts, or even your IMs. Okay, maybe thats not such a small thing, but bear with me. Then there comes a Sunday afternoon that you want to spend at the movies and you can't find a single friend to go with who is willing to sit through 2 or 3 movies. Hell at $10.50 nowadays, you need to get your monies worth. So on that cold December day you trek out to the movies for the first time all alone. I remember hiding in the back of the theater scared to death I'd run into someone I knew. I even formulated a story about where my mystery movie partner was in case someone asked. I heard phantom snickers and imagined everyone staring at me. Of course I was just coming to terms with my schizophrenia but so be it. Anyway, I got through that experience and realized that in New York, its a pretty common occurrence. All types of people go to the theater alone. True Nerds Unite! I'm now the expert solo moviegoer. I no longer have any shame. I'll bring my own microwave popcorn and pull the bag out of my backpack even before the lights dim and the previews begin. For some movies I even prefer to go alone. When I saw Rent I sang along to the music so loudly that I knew if I was with someone they would have died of embarrassment.

But today was a dark dark day for my self esteem. I was browsing Craigs List to help a friend find some theater tickets when I came across a guy selling 1 spare ticket for the concert of the year. Tim McGraw (and Faith Hill, blah) are coming to New York. For those of you unaware, Tim McGraw is a god in my book. I worship him. "I burn, I pine, I perish" for him. [Lucentio's line from The Taming of the Shrew Act I Scene 1] I am truly an obsessive fan. His picture is on the wall over my bed. I say hello to him every day. Of course his poster is next to Kenny Chesney but I like to let them fight over me. So when I realized I could not buy a ticket to the sold out show in NY I tried to formulate other ways of seeing the show. I discussed with DJ the prospect of buying tickets and attending the show in Hershey PA a mere 4 hour drive from NYC. Tickets to his shows are being scalped for upwards of $200. Thats nuts in my book. So when I saw that this dude had posted his extra ticket for face value I jumped at the opportuinty. I have in the past bought two tickets to country shows and found (or forced) a friend to go with me. But I realize all I do is stand up and sing the songs at the top of my lungs usually ignoring them, and the sneers from my surrounding concertgoers. I tend to annoy my companion. So who gives a crap. I have no shame. I survived my first movie experience, I can survive this. I'll admit, the idea of attending alone is embarrassing, but I'm willing to risk my street cred for an incredible evening alone (okay, within 100 yards of) my main man Tim McGraw. Wish me luck. Peace.

10 Reasons to Date a Softball Player

Found this on an old friend's MySpace page. A little grotesque, but to the point.

SofTbAll:

1. We AlwAyS uSe OuR hIpS fOr PoWeR..
2. We CaN hAnDlE tHe HeAt!
3. WhEn It GeTs HaRd We AlWaYs PuLl ThRoUgH
4. We MaKe SuRe We ToUcH eVeRy BaSe CaReFuLlY bEfOrE sCoRinG..
5. We CaN dO 9 dIfFeReNt PoSiTiOnS iN 75 mInUtEs.
6. We'Ll Go InTo ExtRa InNiNgS iF nEeDeD..
7. WeRe NoT afRaId To GeT dOwN aNd DiRtY
8. We'Ll Do AnYtHiNg To ScOrE
9. We DoNt MiNd DoInG iT wItH oThErS
10. We AlWaYs FiGhT bAcK wHeN bEhiNd In ThE gAmE

Mom's response

I'm home sick today in case anyone wants to bring me some chicken soup from KD for dinner. I'm really not doing good. Haven't felt this sick in a long time. Went to sleep with a sore throat and headache. Woke up with a sore throat and headache as well as the sniffles and some out of control sneezes. And then the coughing started. I think I'm dying.

In other news, I have 3 chicks coming to check out my apartment in 5 hours. The place is a mess with little bits of kleenex hanging out everywhere. No one is ever going to live here. I am going to have to my rent by myself which in case your wondering is more than I make each month. Like a lot more. Blame that on my love for non-profit work. Gratifying but Thank God I have a trust fund. Just kidding mom. I don't really have one. I like to joke.

In fact, I am so frugal with my money that my dad has told me in the past that I need to spend more money. Isn't he great? Usually in Daddy School (you know the place, its where they learn to avoid crying in front of the kids and how to give those stern talking to's) they learn to say just the opposite. "Do you have to go to the mall every week?", "Didn't you already buy a dress for your party?". My dad says, "Go out and treat yourself." He is a cool dude. I just think he hates my clothes. My dad read on my bro's MySpace page that my bro gets along with his parents "real well" as Alan puts it. Since Dad has told me this fact several times I just want him to know I dig him too. I like you too Mom, don't wanna leave you out. You know I'm a big fan! Mom just told me that she read my entire blog last night. This is what she does. She stays up all night on the computer until she falls asleep typing. So I asked her what she thought. She said, "Wow, I felt like I was reading The Diary of Susanne Goldstone". Don't worry Mom, no Nazis in this story. Baruch Hashem! Back to bed. Peace.

Phone Update

I just spent an hour entering all of your phone numbers into my new phone. Well, kind of new. I had those shmegegs at Verizon switch my number into my mom's old phone. After last week's debacle where they charged me 200 bucks for the same phone I already owned and is now living happily at the bottom of the Mt Sinai sewer grate, I vowed to find another Verizon phone so I could switch it over and get my 200 bucks back. I sent my mom to her Verizon store in Cali where she sweet talked her way to a new phone and mailed me her old one. All I had to do was clean off the lipstick marks and it was good as new. When I finally got to the front of the line this rather effeminate man told me I'd have to pay 20 bucks to switch over the phone. They never mentioned a fee during our fight last week in the Verizon store so I was super pissed off and totally told the dude off. But he still couldn't waive it. When I handed over the credit card the dude wasn't looking so I said "Sir" and immediately was embarrassed because this dude was more feminine than me. Hell he was more feminine then Reece Witherspoon in Legally Blond. Hey if sir was good enough for Peppermint Patty it should have been good enough for him. Either he didn't hear or doesn't respond to people calling him sir but he finally looked up and took the card to refund the 200 bucks back on to my card. Funny thing is he never had me sign a receipt for the 20 buck change fee so he either forgot or was scared for his life after I freaked out about the fee. Who knows. Anyhoo, I'm out of here. Peace.

Turf Sucks!

First off a shout out to JZ, ES's BF. Go Yankees! Win some games!

Alright. So last night I had a 6 pm softball game at City College/137th street (read: Upper Harlem). For those of you not anywhere on the east coast, we had some massive downpours the last couple days. I assumed our game would be cancelled but the league commissioner said that this field is astroturf so rain won't make it muddy. Course it won't....but it doesn't mean it didn't leave puddles all over the place. Wet turf is kinda like wet carpet, spongy and smells a little funny. It also means its verrryy slippery. This made for an interesting game. I, of course, was once again stellar! Game was scheduled to start at 6 pm. We finally began a few minutes after. Problem was two-fold. The next game on this field was scheduled for 7 pm leaving us less than 60 minutes of play time. And our umpire was a prick. He held the league softball rules closer than the Bible. When YR made a fabulous catch at first base, he called the batter stay safe at first because YR was fielding with a first baseman's mitt. Such crap. No warning, just a penalty. If a sport's umpire or referee doesn't check equipment before a game he should give a warning before screwing us over. So he made us have a super quick one hour softball game which is so unfair since we pay mucho money to play in the stupid league. Meanwhile across the way at the other field their umpire didn't call an end to their game after an hour. Like I said, this dude went by the book. It took me an hour to get to this field and there was no way in hell I was only playing for an hour. So I scoped out the next team playing on our field. They seemed to be missing a few players so I volunteered my exceptional skills and they happily let me join their game. It was a really nice group. One dude's name was Hung and another was Andres. Very different than my team which is all Yosefs and Noahs. We played a team called Rothstein Kass. I took bets that they were an accounting firm. I was right. Their girls sooo gave it away. I can spot an accountant from miles away. I like them. They itemize my bills for me. All in all I was fantastic. I was 5 for 6 hitting. Which added to my 3 for 4 last game gives me a .800 batting average!!! For those of you who don't know...that's really good. Hell a .300 average is really good! Its not that crazy when you think about it. This is slow pitch lob softball. If you aren't swinging for the fences you will get a hit everytime. Just need to dink it in there and never never hit a pop fly. Those are cursed in this league. Game highlights: 1) fighting with the umpire over the rules. 2) My homerun that turned into a double when I slipped going around first and fell on my face on this retarded field when the base decided to slide out of place as a made my turn. 3) My first stretch at first base when the base once again dislodged and I practically did the splits. It hurt. 4) The black Softball Rule Nazi umpire asking Yeshivish/Machmir definitely not Liberal, plays in a skirt and stockings DH for her number after the game. She says he wants her to play for his team. Um, yeah, I don't think thats what he has on his mind. 1830, you played good, but not that good. He thinks you're hot. He wants you. Peace.

