Susanne's Blog

Race to Nowhere

2011-03-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling the pangs to blog again recently. I've been tweeting so much in the last couple years that my blog has fallen by the wayside. I post these little 140 character worth nuggets and that has been enough to satiate me. If I have a little more to say, I post a message on Facebook with a little longer of a diatribe. But I just saw an announcement in the Chabad of Dallas e-newsletter that I thought was great and wanted to share. I decided a blog post was appropriate. Here goes....

From the Chabad email: Akiba Academy (the local Modern Orthodox Jewish Day School) is hosting a showing of the must see documentary, "Race To Nowhere," on Wednesday, March 30 at 7:00pm. The film addresses the issues of schools, parents, and students being pushed to over perform.

I think its important for all parents (and perhaps their kids too) to go and see a documentary like this. Today, kids are so overscheduled. School is one thing, and in the case of religious Jewish youths, is not only secular studies but a dual curriculum Day School or after school Jewish studies program. For other youngsters, they have sports, playdates, tutoring, music lessons, etc etc etc. We live across from a big park and every single day after school a group of kids line up waiting for their soccer tutor to show up. When I was a little kid, practice was once or twice a week. Not everyday. And somehow I managed to still make the all star team. Yes, supporting your kids in the endevours that they love is awesome! But pushing them to overachieve is another. The film they are screening shows the tragic side of our achievement-obsessed culture, but perhaps it will be an alarm clock for some parents and for students that don't even realize that they are pushing themselves too hard. I'm happy that the Dallas Jewish community is doing a screening of this kind.

Moving Sale/Giveaways!

2010-05-16T10:17:00.000-07:00

My husband Evan and I will likely be moving at some point this summer so I'm beginning to get rid of some items to bring down the exuberant cost of an interstate move. We have a ton of stuff to sell/giveaway before we move including a dresser, armoire, hanging storage, DVD storage, pantry, chairs, tables, Videos/DVDs/CDs, A/Cs and much much much more. We'll begin posting items and prices (many will be free with pick-up) and pictures here on the blog and Facebook so visit back often!

To start: FREE VHS Videos. First come-first served.

Circle of Friends
American Flyers
Tim McGraw- An Hour with Tim
In the Line of Fire
Hearts and Souls
Best of SNL- Wayne's World, Chris Farley, Best of 1993
Field of Dreams
Alanis Morrisette
My Best Friend's Wedding
Indian Summer
Greedy
Notting Hill
First Wives Club
Shag
Book of Love
Beaches
Ever After
GI Jane
Pure Country
Mickey Blue Eyes
For the Boys
WarGames
Twister
Hoosiers
Here on Earth
Steel Magnolias

3 Observations Since My Cruise

2010-01-13T15:34:00.000-08:00

I've basically screwed over my blog by plugging all my juicy observations about life into my 140 character Twitterfeed. But sometimes that's just not enough space. So folks, I've come back to my trusty blog. I got off of the Norwegian Gem this morning in NYC after 10 days on vacation. Here are three things that have occurred to me today:

1) After 10 straight days with an afternoon nap, you wish you were back to being a toddler since you're extremely sad to have given them up.

2) My stomach hadn't growled in 10 days. That's what 3 (or more) 5-course meals per day will do to you. I'm actually hungry for my dinner when I get home. Haven't felt a hunger pang in well over a week.

and 3) Life is so much easier when the schedule fairy drops a minute by minute itinerary by your stateroom door each night before you go to bed. I felt discombobulated today trying to plan out my own day.

That's it for now. I really need to write more. Sorry about that.

Another Year Come and Gone

2009-09-17T22:28:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I celebrated my 30th birthday. I am officially not able to get away with tantrums...in public anyway. I am officially too old to still know where my blankie is (but I do). I am officially old.

I am now at the age that I thank God that my parents are still around. I am also at the age where I regret not seeing them more than I do. I am now at the age where my friends are moving on. We used to all live in the same neighborhood, now we are all dispersed around the US, with new families, new jobs, new educations and experiences. Some even in foreign countries.