As promised

This was written by me for my organization's upcoming newsletter that is distributed to synagogues and outreach organizations all over North America. Its basically a very personal account of my climb up the ladder towards greater Jewish observance. A lot of it is fluff since I haven't written a 1000 word essay since college (and also the fact that I never even applied to UCLA), but so be it. Enjoy and feel free to comment or email me with any questions. Take it easy and God Bless.

Susanne

People ask me all the time why I became religious, and, for the longest time, I didn't have an answer. Growing up, I had attended public school, played varsity sports and was even nominated for Prom Queen. As high school graduation approached, I told people that I had decided to attend Yeshiva University in New York, and they were flabbergasted. They asked all sorts of questions: Why hadn't I decided on UCLA or USC like most of my other friends? What is a yeshiva? Do you want to be a rabbi? I explained to them that I liked the idea of the co-curriculum that Yeshiva University offered. In addition to the Liberal Arts and Science classes that other colleges offer, Yeshiva U. required all students to take a full course load of secular subjects as well as classes in Judaic studies, Jewish history and philosophy, and the Hebrew language. To be honest, I liked the idea that these classes were required. It wasn't up to me whether on not to take a class. It was the rule.

My parents had made sure we knew our heritage. We attended a synagogue with a traditional Rabbi and were only sent to Jewish summer camps. We went to services on the High Holidays and my brothers and I had our Bar and Bat Mitzvahs at 13 -- mostly for the party and presents, but so be it. We happily ate my Granny's latkes every holiday, whether it was Chanukah, Passover, or Thanksgiving. We were, in my eyes, an ordinary Jewish American family. To me, going to temple, having a seder, dancing the horah at my Bat Mitzvah, were all physical things. I wasn't connected to the spirituality of these events.

The camp I attended every summer in Southern California was run by an Orthodox group. It was an interesting mix of kids -- half came from observant homes, the other half were public school kids just like me. As you can imagine, they infused a lot of Judaism into the camp day. Each morning started with prayer groups. The religious kids were given a prayer book and a chance to pray on their own. The rest of us would sit with a counselor singing Jewish songs and learning a few prayers. I remember being envious of the religious kids. I saw them swaying back and forth with their eyes closed murmuring things in Hebrew. I remember thinking, how cool is that! It was as if they were having their own little meeting with God. All I felt like I was doing was singing words to a tune. I wanted to know how to do what they were doing.

Being a typical preteen, when posed with the option of a Shabbat program with my youth group or a Saturday morning softball game, I chose softball. When offered an optional prayer class or a trip to the mall and the 7/11, I chose the Slurpee. I liked the idea of increasing my understanding of Jewish observance but could not be compelled enough to give up all the other things I enjoyed doing.

As it came time to choose a college, somewhere in my subconscious I realized it was time to make things happen. Two choices stood before me: UCLA with its active Hillel offering abundant classes on Jewish topics or Yeshiva University, where Jewish class attendance was not voluntary but expected of the entire student body. I was 18 years old and decided to opt out of the easy choice. Instead I chose to trek cross country to attend Stern College at Yeshiva University in New York City and begin my formal Jewish education. This choice changed my life.

While at the university, I attended all the beginner’s track Judaic studies classes. I took Beginner’s Hebrew, Beginner’s Bible (starting with Genesis, of course), and Beginner’s Jewish philosophy. The classes that interested me most, however, were those that taught how to lead a Jewish life. It was in these classes that I learned what it really means to believe in God, the significance of Jewish life cycle events, and the topic that forever intrigued me, how to pray. Classes on prayer brought back those memories of camp and how badly I wanted to daven like the other kids.

Not only did I learn how to pray and what to pray, but I learned why we pray. Prayer is sometimes referred to as service from the heart. It literally is an opportunity to have a meaningful conversation with God. We can praise Him for everything done for us. We can ask Him for the things we need, like good health and sustenance. And we can thank Him for always being there for us and listening to us when we need Him. Before I learned this, the only time I really prayed was while opening my report card or while stepping up to bat at my softball games. I finally understood the spirituality of it all. Its not just murmuring words. Its about feeling what you are saying and speaking from your heart, not just your head.

I’m not saying I’m perfect. No one is. Everyday I feel like I have the opportunity to do more with my life religiously and spiritually. I have taken my religious growth very slowly. I believe all Jews have a flame ready to burn brightly within them, and all they need is a spark to ignite it. I've seen people take on too much too quickly on their path towards observance. These individuals were not able to hold on to that spark. I started small, reciting blessings over food, going to synagogue on Shabbat, and most recently, reciting mincha, the afternoon prayers, every single day. Everyone is capable of being a good Jew. It takes just one act, one mitzvah, to get started. Go visit a friend that’s in the hospital. Make a commitment to learn Hebrew so you can follow along at services. Give to charity. Whatever it may be, it’s these little acts that help perfect the world and make living here a more peaceful experience.

It's coming....

Tomorrow I am planning to iy"H post my BT Manifesto. Hope you're ready for it.

Dad

This is a shout out to my newest reader. Lord knows how he found my MySpace page but I am happy that my dad Harvey enjoys my blog. He now calls me Rabbi Susanne. I love you dad! You rule!

Heights Safety

Local Man Murdered in Mugging - News

On May 2nd an 81 year old man in the community was beaten in the elvator of one of the local apt buildings and subsequently died of his injuries. It was 11 am on a Tuesday. I had lunch with SP that day and she had already gotten a call from her mom in Montreal about the incident. The older gentleman Jacob Gerstle was beloved in the Washington Heights. He headed the Breuer's Chevra Kadisha a highly respected position in a Jewish community. The assailant was a 6'7" homeless dude who has been tied to similiar crimes last summer on people who ranged in age from 69 to 84 years old.

Broad daylight? Beating up on old men? William Hill was arrested Friday night and will be tried for murder. I mean, come on man, its an old man. He probably had 50 bucks in his wallet. You could have grabbed it and ran. An 81 year old isn't going to chase a 24 year old twice his size. You didn't have to beat him in the face with your brass knuckles. I hope this bastard gets fried. Or even better, becomes someone's bitch in prison. Everyone needs to be vigilant. Its not rude to let the door slam behind you when someone is following you into your building. If it turns out to be your neighbor, blame your iPod. Say you didn't see them. If you are in an elevator with a dude and are spooked don't look down and ignore him. Look him in the eye. Get a real good look at him. Let him know that you could identify him in a line up if he pulls something on you. Even better (and this also works when you are staring down a pitcher, I used the move yesterday at my softball game and hit a double), smile at him. Let's take back the streets Washington Heights!!! Wow, that was a dramatic ending. Peace.

Oh Rachael

Shout out to my friend Rachael. She is going on a singles weekend and shes bringing 8 outfits for two days. I love the girl. Also mazel tov to her since her little bro was just chosen as valedictorian of YU. I love her. Even though shes Canadian. I won't hold it against her. This time.

I hate skirts

I hate skirts. This isn't a religious statement. Its a fashion statement. All clothing in my opinion should have pockets. You'll never see a pair of men's slacks without pockets. But many skirts, in particular, dressier skirts, never have pockets. Not to delve into modern day sexism or anything but I'm sure that it has something to do with the fact that men are supposed to carry around the money and therefore need pockets. But my uber-feminist ideas are not what I am trying to point out here. What I would like to do is complain that yesterday my skirt had no pockets.

So yesterday I had a totally packed day. In the morning there was a fistfight on my subway so the train waited in the station for like 20 minutes. They were paging the police to respond. This was the 59th street station. For those of you familiar, there is a NYPD substation in the upper level of this subway stop. After paging for 5 plus minutes two chubby bald cops came tottering down the stairs. It was like watching a cop satire unfolding in front of me. I felt like they should have been eating doughnuts and drinking coffee. Thank goodness is was just an argument and no one was lying down bleeding on the platform. The cops' response was ridiculously slow.

At lunch I had a hot lunch date (Shout out to SP) at Megabite the best pizza/anything else joint in NYC. Its on 38th and 6th ave. If you work within 20 blocks you should come here for lunch everyday!

At 6 pm I left for my softball practice in Central Park. Our coach/dude who sends out emails AD got us a choice field right off of the west side. For those of you who do not know, I now have long hair. I've never had long hair in my life so I am still trying to get used to it. So as I was trying to shag some popflys my hair was alllll over the place. I couldn't see crap! Luckily my friend JP let me borrow his hat so I wouldn't embarrass myself further with missed catches blamed on my hair. That doesn't reflect well on women using an excuse like that. After practice AD gave JS and I a ride back to the Heights which was great because I would have 20 minutes or so to eat some food before running to basketball. Okay, okay, I didn't hurry home to eat but to set my TiVo to tape the final episode of 7th Heaven. Shhh, I didn't watch how it ends yet. Hopefully not like Six Feet Under and its creeping death scene endings. Or Roseanne and her whole, it was just a dream sequence ending. Annoying much! Then I helped my roommate shlep our recylables to the basement where we encountered our neighbor/broker NS and his wife and daughter doing their laundry. We chatted for a little bit and then a ran to basketball.

Just a reminder, I hate skirts. I was jogging to Mt. Sinai where we play basketball on Monday nights. I shoved my keys and cell phone in the loose pocket of my zip sweatshirt. We have been having trouble getting a minyan for basketball the past month or so. Only about 3 of 4 chicks show and we give up and go home. So I knew if I didn't come, even though I was tired, hungry, and sore, I would feel bad if they were one short from being able to play a real game. So I was sprinting (yes I can sprint, I'm pretty fast too!) down 187th street and nearing the corner of Bennett. All of a sudden, as if in slow motion, my beloved cell phone flew from my stupid sweatshirt pocket and skidded down the street. It was like out of a war film. I screamed NNNnOOOooooo!!! It came to stop teetering over the edge of the curb and then fell to its death in the sewer below. I sat on the curb in front of my synagogue quietly weeping, mourning the death of my friend. Actually thinking more in terms of, I am such a bonehead. Now everytime I walk to shul I'm going to think, I am such a moron, I dropped my phone down the sewer. There goes all my kavanna. Then my buddy/expert chef LZ came by on her way to bball. She wanted to know why I was lying down in the street. I told her and we tried to see it but could not. The battery had fallen out so calling it did not cause it to light up. We considered all the options. I asked to borrow LZ's cell so I could let my mom know what happened. As she was handing it over she saw I was sitting on top of the sewer grate and for some reason became reluctant to hand it over. Wonder why? Anyway, LZ ran to ZK and TI's apt to grab a flashlight. We shined the flashlight into the sewer and saw it about 5 feet down covered in slime and a rat was trying to dial his cousin Rizzo the Rat from the hit movie Muppets Take Manahattan (shout out to Nili). After a couple other failed attempts to find emergency recovery tools (including LZ's attempt at flirting with a firefighter AND the shul super) we gave up and went home. I'm leaving now to visit the dingbats at Verizon to get a new phone. I'm happy to help the rat reconnect with his long lost relatives. I hear Tatooey the Rat and Yolanda Rat are also in town.

Moral of the story, skirts suck. If I had a pocket this never would have happened. If you would like me to have your phone number please shoot me an email with your info so I can put it in my new phone. If you don't know my email check the guide. Thanks to those of you that offered to call Brad Pitt for me to cancel our lunch date. I can't believe that two timer is prancing around Africa with that tramp Angelina. Humph! Peace!

BREAKING NEWS!!! BREAKING NEWS!!!
It is now 3:30 pm on Monday and I wanted to add an addendum to the post about my phone. I will be sitting shiva tonight for my phone at the sewer grate next to the YU van stop at 187th and Bennett Ave directly across from Mt. Sinai. On a more serious note, I went to Verizon today to get my new phone. I was informed that I am still a couple months shy of my phone upgrade and since I don't have insurance (because insurance is for suckers!) I was stuck spending $200 to get the same damn phone thats sitting at the bottom of the sewer. Being a penny pincher that doesn't make any money, I started tearing up in Verizon. Like seriously I was about to start bawling. At first I was all optimistic that I'd get a better phone and the only thing lost would be the numbers, which since my friends are totally awesome, I already got emails with lists of peoples numbers. Now I'm 200 bucks down the sewer drain that could have gone toward my next iPod. I am sad now. But they said that if I find a compatible Verizon phone and I bring it in I can return this phone and get a complete refund. Thank goodness. I can pay rent for another month. Phew! If you or anyone you know has seen a phone such as the one described please inform the local authorities. Or just give it to me so I can get my 200 bucks back. Thanks!

You can call me Rabbi Susanne

Well I guess it makes sense. My friends that are accountants I expect to go through our restaurant bills and itemize who owes what. My lawyer friends I ask all my legal questions to, like can I build a pool on the roof of my apartment building (they tell me thats not a legal question...and I'm an idiot). So it makes perfect sense that my friends ask me all of their religious questions. After all, I work with Rabbis. Keep in mind, I'm not referring to my friends who aren't Jewish. I'm not even referring to my Jewish friends who aren't religious. I'm talking about the Super Jews! The ones who are way more observant then myself. Yesterday Devo asked me whether or not Haagan Dazs is kosher. Hell, if it wasn't I'd probably still eat there, its that good. J/k. But the point is I'm a Rabbi by association. I actually gave her a very Rabbinic answer too! How cool am I. I said "well all the ice cream is kosher, individual franchises aren't under an umbrella kosher organiziation because of equipment and toppings and what not. But in my opnion, everything is cold, so even if the scooper touched something questionable, its fine. Just avoid toppings that you don't recognize and check for kosher symbols on cones." Where the HELL did I pull that from?

Then today my fellow blog master IMed me:

Elana: i have a jew quesiton
me: hit me
Elana: I had potato chips and I just realized they be dairy
me: oooohh, chips
Elana: but now I want to eat my salad which contains chicken
what should I do?
me: ok, how long ago did you eat them
and how long do you genereally wait between?
Elana: i finished em like two min ago and I washed my mouth with water and I am eating celery now
i dont have a waiting time this never happens to me
me: well for me, im good to go after drinking some thing (not milk of course ) and then waiting a couple minutes. eating pareve between is helpful
elana: is there a rule?
me: its really really a minhag (custom) issue i think
i remember learning at chabad camp that you must wait 3 hours between dairy and meat. but they're psycho hard core.
Elana: thanks

How about that. I have totally become a Rabbi. Just gotta enroll in a Corny Joke Telling class and I'll be all set. Have a Shabbat Shalom!