I am now at the age where I can be proud of my accomplishments. I don't think its big headed or egotistical to look back on a year and smile at your merits. I won't say it was perfect. I'm sure I harmed people. I'm sure I didn't try hard enough to repair relationships that I'd damaged. I'm sure laziness and the flaw of wanting to take on too much too fast kept me from helping more people than I did. But, I did do good stuff too.

There have been a lot of changes in my life over the past year. Most importantly, I married my bashert Evan. He is absolutely the perfect match for me. He lets me be myself with no reservations and tells me every day how awesome I am. I pray that I put into this relationship at least a percentage of what I receive, because even that would be a ton. I loved my wedding. Not that I remember much about it, but it had been a long time since my whole family had been together. My fam doesn't have many opportunities to see one another. I got to see cousins that I hadn't seen in years and that was awesome. I am thankful that Evan has a large and loving immediate and extended family. They are all so great and have made me feel incredibly loved and accepted as one of them. Even if I am too busy to say it all the time, I know that Evan and I are very blessed.

I have worked hard to help others too, not just myself. Professionally, I am still working at NJOP and have been writing their @JewishTweets on Twitter. I love having this opportunity and getting to meet amazing Jews throughout the world that are using Twitter (of all places, right?) to engage in their heritage, whether by asking questions, telling jokes or sharing an inspiring story. I'm also interacting with fans on the Jewish Treats Facebook Page. If there is anything you want to learn about Judaism, let me know. If I don't know the answer, I have great people to ask for help.

Also this year I've worked on ParnasaFest (see blog I wrote on it here). What started out over lunch in Downtown NYC last February has turned into a internationally recognized grassroots initiative. After the mass layoffs in the Jewish nonprofit world, a couple friends and I asked ourselves, how can we help. A couple days later, we hosted our first ParnasaFest, a job networking event for those who need it. Whether they're in need of a new job opportunity, in need of new business contacts, or needing to meet people who are dealing with the same craziness in their lives that they themselves are dealing with, if nothing more than to shmooze and commiserate. Whatever their reason for attending an event or utilizing resources on our website, I hope they found utility in our work. I think they have, and that makes me happy.

I have also become a matchmaker on SawYouAtSinai's sister site YUConnects which is meant to facilitate matches amongst those in the Yeshiva University community. I love having this type of tool at my disposal to help Jewish singles. If you are on either of the sites, please seek me out on the matchmakers page and send me a message. I'd love to try to help you find your bashert!

Also, I was inducted into the prestigious ROI Community of young Jewish innovators and attended their summit in Israel this past summer. What an amazing collection of people to be grouped together with. It was a great honor.

And finally, I was honored last month to receive a nomination from a friend of mine in the United Jewish Communities' Jewish Community Hero contest. Its a huge honor. A lot of my fellow nominees are just like me. They desire to help their fellow Jews every day. A couple nominees who I'm voting for every day are Rabbi Moishe Engel who started the Gan Israel in my community that I attended every summer growing up and I attribute a lot of my religious growth to that experience and my friend Sharon Weiss-Greenberg who has just taken on the role of JLI Co-Director at Harvard where she and her husband are working with the Jewish students on campus. Then there is the Jewish Robot William Levin, my fellow ParnasaFester Dave Weinberg, and many more. So many great people on there that I'm happy are being recognized for what they do. Here is my profile, please check it out and shoot me a vote if you can. The prize money could be a huge help for the Jewish projects that I work on.

That's the year in review. I am so thankful for the friends and family in my life. I love you guys alot. Thank you thank you thank you. Shana Tova Umetuka, I hope you have a happy and sweet New Year. I hope you have a prosperous year full of opportunities to better yourself and those around you. I hope you receive all the things you desire at the right times. I hope you take advantage of your new clean slate and start filling it up with mitzvos and good deeds. And I will do my best to do the same. Gmar Chasima Tova, May you be inscribed (in the Book of Life) for Good!