My Right Foot (I could win an Oscar)

Flip Flops. No I'm not talking about what the Bush campaign accused John Kerry of doing. I'm talking about the kind you wear on your feet. Today is my first day wearing my black Old Navy flip flops. I will wear them all summer long starting today. Yay! Although, there is some bad news. When I was home for Passover I burnt my right foot. Yes, just my right foot. I thought I sunscreened up really good. Was sitting on the beach with my copy of the Da Vinci Code while my right foot unknowingly burnt to a crisp. When I got home I saw it was all red and was like, crap, I burnt my right foot. I hadn't thought about it again until today when I looked down at my feet to admire my flip flops and noticed that my right foot is 100 times tanner then my left. I look like freak. This sucks! Oh well. Peace.

Summer in New York

It's that time again. Today its supposed to be 75 degrees. Summer weather in New York are unbearable. Seriously, hot in California is tolerable. Here its almost hard to breathe. The humidity makes you feel like you're sitting in a sauna all day long. I was on the subway this morning and started to shvitz like crazy. Sweated off my makeup in a matter of seconds. I need to start carrying one of those electric fans from the 99 cent store. You know, the ones that include the 2 AA batteries in the purchase. Quite the deal if you ask me. When I use it on the subway everyone looks at me like I'm nuts. But you know what, at least I'm cool. They can kiss my butt. But on the upside NY becomes a totally different place. Hundreds of people will congregate in Bryant Park which is situated behind the NY Library (thats where Jake Gyllenhaal stayed in Day After Tomorrow until his dad Dennis Quaid came to save him). I'm going to sit in the park at lunch today and work on my tan with a few hundred other New Yorkers. Bryant Park has become an awesome awesome place. They are the only public park in the city that sold it's soul to sponsors. I dig that about it. HBO hosts its Movie in the Park during the summer where they show classic movies under the stars. Last year we saw The Way We Were. I still don't know how Barbra Streisand scored Robert Redford. That was just bizarre. K-Lite FM (or one of those easy listening stations) hosts Broadway in the Park. Almost all the current hit musicals on Broadway do a performance sometime in the summer during lunchtime (Wicked is always the best, of course). Also, Good Morning America does their Summer Concert Series in the park. I plan to be front row center when the Dixie Chicks will be there on May 26! 4 Weeks baby! And then my boy Kenny Chesney will be there two weeks later. I am sooo fired up. Anyhoo, thats summer in New York. Come visit. Peace.

I love softball!

So last night was my first softball game of the year with my new co-ed team the Bearcats. We are so named because the founding members attended SUNY Binghamton whose mascot is of course the Bearcat. It seems like an odd trans-species creation, but who am I to judge. My college basketball team was called the Lady Maccabbees for goodness sake. If my understanding of the history of the Chanukah story serves me, there was no such thing as a Lady Maccabbee. Chicks probably didn't fight in Judah Maccabbee's army. But anyhoo, our game last night was on Roosevelt Island off the east side of Manhattan. Its gorgeous there. Looks like a big college campus with incredible views of the city and the Costco in Queens. The team is really nice. No one is a hardass or anything. Everyone seemed to have a fair temper and pretty good skills. And the best part is, we are all religious Jews! I think we should change from the Bearcats to the God Squad or Jew Crew or Yidden or something else of that nature. Theres like 6 people on the team from my hood in Washington Heights and the rest mostly live on the Upper West Side. This was great because we all were able to get lifts at least into the city to catch a train uptown. This saved us the hefty return commute. Considering we had never played together before and a majority of us haven't thrown a ball in a year or more, we did pretty damn good. We did lose the game but the score was 10-14. I didn't know Jewish boys knew how to hit. Our offense was pretty good. I don't think we have big holes there. Our defense was sloppy, but thats something we can clean up with a little bit of practice. Being on a co-ed team, three women must be on the field at all times which I love because I never have to sit out an inning. Yay! I played a couple innings in the outfield but soon moved to my best position at first base where I had a bunch of put outs. But my batting was what I was proudest of. Especially considering I haven't hit in forever! The coach dude Avi had me batting clean up (heehee) and I didn't let them down. I had 3 hits for 3 at-bats and had 5 RBIs and 2 runs scored. I felt like I was back in my junior year of high school when I was First Team All-League. Only because they needed to choose someone from every team and my team was shit but my batting average was .450! I am a rockstar! Anyway, can't wait for our next game. This is a really great group and I'm looking forward to some more good times!

World Series of Pop Culture

So yesterday my friends Sara R and Avi Z and myself went to a taping of the World Series of Pop Culture. I had tried out for the show last month with my new friends Judah and Elana and we did not pass the entry exams. You were graded as a team so everyone had to do well. All I know is, I'm not the one that blew it. I kicked ass on that test. So I needed to attend the taping to prove to myself that I was better than all the contestants that made the show. The answer was an overwhelming yes. Yes, I am the Queen of Pop Culture. Useless Knowledge is my middle name. Other than the categories that are admittedly my weak points (shall we say, any music category that doesn't have to do with Country) I aced almost all the other questions. Even categories that I didn't think I'd excel in, like Seinfeld, I got all but one correct. The contestant didn't even know the name of the restaurant that is featured in every single episode (it's Monk's by the way). The to top it all off, the team we really really liked, the Boeghy Bunch from LA (Jim! He is The MAN!!!) made it to the finals with this totally annoying and inept team from Atlanta. Jim was the LA team's strongest player by FAR and he was knocked out in the second round because of a music category that was about song lyrics. All of the questions that the other team was given were soooo easy ("It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife" Shit my mom, even knows that one.) where Jim's questions were like "He hung himself with a guitar string. A slab of turkey-neck and it’s hangin’ from a pigeon wing" How the hell did he know that one!! It's from Loser by Beck. Like I said, Jim is the MAN! But he still didn't win the best of 10 and was knocked out of the game. With only one contestant left on the Boeghy Bunch, Jason Boegh himself stepped up to the mike as did frilly blond from Atlanta. I don't even remember their question because I was so pissed Jim wasn't in the game anymore. Jim (a Vince Vaugh impersonator if you ask me) proposed to his girlfriend and teammate Amanda the evening before atop the Empire State Building. Now that's classy. That only made him more awesome in my book. He probably quoted to her every single movie with scenes atop the Empire State Building (An Affair to Remember, Sleepless in Seattle, King Kong, etc etc). Needless to say, without Jim the Boeghy Bunch lost to the annoying Atlanta team and lost the $250,000 prize made possible by Altel Wireless, or something like that. Towards the end of the taping I developed a searing headache and asked a chick behind me for some headache pills. She gave me one Ibpropren. Who on earth only takes one of these things? A beggar can't be a chooser so I popped the pill and shut up. Afterward we stopped at Duane Reade to buy more headache pills. Even with a blinding headache I still fought with the cashier and then the manager that the wrong price was rung up on the register. Hell, I picked out the one on sale on purpose. Wasn't going to get ripped off. Then we headed to Estihana to get some dinner since our 3 hour taping turned into 5 and we were beyond starved. I realized it was getting late to daven mincha so I quickly davened in the doorway of the restaurant (or as quickly as I can daven with an all Hebrew Mincha/Maariv prayerbook.) Afterwards my headache turned into a full scale nausea attack. I almost puked in my Paradise Chicken. The last time I felt like this, aside from being hungover of course, was when we had that huge Israel rally in my senior year of college where like a million yids marched on Washington. It was 100% humidity and then when we got back on the bus we realized our A/C was broken. And then the bus broke down. So we spent 8 hours in the oven of a bus and like 80% of us had headaches, and fevers, and were puking all night long. Needless to say, I didn't make it to my 10 am class on Monday morning. Not that I ever did though. :) Anyway, that was my Sunday. Thank goodness I feel better today because I've got my first softball game with my new team tonight and I'm super fired up. Will let you know how it goes. Peace!

Again? Really?!

So, guess who was yelled at on the subway last night? Well, officially it was my friend Avi Z, but I was the loud one in the conversation. Some old man, with hearing aids for goodness sake, asked Avi to keep the decibel level down. He actually said that, can you believe it? Who talks like that. But unlike the other day two women came to our defense. Avi was all apologetic and this lady sitting between me and the complainer was like, oh son, you don't need to apologize, this is the damn subway, you're allowed to talk loud. I told her, oh, he's a good ole boy from midwest, hes not going fight with the guy. So she and some other lady complained to the old man on our behalf. As the guy got off the train he thanked Avi who had in fact lowered his voice. Go Avi! The Chicago Boy with Good Manners!

My Subway Fight

***Once again dedicated to my only reader, Zehava. If you read my blog and your name is not Zehava, leave a damn comment. A comment that is not about Viagra. I get enough of those already***

Current mood: annoyed
I got in a fist fight on the subway. Okay, maybe not a fist fight per say, but I did get into a loud argument with some bitch on the A train. I have a loud voice. I don't know if I'm hard of hearing or if its because I spend my days on the phone with old people who I need to yell into the receiver for them to hear, but I'm loud, I admit it. Yesterday I ran into my friend Estie on the A train platform at 59th street so we were chatting. When the train came it was standing room only so we held onto the bars are the train barrelled along. I know some of you have never been on the subway, so I'll fill you in, they are loud machines. We were standing about 2 feet apart so we wouldn't a) bump heads when the train bounced around, and b) so it wouldn't look like we were involved in a romantic conversation. We were just chatting about how Passover was and other stuff. Then this Bitch with short red hair is waving to get my attention from about 15 feet away. I figured maybe I dropped something so I was like, Hi. She starts motioning for me to lower my voice and shhhhing me. Are you f-ing kidding me?? We are on the subway! Every morning I'm on the train with this dude that screams all this stuff about Jesus and the New Testament. In English and then Again in Spanish! Telling me I'm going to hell because I haven't accepted Jesus as my savior. Do I hush him? Hell no. I let some 6'10" black dude do it for me. Would she hush him? Probably and then she'd get her ass kicked. She was like, turn your headphones off or something. I was like, they are turned off, I'm talking to a friend. Then she tried to lecture me about how rude I'm being. I'm like me? Rude? I'm not the stranger on the train (who is sitting while we are standing btw) who interupted a private conversation to satify herself. And it wasn't even like we were standing on top of her, she was like I said 15 feet away, she had to raise her voice to talk to me. I was like whatever and ignored her. I tried to lower my voice for the rest of our ride together but when she was getting off, she told me I was Fucking Rude! I was like "excuse me?! What if I had a hearing problem or something? You'd be pretty embarrased huh? And as for rude? Who just shouted the F word on a crowded subway train? Go Screw Yourself!" And she got off. I win. Next time I'm gonna punch her in the face!

10 Hours of CNN

You ever watch 10 straight hours of CNN? Well I did and it sucks! Quick segue to explain myself. I'm a fairly observant Jew. For most people Passover means they eat matzah for a day or two and have a Seder where they recount the story of the Exodus. For religious people like myself, we celebrate this week long holiday by strictly avoiding most food and drink. In addition, the first and last two days of the week are extra holy. For instance, I prayed three times a day, didn't drive in a car, didn't use anything electronic (i.e. my computer) and didn't watch TV. Okay, okay, I watched TV, I just didn't have control of the remote control. Here's where I rant about CNN. This year for the first time, I spent Passover solely at my parent's home in Huntington Beach. My parents are not as religious as myself. They kept a strict diet of matzah (for the first 4 days at least, nice work guys!) but didn't adhere to the additional things like not working, driving, or watching TV. I wouldn't have watched TV, except that the big comfy leather couches and best lighting are located in the TV room. My goal was to spend the week reading the Da Vinci Code (for the second time, to prep for the movie). My mom's goal was to spend her days and nights, in addition to her daily cleaning, laundry, and bill paying (don't get me wrong, she works her ass off in the house), watching only shit I have no interest in watching. The only channels she watches are: CNN, the Weather Channel, the Home Shopping Network, QVC, and those ridiculous afternoon Judge shows. I swear, if I see another Diamonique bracelet I just might barf. I honestly think she was working with God to punish me for watching TV on the holy days. Why couldn't my Dad be around all day? All he watches is COPS and That '70s Show reruns. That I would have been able to handle. One day my Mom left CNN on when she ran to the bank. Did you know that CNN runs on a fricken loop every like 20 minutes. And it wasn't even a big news day. I must of seen the story about the Duke lacrosse scandal 100 times. Literally! The next day she left for the office and left the TV on the Weather Channel. They are even worse! They repeat their stories every 10 MINUTES! Can you believe that? So heres my question. How the HELL do these crappy cable channels get advertising monies? All they do is record 20 minutes of material and go "It's time for my 10 hour break". If anyone knows how I can apply for a job at one of these stations, please don't hesitate to let me know. I love break time. Peace out. More on my Passover and my sunburn at a later time. Shabbat Shalom!

TiVo ME Friday Night!

Don't forget to set up your TiVo for the Tim McGraw special on Friday night. I was at that performance with maybe 200 other people and was in the front row, so hopefully I'll be pretty visible. I'm the one screaming along to all his songs and making comments about his butt. You hear a butt comment, thats me. Also, during the song "Back When" (one of the last songs), there just might be a shot of me and two other chicks singing along. I have the big cowboy hat on. And I'm the one who actually knew the words. So go me! You can view a video I took of the concert below. Its a cheap camera so no sound, but you get the point. Enjoy!
Sus


Get this video and more at MySpace.com

You kidding me?

This is ridiculous, its fricken April and SNOW is coming down in fricken buckets outside. My corner office has windows everywhere and its like staring at the computer screen on the Matrix. Making me nauseus. Well, thank goodness, less then a week from now I'll be sitting on the beach in Cali burning my sensitive Northeastern skin. Coming home for Passover. Come visit. I'll give you matzah!
Sus

Leprecauns? In Alabama?

I don't usually find myself reading the Arts section of the Times (usually I use it as a placemat), but today I came across a doozy of a story.

Finally, my brother is cool.

My brother (no not Alan) lives in the same neighborhood as the The Real Housewives of Orange County! I think he should date the single chick. Anyone know if shes Jewish? J/K. Best show quote so far, "I just love botox!" Best fact so far, 85% of the women there have implants. And to think, until now I wondered why a single guy would wanna live there. This show rules! Good luck Brian!

Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll

So it was recently brought to my attention that I do indeed have a blog reader. One to be exact. My big brother Alan. So you know what this means folks...no more talking about sex. No more talking about drugs. That leaves me only one topic to comfortably discuss: Rock and Roll! Now that my brother has left this blog post to search for my sex and drug comments, lets get down to it. The state of rock and roll these days is horrendous. Now I love country music like any other good California girl who spent her high school days listening to KZLA. But that doesn't mean I don't dig some good rock and roll. One of my favorites I got to see live last Saturday night at the Orange County New Year's Eve party, aptly titled the Orange Drop. When we got there at 9:30 and spent an hour in the bar line I was itching to get outside and watch Joan Jett and the Blackhearts. Now this woman IS rock and roll. In fact, her most popular song is "I Love Rock and Roll". When I see the opening credits on my first season of Freaks and Geeks DVD, I rarely fast forward since Joan's awesome song "Bad Reputation" is blaring out of my TV. But these new "IT" bands like All-American Rejects and Fall Out Boy, among too many others, just do not do it for me. They hit you with some decent guitar licks and a good drum beat but they have lead singers that can barely hold a note. Thats good music? Well, I guess so. Kids now are scarfing up their albums at KMart or iTunes or downloading them illegally on one of the other sites. I don't get it. I think Kurt Cobain is turning over in his grave as we speak. Don't worry Kurt. I'm not buying.