Susanne

Sending Chaviva to Israel

2009-08-26T21:30:00.000-07:00

Last year I participated from afar in a Jewish Blogger Convention. Now the Nefesh B'Nefesh Second International Jewish Bloggers Convention is coming up on September 13th in Jerusalem. I will be attending once again via the world wide web. I was reminded tonight after reading my friend Chaviva's blog that the next convention is soon approaching AND this year they're doing a special contest giving a blogger who wants to attend a free flight to Israel so he or she can attend in person. I think Chavi is the perfect blogger to win this opportunity. A) She REALLY wants to go B) she doesn't have a few extra grand to buy a ticket and hop on a flight (who the heck does nowadays?) and C) SHE'S AWESOME. I've met 1000's of people online via my social networks (Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, etc) and honestly, there are only a few I'd desired to meet in person. Just from reading her blog and her tweets, I knew Chavi was a great gal. We've met IRL and remain buds. I even got to meet her boyfriend Tuvia. He's awesome too! If Chavi wins she'll get to fly on a real Nefesh B'Nefesh aliyah flight and matched with up with an Oleh/Olah/Family, who she'll be able to blog about. If Nefesh B'Nefesh is looking for a blogger who can flesh out the journey of an oleh, she's the one. After all, she's been on quite a journey herself (read her blog, you'll understand). :) Pick Chavi!

Lend me a hand!

2009-08-20T11:28:00.000-07:00

I wanted to thank all of my supporters in the United Jewish Communities' Jewish Community Heroes contest! I'm so appreciative! I wanted to offer a couple reminders. You can submit a vote for me EVERY SINGLE DAY through October 8th (every 12 hours to be exact). This isn't just a one time vote AND you can vote for as many other nominees as you want. Voting for me does not mean you can't vote for your other friends who are nominated. A ton of other incredible peeps are my fellow nominees so I encourage you to check them all out and vote for those who inspire you! If you haven't yet today, you can click here to vote for me.

Also, I'm trying to mobilize some friends and blog readers to help get the word out about me. I'd be so grateful if you'd email your friends/family, dedicate your Facebook status for a short time, or even tweet about my nomination. Anything you can do to help would be hugely appreciated.

Sample text: Vote for my friend Susanne who is trying to raise money for her worthy community projects. Just click here: http://budurl.com/Vote4Susqhb

Thank you!

Susanne

Susanne Goldstone Rosenhouse | Jewish Community Heroes

Posted using ShareThis

Am I Your Hero?

2009-08-13T15:21:00.001-07:00

Some things come up and demand a quick post. I know I'm behind on writing about so many different things that I've been meaning to get to but I have so little free time of late. But here goes... I was nominated by a buddy of mine for the United Jewish Communities' Jewish Community Hero contest. Its a great honor for those of us who selflessly devote our time, energy, and tiny paychecks to the Jewish Community. Sometimes a thank you is all I need to get through a tough and frustrating patch. Getting recognized like this can give me an even bigger push. Below is the text from my friend's nomination:

Tell us about your nominee. Why should he or she be recognized as a Jewish Community Hero?

Susanne is the Social Media Coordinator of the National Jewish Outreach Program (NJOP), where she has been involved, since before social media was a normative means of communication, in reaching out to unaffiliated and loosely-affiliated Jews around the world, to engage them in their Jewish heritage. Originally a U.S.-based organization with a small reach into Canada as well, Susanne has helped to turn NJOP into a worldwide phenomenon, and has thereby touched the lives of millions of Jews worldwide, both directly and indirectly.

In her free time, Susanne co-chairs ParnasaFest, the international grassroots initiative providing job networking assistance for the Jewish community, teaches pro-bono social media classes at synagogues and organizations, volunteers as a matchmaker for Jewish singles, and has consulted for the World Jewish Congress.

What problem did your nominee identify in the community that needed to be solved? How has your nominee's efforts made a difference for others?

Through Susanne's efforts, NJOP has become a clearinghouse of information for Jews seeking to understand their cultural and religious identity. Previously, NJOP had a loose affiliation with synagogues around the U.S. that was most known for its Shabbat Across America program. Now, with over 4,100 followers on Twitter, a widely read blog, and growing networks among young and old alike, NJOP has transformed into a powerhouse for informal - and formal - Jewish education for all age groups and backgrounds. According to their 2009 report, NJOP, still a small organization with a dozen staff, "has successfully reached more than 1,054,000 North American Jews and engaged them in Jewish life," and its programs, "have been offered at more than 3,670 locations across North America and in 37 countries worldwide."

Some of my good friends are fellow nominees, including former roommates (Sharon that's you), my ParnasaFest partners Dave and Dani, fellow ROIers Tamar and Ari, and rabbis and community educators that I've become acquainted with via my work at NJOP. Every one of them is worthy of this honor for the incredible work that they do for their local communities.

I hope you'll find the time to take 30-seconds out of your day to click the below link and vote for me and other people who you think are deserving. You can vote once everyday through October 8th. Please encourage your friends and families to vote as well by tweeting my link or devoting your Facebook status update to my cause. Thanks for your support!!!

VOTE FOR ME HERE!!!

*Picture will be posted to voting site soon.
** Picture above shows how far I'd go for your vote. Even kissing babies on the campaign trail. ;)

Twitter and Hair Covering

2009-06-20T20:58:00.000-07:00

Well here we are. Susanne's Blog reboot, Take 9.

This has been a whirlwind year with about a trillion things absorbing my time. I got married, acquired a new roommate (the new husband), became a "professional" shadchan on a not-sure-I-should-blatantly-name-the-site-especially-when-you-can-figure-it-out-on-your-own dating website, got extra responsibilities at work, and if that weren't enough, I've learned to spend around 10 hours of my day on Twitter. Twitter snags all of my deepest thoughts before I have a chance to blog about them. It has literally destroyed my will to blog. I blame Biz Stone on my non-blogging. Biz, you have my dedicated blog readers (okay, reader singular) to deal with.

Here's what I wanted to mention. I was just in the shower after Shabbos. I had in mind that I needed to do my hair for tomorrow since we're attending the Yeshivat Chovevei Torah Rabbinical School Semikha Ceremony tomorrow morning. Some of our buddies including Rabbi Ben Greenberg and Rabbi Drew Kaplan (and others) with be graduating and off to save the Jewish community. Anyhoo, back to the hair. There is a mitzvah regarding the covering of a married woman's hair called Kisui Rosh. I practice this mitzvah basically by default. Just about everywhere I go is somewhere I want to cover my hair. Synagogue, work (I work in a religious office), and other Jewy things. Oh and softball. At softball I'm never not wearing a baseball hat but that mainly to block the sun, not for religie reasons. In the shower I tried to remember where my hair dryer is. When so few people get to see my hair it doesn't really inspire me to spend the time blowdrying it. What I've learned from this is that letting my hair dry naturally ends up looking just about as good as if I'd spent hours fussing over it. Had I not gotten married and had I not decided to practice this mitzvah, I'd still be wasting hours with my Conair3000 and there would be even less of a chance I'd have the time to post another blog. So enjoy my mitzvah keeping.

Purim Shpiel Vids

2009-03-13T10:16:00.000-07:00

My shul Mt Sinai in Washington Heights did a Digital Shorts competition to enhance their shpiel. Shpiel was good other than the little too pointed skit about tensions on the Mt Sinai board (that was cringeworthy) and the making fun of my shpiel last year. The stand out of the night was the video done by Dov Friedman, Aviel Tamir and Dudie Silberman. This was brilliant my young kiddush club lads. Check it out below.

I also submitted a vid myself since I heard that they didn't have many entires. I was just going to forget about it since I am so busy working on ParnasaFest and I was on vacation at the time, but I did it anyway. So I wrote a script, filmed, and uploaded it all in 2 hours. It was meant for a target group of people I knew who'd be at the shpiel that are in love with the shows Avenue Q and In the Heights as much as I am (I didn't think incorporating Spring Awakening would be appropriate in a shul setting). I didn't expect anyone else to get the jokes. Those that did loved it. Those that didn't didn't. I'm just happy they used my idea of opening the shpiel with an In the Heights rap. That was the bomb. Anyhoo, here's my vid.

ParnasaFest is Global!