Butt Rash

So as promised, heres my story of my ER visit. People might ask me, aren't you embarrassed to tell this story, and I say no, hell, its not like anyone actually reads my blog. So my eye doctor brother thinks he is a real doctor. In California optometrists have earned themselves the right to write prescriptions for things other than eye drops. Everywhere else in the world they still are unable. For good reason. Last week I developed an eye infection. I told me dad about it (hes also an eye doc) and he said talk to Alan, he knows more about medicines than I. Reason being, up until a few years ago they weren't able to give meds. Now that they can my brother tries to write prescriptions for things with obviously nothing to do with the eye. Like cough syrup with codeine. A Level 1 narcotic. Thank goodness the pharmacist was like, um, you're an eye doctor, you don't get to prescribe this stuff...especially for yourself. So after thinking long and hard about my situation, my bro wrote me an Rx for some sort of Amoxicillin product. It wasn't til two days later that I developed the rash..... on my butt! Realizing that the medicine caused the rash kinda freaked me out and I decided to go to my doctor in the beginning of the week. But no such luck, there was a transit strike. So I decided to do the next best thing. Tuesday morning I called in sick to work, not like it was humanly possible to sick on my butt rash for 8 straight hours in front of a desk. I walked down to Columbia Pres Hospital and stepped up to the triage nurse and got ready to tell her my problem when a line of people developed out of nowhere to listen in on my ailment.
Me: "So I think I am having a negative reaction to an antibiotic that I am taking."
Triage Nurse: "What kind of reaction?
Me: "Well, I kinda developed a rash."
TN: "Where exactly is this rash?"
Me: (Turning to see exactly how many people are listening in) "Um, its kinda in my butt region area place."
TN: "Ohhh, um, well, fill this out and take a seat"
So I sat in the ER waiting while text messaging (since you can't use your cell phone, um visibly, in the ER) Destiny a nurse in the hospital who informed me I had a good 4 hour wait til I'd be treated. Good thing Destiny is a liar and they called my name after only an hour and a half. They put me in a room with a robe (gasp! Not the drafty hospital robe!) and told me to put it on. I sat in my little (drafty) holding cell waiting for my doctor just imagining all the doctors standing outside my door drawing straws to see which one would have to give me a rectal exam. I watch way too many hospital shows. Thank goodness it didn't come to that. Not saying nothing invasive took place but I did Thank God there was minimal minimal tushy touching. After an hour of fighting with my doctor, assuring her I wasn't pregnant, she let me pee in a cup and gave me a pill that got rid of the damn rash. Moral of the story is, don't let your eye doctor give you anything but drops. Okay, maybe that just goes for me. My tushy is too damn sensitive. Alan, I love you to death, but this rash did knock you down a few points in my book. You suck!

Once a tomboy, always a tomboy!

You Are 50% Boyish and 50% Girlish

You are pretty evenly split down the middle - a total eunuch. Okay, kidding about the eunuch part. But you do get along with both sexes. You reject traditional gender roles. However, you don't actively fight them. You're just you. You don't try to be what people expect you to be.

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?

Roger Toussaint can burn in hell!

Shout out to Ali! Mighty Max 4-Eva!

So my week has been hella hella sucky. Not only did it start out with me in the ER (more on that in my next post) but after waiting up til 2:30 am Tuesday morn to find out whether or not there would be a transit strike, Satan, opps I mean Roger Toussaint came on the air at 3 am to announce there would indeed be a transit strike. This did not bode well with me since A) I really wanted to visit my doctor in midtown on Tuesday, and B) my easy 45 minute commute was about to become a nightmare. So Tuesday I stayed in the Heights and visited the hospital, the closest healthcare provider to my apartment. It wasn't an enjoyable experience. More on that later. Tuesday night I again couldn't sleep. Woke up wide awake, again, at 6:30 am. I'm usually not a morning person. Norm is hitting the snooze button a dozen, dozen and a half times. Here I was too nervous about my commute so I jumped out of bed. Took a car to the Bronx to wait in a 30 minute line in the freezing cold to buy tickets as we watched 2 trains come and go without us as we waited. Got to work an hour and a half later. On the way home I met up with some peeps to take the train back. They didn't to take a car from the Bronx so we walked. I walked 26 blocks and across the city to get home, in the freezing cold. It wasn't pleasant. Today was no better. Only difference was I took a car home from the train station. The question of 10 bucks or 26 blocks is something I will never consider again. I'm just gonna hop in the taxi. So Roger Toussaint, Trasit Workers Union President, you suck!

Why don't Jewish boys agree?

So the Cowboy leaned over and gave me the nicest compliment I've ever received in my life: "Damn you must be married or a lesbian!" At first I thought I would just tell him to F-off but then he said: "You darling, are the ideal wife". Let me set the stage for you. Last night Destiny and I hit the town and were sitting at the bar of our favorite (and only truthfully) country bar in NYC. I love it there. They've got a country only jukebox which I fill up as soon as I arrive with my usual Gretchen, Creedence, and Toby selections. Then I pulled up a stool to the bar where I had ordered a pitcher of Coors Light, for myself. The only reason I do this is that pitchers at this bar are so damn cheap its just more economical than buying a couple pints. Coor Light for example is only 7 bucks. Thats the cheapest high I could possibly find, except of course for that time I took an expired Vicodin for my toothache. That stuff really messed me up. Oh man. Good times. So Dest and I are sitting next to this fella who would have fit in much much better at a bar in Dallas. Hes wearing a really nice cowboy hat, boots, and hes got his rancher gloves sitting up on the bar. I swear, he looked like an anorexic version of Kenny Chesney. Keep in mind this bar is on 76th and Broadway. Obviously if this bar wasn't blasting George Strait, he probably would have gotten his ass kicked in that outfit. But here, he was the coolest guy in the place. So we sat next to him, cause you know how it is, cool by association. So I sat there, drinking from my pitcher of beer, watching the Broncos/Bills football game, and singing every country lyric that came out of that jukebox. Then came the comment:
Cowboy: "Damn you must be married or a lesbian!".
Me: "Um, what?
Cowboy: "You darling, are the ideal wife".
Me: "Um, what?
Cowboy: "Well I see you sitting there drinking your beer by the pitcher, watching a sport on TV that I don't even understand, and singing along to the jukebox. You have got to be any guys ideal wife."
Me: (Blushing) Um, thanks.
Then the cowboy bought Dest and I a shot (really yummy actually Malibu and Midori, way good). He didn't want it cause I guess it was too girly of a shot, especially since he was drinking manly Pabst Blue Ribbon by the can, but we made him anyway. He was a really sweet guy so we chatted a little more (he has an apt on CPW and 69th that he only stays in 3 months a year, ie he is loaded) and the only sport he watches is on the Golf Channel (ok, his cool factor dropped a few dozen points in my book, why oh why couldn't he have said OLN Channel which shows Rodeo and Bull Riding?) So let me end by posing the question in the title: Why don't Jewish boys agree? I am a damn good catch. I'll never yell at him for watching football (hell, I'll be sitting next to him on the couch) and I certainly won't fill up the fridge with stupid bottles of girly Chardonays or Merlots, I'll be drinking Bud Light just like him. I am, as the Cowboy suggested, the Ideal Wife. So where the hell is my Ideal Husband?

STRIKE!!!STRIKE!!!STRIKE!!!STRIKE!!!

STRIKE!!!STRIKE!!!STRIKE!!! So last night I was chanting this. If there were a strike today I would have had the day off. That would have been sweet since I am almost caught up on this season of Lost and could have watched a couple episodes. Now if the strike happens Monday morning we not only have to come to work, but I'll probably have to come in super early...with my boss! So now here I am at work after staying up all night waiting for news that there would be no work today so I could sleep in, the same way a little boy waits up watching a blizzard praying for no school so they can get out of the super hard math test. Now all I am is tired. Life sucks.

Shout Outs- Circus

So this is basically a Shout Out to Elana S, the coolest Bar Exam passing Great Necker I know. And who happens to be my only reader. Heres to you Elana. So I went to the circus tonight with my date Arona and Eli and Elie. It was mad mad fun. I usually hate that crap. Circus' are usually smelly. This one wasn't. Not as many animals. Only one horse, that was about it. There was an awesome doggy act with all these crazy cool dogs doing tricks and comedy and stuff. One even looked like my mom's maltese(ie a Paris Hilton tiny dog) Snoopy. Little white guy. Poops like little Tootsie Rolls. So cute. Then there were these two totally gay acrobat dudes who like did tricks with each other. They were so cool. Prob one of the coolest acts. Then they had the usual trapeze and a little Asian kid acrobatic troupe who kicked ass. And super incredible jugglers. There were 4 of them and at one point they were all juggling together 16 pins. That was mad cool. Go to the Big Apple Circus. It was awesome!