2009-02-24T09:32:00.000-08:00

This economy is in trouble. No one is doubting that. No one had a "good year" (other than bankruptcy lawyers). Heck, even my mom's plastic surgeon is offering discounts (true story). No one is safe. A bunch of my friends started getting laid off. First the guys in finance lost their jobs. The recent financial scandal then rocked the Jewish nonprofit world. I interviewed about 5 years ago for a communications job at Hadassah. Had I got it, I probably would have been let go last month. I was killing for this one job in YU for many years. If I got that, I might have been fired last week. Who's next?

Who's next? That's the question that inspired my friends Dave Weinberg, Dani Klein and myself to stand up and do something. Two things that I care about are the Jewish community and the social media world. You might not think so but they have a common bond. Members in each of these communities care deeply for one another. Jews give tzedakah (charity) and aid to others in need. Social networkers happily offer free advice and support to strangers whenever it is asked for. We asked, why not bring the two communities together? The Jewish community is in need. Jews from all industries (business, non-profits, lawyers, even doctors!) are unemployed or are searching for new, better jobs at a time when it seems like there aren't any. Perhaps we can do our part by showing our Jewish friends and neighbors how to network and most importantly, help themselves.

I'm a strong believer in histadlus (basically, an effort). Everyone must make an effort if they want to see results. I often compare finding a job to dating. Think about it. To find a job, you need to put yourself out there in every way possible. Talk to people. Let your friends know what it is you are looking for. This is 2009, UTILIZE THE WEB (I met my husband online, why not my next job?). Most importantly, learn how to brand yourself. Make your next employer seek YOU out, not just vice versa.

ParnasaFest is Jewish networking during bad economic times. What we started over lunch during Jeff Pulver's SocComm has become an international grassroots effort to provide networking and job assistance opportunities for the Jewish people and the greater community at large. This is not only an event for the unemployed. So many of my friends have replied to me, "Thank you so much for thinking of me, but thank God, I am still gainfully employed". Even if you are in a job that you love, I encourage you to come to a ParnasaFest event in your city. Perhaps you might be the link between one of the attendees and their next job. Maybe you are a lawyer, but your sister works in an office that is hiring an accountant and you can refer someone their way. All that we ask is that you come ready to schmooze and eager to help a brother out. As the New York Lottery says, "You Never Know".

You can follow our most recent updates on Twitter and you can visit our new website, ParnasaFest.org. We are updating constantly with new ParnasaFest events throughout the world. What started 11 days ago with a small event at my synagogue in upper Manhattan is now a global initiative. We are now planning events in Jerusalem, London, Toronto and throughout the United States! (For a full list visit ParnasaFest.org)

Finally, we could use your support. We don't ask for much. If you are a believer in our cause, donate $5. Local, national, and even international sponsorships are still available. Contact us at parnasafest@gmail.com if you have any personal questions, comments, suggestions or want tips on how to organize an event in your hometown. Remember, you are our partner in this effort. All it takes is the will to help your friends.

Make a donation today!

25+ Random Things about Me

2009-01-31T21:47:00.000-08:00

This list was too hard to narrow down so my 25, so I'm doing as many as I want. I'll just keep going until my life stops being interesting. Plus some may have subcategories. Be prepared...

1. I was kicked out of the Hebrew Academy in preschool for A) counting sweaters instead of learning the Aleph-Bet and B) Corrupting Lubavitchers. They punished me by making me rake leaves with the janitor Jose. I was 4. That school should have been shut down. Its better now I've heard.

2. I was then held back in kindergarten for:
A) Reckless endangerment of my classmates; One time I tried to stab someone with a #2 pencil during California Achievement Tests. I missed her and instead stabbbed myself in the pinkie. The graphite is still visibly embedded to this day. Ask to see it next time you see me.
B) Not being able to figure out how to tie my shoes the way my teacher prescribed. To this day I still tie them in the special way I devised when I was 5. No bunny ears for me!!
C) One day I told my teacher I changed my name to Susie because I couldn't write the letter N. More on that story here.
D) I kicked the Principal in the groin. Or at least, thats how the legend goes.

3. My brother Brian's favorite "Let's embarrass Susanne" story is...when I was 6 I asked my mom if I could walk to the store around the corner and get an ice cream. She said no. So I went upstairs and stole money from my dad's antique slot machine and snuck out to go to the store. My bro got home 20 minutes later and asked my mom, "why is Susanne walking down the street by herself with an ice cream cone in one hand and a king size Snickers in the other?"

4. My mom sent me to Camp Ramah for a month when I was 8. I refused to send her any letters because I was so enraged. She finally begged me to send her a postcard (see pic). So I started sending hatemail. Sending your homebody kid away for a month with no friends should be considered torture. I missed my Atari...

5. When I was 10 I devised a plan to runaway from home with my next door neighbor Rani Cohen. We were going to ride his scooter all the way to Mexico. Via the 405 Freeway. We stole nickels from the slot machine to finance our trip. We made it down the block before I got bored and told him to turn back.

6. I am OBSESSED with Archie comics. My Bat Mitzvah was Archie-themed with a real Pop Tate's Choklit Shoppe and souvenirs were sweatshirts with a cartoon of me, Archie, and the gang. I'm wearing it right now.

7. My mom refuses to give away the pink tallis I wore at my Bat Mitzvah. She says she wants it to be an heirloom for my children. Fine mom, but my son's will hate you forever if you make me pass it onto my kids because my daughter's sure ain't wearing it.

8. I seriously fear that my children will be as nuts as I was. I thank God everyday how even tempered my husband is. He'll keep them in line. Yeah, him and a strong prescription for Ritalin.

9. I was an Eader Beaver (an Eader Eagle once they discovered Eader Beaver sounded obscene), a Sowers Viking, an Edison Charger, and a Yeshiva Maccabbee!

10. My favorite foods growing up were McDonald's Chicken McNuggets, fried shrimp from Sizzler, and Chicken Parmigiana. Now that I'm kosher I haven't had them in over a decade.

11. I invented the game FTJ (Find the Jew) on a trip to New York in 10th grade.

12. I was kicked out of Bais Rivkah production in Crown Heights with Stacey Gluck for yelling out names of the performers. We didn't know any of them. We just kept screaming Go Chani! Go Rivky! Go Rochel Leah! figuring it was likely that someone on stage had that name. Mrs. Swerdlow the Principal stopped the show to get on the mike to yell at us.

13. Was at the finale of Spring Awakening on Broadway. In fact, saw the show 5 times in the course of 15 months. One time, I saw it sitting between my dad and boyfriend (now husband). Lets just say, the sex scene was more awkward than usual at that performance.

14. Worked for a year in an all Satmar office. Rachel Shtern told me I should have told them on the first day that I understand Yiddish. To this day I'm convinced they were talking about me constantly.

15. My celebrity look-a-like is Tipper Gore. Need proof? Here she is doing Susanne Face.

16. I still have my blankie that I got when I was born and my favorite stuffed animal (Mr. Buns). My husband says he doesn't mind. Good, because I've known them 27 years longer than I've known him. They'd win in a fight hands down. Blankie and I have been through a lot...

17. I was on Family Feud. Our episode aired on Thanksgiving Day 2000, the most watched episode of the year. We were one of the more ridiculous families to ever be on the show. There was twirling involved in the dancing at the end of the segment. Oh, and my brother did "the snake" across the stage. Oh, and Louis Anderson hit on him.

18. I was a first team all-league softball player in high school. Other members of the team now play for Team USA.

19. I have been married 5 weeks to the day. I met Evan AKA The Rabbi AKA @RavTex on the online dating website Saw You At Sinai. I am now a matchmaker on its sister site YU Connects. I once did a stand-up routine about how ridiculous I found it that I kept getting set up with Rabbis. Now here I am, a Rebbitzen.

20. I've been on at least 10 cruises. When Evan told me on our first date that his family is also into cruises, I knew then that he was the one.

21. I've been to 14 countries: Bahamas, Belize, Canada, Cayman Islands, Honduras, Israel, Jamaica, Mexico, Netherlands, Portugal, Spain, Switzerland, United Kingdom, and of course the United States. The next time I leave the country it will God-willing be to take my parents to Israel for the first time. My dad says he can't wait to go to Israel with his son-in-law the Rabbi.