My kick ass week

So last week was fricken incredible. Thanks to a generous Chanukah gift from my mom (which she doesn't know about yet, j/k Mom in case you see this) I saw two amazing concerts last week. My favorite new band Sugarland was opening for Brad Paisley and Sara Evans at this little theater in Times Square. There not my total favorite, thats still the Dixie Chicks, but they are alike in many ways. There music includes some real country sound with a dude that plays mandolin and lyrics that seriously kick ass. Also their song Baby Girl reminds me a lot of Wide Open Spaces by the Dixie Chicks, one of my fave songs ever. What pissed me off was the whole time onstage, the lead singer was so self deprecating saying stuff like we are only here as a warm up act and we're nobodies etc, etc. It pissed me off. I bought the ticket primarily to see them. They put on an incredible show and I'm yet to hear a song I don't like. How many awards must we give them before they realize they are awesome on their own. Next was Sara Evans who I'm not the biggest fan of. In fact, I don't think shes a good live singer at all. Could barely hit the right notes. But she was really funny onstage making fun of her brother who is now her bassist and stuff. Next was the main act, Brad Paisley, who was such a contrast to Sugarland cause his music has a major rock and roll sound to it especially since he plays a sweet electric guitar. His music is also very funny and has a couple comic songs including his new one, Alcohol which speaks from alcohol's point of view, for example "I got blamed at your wedding reception for the best man's embarrassing speech", or "I help white people dance", or "I will make you put that lamp shade on your head". Funny stuff. All in all it was an awesome concert and I was so lucky to get a ticket to it. Then came Thursday. Thursday I got tickets to a private taping of Tim McGraw's upcoming TV special. Normally now Tim's tickets are well over 100 bucks. These were only 50 and I knew at the venue it was being held in, every seat was within inches of Tim. Like the Brooks and Dunn concert Destiny, my token country lovin' friend, and I were right near the stage. Tim put on a kick ass show and looked super hot although hes got a little beer belly now. I got on camera alot and even had a solo moment where I was taped singing some lyrics into the camera with 2 other hot chicks. So keep an eye out for me. I'm the one in the cowboy hat. Also, Deano, Tim's guitarist, kept throwing picks into the crowd which no one noticed cause it was so dark in there. At the end of the show I looked down and found one at my feet. Yay! At the end of the show the NBC producer came out and said Tim was going to retape the show an hour later and we were welcome to stick around. Knowing how rare an opportunity this was, Destiny and I stuck aroud. The second concert was even better. The crowd was way more pumped up (I think because it was later and people outside the city hence "real country lovers" were able to make it to the show). Tim even was fired up. He sang some extra songs and climbed upstairs to sit on his wife Faith Hill's lap. It was awesome. Anyway, that was my week. The first and probably last busy week I'll have for a long time. Until next time...

Susanne and Tim- Coming to a TV near you

I was at Tim McGraw's taped special last Thursday night. And being little outgoing Susanne, I was all over that tape. Being in NYC, not too many audience members looked like real cowgirls so I made sure to stand right in front of the camera wearing my cowboy hat (which basically blocked out anyone standing near me) during both of his performances including one solo where I got to sing into the camera during his song Back When. Stay tuned for my TV special in February. Fired up!

More Fun Susanne Info

1. How many people on your buddy list are exs?
Zero

2. What is your favorite part of the chicken?
Booby. Heehee.

3. What's your favorite town?
Huntington Beach and NYC- tie but each for totally different reasons.

4. How did your last relationship end?
Well I ain’t married, so obviously we broke up. Plus he wasn’t hot enough for me.

5. What's the first word that comes to mind right now?
Headache

6. When was the last time you saw your mom in person?
3 hours ago when I left for work. My moms in NY for a visit.

7. Whats the best insult you've ever heard or said?
I can't believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest. ~Steven Pearl


8. Who got you to join myspace?
I think it was Jen.

9. What did you have for dinner LAST NIGHT?
Peanut Butter Toast Crunch Cereal. Stuff is addictive.

10. How long have you been at your current job?
About 15 months.

11. Is Tom on your friends list?
Can you help it?

12. What's the last thing you said outloud?
See you soon. To my mom.

13. Look to your left. What's there?
My fax machine.

14. What is the last thing/person you spent over $100 on?
Broadway tickets to surprise my mom for tonight for the biggest show on Broadway.

15. Who is your favorite villian?
Reggie Mantle, always trying to steal Veronica away from Archie. What a shmuck.

16. Whats the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
Do earmuffs count? It was fricken cold last night.

17. Whats the last piece of clothing you bought?
I’ve given up on buying clothes. I live in a New York apt. Theres no fricken room to put stuff.

18. What word makes you laugh no matter where, when or how many times you hear it?
Booby. HeeHee.

19. What website do you visit the most during the day?
Besides my emails, www.OnlySimchas.com

20. Go into your text message log on your phone...what does the top message say?
Thank you for authorizing your last payment of $35.31

Do you have plants in your room?
My roommate brought a couple home this week, I was like don’t kill them cause I’ll be totally depressed.

If you could drink anything right this second, what would be?
Pure caffeine. And a big glass of Scotch. Caffeinated Scotch.

Last piece of e-mail opened?
Junk

Does anything hurt on your body right now?
Head

What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
Um, let me think, New York

Last alcoholic drink?
Glass of Scotch while watching the Country Music Awards.

Do you own a picture phone?
Yup

What's your most recent Ex's birthday?
No clue, didn’t date long enough to rifle through his wallet.

What were you doing last night at 9?
Seeing Wicked, the best Broadway show ever! Never saw anything like it before.

Do you exercise as much as you should?
Does anyone?

Did you do the deed on prom night?
Maybe if I actually won for Prom Queen. Damn you Kim Stemkowski. That tiara was mine! Not to say I never hooked up with my prom date at a different time. :)

Would you give your bf/gf a second chance if they cheated on you?
Hell NO. No one deserves that.

***SOME STRANGE QUESTIONS***

Something purple within 5 feet of you:
Book on my desk.

The sexiest item of clothing you own:
From 10 Things- You don't buy black underwear unless you want somebody to see it.

Your nails were last painted:
Before my friends wedding.

The weirdest thing you've ever heated in the microwave?
Ice Cream

How much Japanese do you know?
Sake! Domo. Kinichiwa. All learned from watching Kill Bill Volume 1.

Do you look good in yellow?
Yes

Do you sing?
I’m a better singer then people think.

Ever danced naked in front of a crowd?
Not sober.

Do you spit?
Yes, I’m a New Yorker. We do all things crude.

Is your hair long enough to chew on?
Finally. I’m growing it out for the first time ever!

Least favorite color?
Purple

Ever had Dippin' Dots?
No. Always wanted to though. I’m intrigued.

Ever played an instrument?
Played the clarinet in 5th grade cause I think we got to miss a class if we did or something.

Ever been to a palm reader?
I think we had one at Ali’s like 14th birthday party. That was before the highlight of good parties was the keg.

Did you have a good weekend?
Not at all. This weekend will be better.

Current yearning:
Winning the lottery.

Have you ever had a black eye?
My brother threw a football at my face from a short distance. That was also my first bloody nose. I thought it was so cool. I was such a damn tomboy.

How is the day going for you?
Good. Fridays are 4 hour workdays this time of year.

Any plans for tonight?
Going to Temple to do me some mingling then having some friends over for dinner.

Are you ready for Christmas?
I don’t celebrate it but I see Macy’s on 34th Street outside my window right now and they’ve had their Christmas lights up for a month already. Its crazy here.