22. I used to go to events at the Balboa Bay Club (setting for the fake Newport Beach Yacht Club on the OC). One year I was part of their annual Easter Egg Hunt. One special egg was painted gold and had $100 bill inside. I saw some little blond babe pick it up and put it in her basket then followed her around until it "accidently" fell out. I got in trouble for that one.

23. I have more than 3000 unread emails in my Gmail inbox.

24. I have never smoked pot.

25. I would have been a terrific lawyer but a terrible law student. Thats why I'll never make the big bucks.

26. Have lived in 8 different apartments in 11 years. That counts dorms...but still, thats a lot of packing.

27. Counting the seconds until I never have to live in an apartment ever again. I need a lawn and I need a backyard. I don't like the idea of having to mow them. I'd just like to know that they are there.

28. I'm nervous about what my husband will write in his 25 things. Oy, I better get a chance to proofread that.

29. I love my parents immensely and know that I should tell them that more often.

30. I am a big fan of PBR. Both the beer (Pabst Blue Ribbon) and the sport (Professional Bull Riding). I can identify many of the riders by face. Thats something I'd be embarrassed about if it weren't for the fact that my husband is able to identify the BULLS by face AND also knows the name of the bull's father (their lineage is generally well documented).

31. I am extremely uncomfortable going places (parties, events, etc) where I don't know anyone. I turn into a very shy version of Susanne. For those of you that know me, its hard to picture a shy version of me. That's because I have since developed a version of myself that makes it seem as though I'm comfortable in any situation, when I'm really freaking out on the inside.

32. I've been to at least 6 concerts that I thought were mindblowing.

6) KIIS FM Wango Tango, 1999. Dodgers Stadium. Ricky Martin, Britney Spears, Will Smith, 98 Degrees, Blondie, UB40, Shaggy, and Enrique Iglesias. The line up was just okay, the peeps I was with made it awesome. Including when Garza spilled her beer on the kids sitting in front of her and then spent the next 3 hours buying them snacks because she felt so bad.

5) KROQ Weenie Roast, 1999. Irvine Amphitheater. Red Hot Chili Peppers, Metallica, Limp Bizkit, Blink-182, Sugar Ray, Live, Kid Rock, Smash Mouth, Orgy, Pennywise, Moby, Lo Fidelity Allstars, The Living End, Freestylers, Lit. What an amazing line up. Plus, I can say I saw Metallica LIVE. Plus, Blink-182 is probably in my Top 10 favorite bands. Yup, me. Country girl loves Blink.

4) Dixie Chicks opening for Tim McGraw. Glen Helen Pavillion. First time seeing my two all-time favorites in one show.

3) George Strait Country Music Festival, 1999. Angels Stadium. George Strait, TIM MCGRAW, DIXIE CHICKS, Alan Jackson, Kenny Chesney, Jo Dee Messina.

2) Tim McGraw private show. South Street Seaport, NYC. For the release of Set The Circus Down. My first time meeting Tim in person.

1) Dixie Chicks private recording session. Time Warner Center, NYC. XM Satellite's Artist Confidential. As I told my boss when I explained that I needed to take the afternoon off. I was going to meet 3 of my idols. Read more about it here.

33. I love that something mundane like the "25 Random Things" note has finally gotten some of my funniest friends to write. Some of my least funny friends too, but hey, thats still awesome. Next step, start a damn blog. Its easy! Here's a link: www.blogger.com (I'm www.susqhb.blogspot.com). Not enough time for long verse? Try a microblog like www.Twitter.com and find me @susqhb! And enjoy!

Overheard in Shul

2009-01-25T08:51:00.000-08:00

I'll say it again...Twitter has ruined my bloglife. I write on my microblog and then don't have the patience to come back here and expand on it. That added to being busy at work means my blog suffers. My poor baby.