Do you find Smurfette sexy?
Nope. But that babe musta got a lot of play.

Brooks and Dunn/ Craig's List

Craigslist NYC is an incredible resource for young New Yorkers without a lot of money to spare. With the CMA awards in town this week for their Tuesday night awards ceremony, all the incredible country artists have landed on the island of Manhattan, cowboy hats and all. Trying to make the most of this historic visit, a ton of incredible artists have scheduled concerts right here in the city. Not really figuring this out until pretty last minute, all of the best concerts were already sold out. So I went on Craig's List and plugged in some of the big concerts. The first one that popped up was Brooks and Dunn. I offered some dude who realized he had others plans for that night 50 bucks for his pair of tickets. He happily agreed. With concert tickets today for country, pop, and everything else going for $75-$100 for general admission this bid I was sure would be turned down. I also posted that I really wanted to go to the Brad Paisley, Sara Evans, Sugarland concert. On Craigslist you aren't supposed to sell tickets for more than face value and tickets for that concert were on 40 bucks. I love Sugarland, my new fave band, after the Dixie Chicks of course. Was contacted by some random NY woman whos friend cancelled that she was gonna go with. I'm not the type of person to generally go to a concert without a friend but her seats were incredible and she was selling for face value. I took her up on it. Turns out she actually knows some people I know which makes me think she won't murder me or anything if we hang out. The Brooks and Dunn dude lost 30 bucks in selling me the tickets but I am incredibly grateful. Brooks and Dunn have never been my favorite band out there but I know enough of their music to make a concert worth it. The concert was incredible. Decked out in my cowboy hat I bought on our senior trip to Puerto Vallerto after HS graduation, jeans, and tennis shoes (couldn't wear my boots cause it was standing room only and cowboy boots would grow uncomfortable for that long). I got to Irving Plaza the concert venue in no time leaving me to stand in line for an hour and a half before the doors opened, ensuring me a sweet spot. I was kinda embarrassed on the Subway so I didn't put on my hat, just carried it. That got me enough stares alone. Destiny got out of the hospital late and I had to leave her ticket at Will Call so I could run in and get us a good spot. The great thing about country is everyone is so damn friendly. I waited in line with a niece and aunt from Memphis and a family from the Bronx. Once I got inside I stood nearby those new friends, but also a 60-year-old Hispanic woman celebrating her birthday with her sister and a couple where the husband was drunk already when we got inside. You'll never see a more interesting bunch of folks than you'll find at a country concert. Alot of folks are just like me, in denial that they enjoy country music, always writing Anything But Country on a Fave Music listing on sites like MySpace. That is until they hear that one song that opens their ear for the first time. That song for me was Don't Take the Girl by Tim McGraw. It really opened my eyes to the truthfulness and beauty of the country lyric. Thats something I could no longer deny. So the concert was unbelievable. We were steps from the stage, maybe one person separated us from reach up and plucking their guitars ourselves. The opening band sucked (I don't particularly dig bluegrass, like I said before, the lyrics are what really drives the music for me) but when Brooks and Dunn came out the standing room only crowd just erupted. They put on an incredible show. They aren't stringy about throwing souveniors out to the crowd. Throughout the concert, Ronnie Dunn was throwing out drumsticks to the crowd. I caught one right away, almost got a second to give to Destiny but some fat dude stepped on it and I couldn't get it out. But hey, I'm not greedy one bit. They even made comments to the psyched crowd about how stupid it is to say there aren't any country fans in NY. This packed house in the Village of all places shows thats not true one bit. I thought that was great. Theres all this hoopla surronding country coming to NYC. All the papers are running stories and there are posters all over town. On the way home I proudly wore my hat on the subway and loudly sang You Can't Take the Honky Tonk Out of the Girl. It was awesome. The stares soooo did not bother me as I played drums with my new Brooks and Dunn drumstick. Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn are like the Country Music Missionaries to NYC. They are hosting the CMAs on Tuesday night, but not until they finish a free (I hope) concert from the roof of Madison Square Garden, the venue of the awards ceremony. Since MSG is a block from my midtown office I plan to be there for that concert and will try to get as close to the red carpet as possible. Anything to view my fave Tim McGraw. Love him! Anyway, thats all for now. Peace!

Yogi's

Being a Southern California girl in NYC isn't easy to begin with. The cold for one sucks ass. Highs have been in the 50s with nowhere to go but down. Also, there is no country music in NY. Or there hadn't been for years. Country artists skip over us on their national tours. There is no country music station in NYC. In fact I almost got in a fist fight with a station exec a few years back at a Tim McGraw launch party at South Street Seaport when I made a sign that said "Theres no Country Radio in NY, so I'm Moving to Jersey". Any New Yorker knows how cruel of a threat moving to Jersey could be. Its horrendous there. The exec erroneously claimed that there is in fact a country station in the city. He was full of crap of course. I lived next door to the Empire State building at the time so if anyone could hear it, it woulda been me. So anyway, I thought I had nowhere to turn. Until last Saturday night when my buddy, neighbor, and Huntington Beach native Destiny dragged me from a really crappy party along with random sweet Jewish Pediatrician Joe to Yogi's. This was a place I must have walked by hundreds of times. Located at 76th and Broadway on an extremely busy throughfare of NY I don't have a clue how I coulda missed it all these country neglected years. Yogi's is the kinda bar you would expect to find on a rural road in Alabama. Cheap beer pitchers and cheap jukeboxes plaining loud country music. I filled that box up with all the songs I never expected to hear in a NYC bar. Tim McGraw, Gretchen Wilson, Toby Keith, and a ton of others. It was quite an incredible night. I plan to head back there many, many more times in the future. It was like heaven on this little island of New York City. The first bar I felt truly comfortable in in this great city. Thanks Destiny!

Another new NJOP chap

Heres hoping some of you clever peeps can submit ideas. Please forward to any individuals, parents, teachers, or members of industry whom you think can help:

What are the best gifts for children this Hanukkah?

The National Jewish Outreach Program (NJOP) is looking beyond the shelves of Target and Toys "R" Us to find the best Jewish toys, books and games for children this Hanukkah. Our list of eight recommended products will showcase those that engage, inspire and inform children (toddler to teen,) helping them feel more connected to Jewish culture, heritage and religion.

Beginning November 4th, NJOP will accept suggestions and submissions from manufacturers, parents, store owners and children themselves. NJOP will consider the old and new, the expensive and the bargain item so long as the gift is "Jewish" in nature.

All items will be evaluated by a panel of experts including Jewish educators, child development experts, parents and children. The recommended items will be announced on November 29th.

"Each year parents struggle to show the beauty and background of an important Jewish holiday -Hanukkah- amidst the lights and Christmas decorations everywhere a child looks," said Rabbi Buchwald of the National Jewish Outreach Program. "This year, with Hanukkah beginning on December 25th, we wanted to help parents make Hanukkah very special and meaningful for their children."

To send book, toy, game or other product recommendations, please email hannukahgifts@njop.org. Manufacturers wishing to send product directly should contact Rachel Shtern at 646-871-4444 or Ilya Welfeld at 201.439.1010 for shipping instructions.

Deadline for submission is November 21st.

Things bothering me...

so its been a while since my last post but i've been bothered by some stuff lately that i thought i'd share with y'all. firstly, during my 4 hour shabbos nap this weekend i was awoken by the sound of the ice cream truck. that just sucks. not only did it wake me up with its damn jingling but i couldn't even buy anything cause you can't use money on shabbos. that rule stinks. sometimes you just want ice cream real bad. also shabbos afternoon you're usually fleishig so you can't even have ice cream. that sucks too. ice cream is too good to be off limits. speaking of jingling. this chick across the way decided to put up a wind chime. thats just inconsiderate to everyone in the damn neighborhood. my friend arona lives a block away from me and she can hear the damn thing. it keeps me up at night. what does one do about it? buy a bb gun? start a petition? so annoying. any suggestions? had some other stuff to complain about but forgot it now. will share more later. peace.