But something happened in shul yesterday that was hysterical. My makom kavua (usual seat) in shul is a seat that is always empty when I arrive no matter how late I am. It has a lot to do with the fact that this particular row is very tight. Not a lot of space. But it also has to do with the fact that its directly in front of a group of old timers in shul who enjoy commentating during services. The exact thing I'll be doing in shul in like 50 years. The topic they are most likely to be discussing is the "young people" in shul who are rude and only there to socialize. This week I came to shul early (during the haftorah) because we were helping sponsor the kiddush after services that was commemorating the 5th yarzeit of my friend Mikey Butler (Mikey was the MAN!). Trying to alter this group of ladies' perception of the youngsters I always make sure to smile and wish them a "Good Shabbos" when I get to shul. They love me. This week I gave them my usual "Good Shabbos" and the ladies all looked at each other and smiled. Then one of them clapped me on the back and said "Now SHE always wishes us a Good Shabbos!" And another said, "She'll make a GREAT Rebbitzen!" And I laughed and laughed, all the way through Aleinu. I will make an excellent Rebbitzen.

Tehillim for Wedding

2008-12-17T14:39:00.000-08:00

Its said that on your wedding day you have a direct connection to God. I plan to take full advantage of this. But I don't want to just pray for myself. I'm here for you too. If theres anything in life that you would like an additional blessings for, please let me know. It could be to find your soulmate (shidduch), find a new job or get a raise (parnassah), pray for someone who is sick (cholim), or anything else you feel you need some extra karma on. Please either leave a comment here (if you want to keep it private, still leave a comment, everything is moderated before its published and if you want it not published, just make note for me), reply to me on Twitter (@susqhb), or message me. Try to include your Hebrew name (if you have one) and your mother's Hebrew name (if you don't know it, just include her name). Also, make note of what it is you'd like me to pray for. You don't need to know who I am. If you are somehow reading this, or a friend sent you here to submit a name, thats good enough for me. Many blessings to all! May we see Only Simchas from here on out!

LA Weather

2008-12-17T09:53:00.000-08:00

Dear God,

In 2 days I will be privy to the 10 Day forecast for December 28th. That's my wedding day. Please let the weather be beautiful so my guests can appreciate the "divine" (double entendre there, how do you like that God?) weather of Southern California. Thanks.

Your Most Benevolent Worshipper,

Susanne

Dear Person Posting Simcha on OnlySimchas,

2008-11-20T17:17:00.000-08:00

Here's the dealio. If you don't know your friend well enough to know the first AND last name of the guy they are becoming engaged to, there is no way in hell that you are the appropriate person to be announcing their simcha with the world. I say this every day. As I make everyone aware, I am a huge OnlySimchas fan! I rejoice in all the simchas posted there. There is a lot of sadness in the world, so sharing your family's joy with the world is a beautiful thing. But I just went on to see what was new and saw this. Engagement of LUCKY CHOSSON & "Chick from Brooklyn" (not her real name, no need to write it here). The Lucky Chosson part was the real name listed for the dude. Here's the story.

A) Not everyone wishes to be posted on the site. For whatever reason, its still their perogative.
B) As stated before, let a closer friend post the damn thing. If you've never met the guy, maybe waiting until a family member or someone who knows them better gets around to it.

Well, thats all I've gotta say. Live long and prosper. But whatever you do. Don't forget to post your good tidings on OnlySimchas!

40 Days til Wedding

2008-11-19T10:34:00.000-08:00

Forty days until my wedding on December 28th. The number 40 has great significance in Judaism. So I compiled some different sources speaking about why the number 40 is so important to us Jews.

Take for example from Rabbi Shraga Simmons of Aish:

"The number forty has significance throughout the Torah, and the Talmud.

For example, when a person becomes ritually impure, he must go to a ritual bath, a Mikveh. The Talmud tells us that a Mikveh must be filled with FORTY measures of water, and a person, must completely submerse himself in it. After being submersed, he leaves the Mikveh ritually pure. It is no accident, that in the story of Noah, the rain poured for FORTY days, and surrounded the world with water. And just as a person leaves a Mikveh pure, so too when the waters of the flood subsided, the world was pure.

According to the Maharal (16th century, Prague), the number FORTY has the power to raise up something's spiritual state. Just as FORTY measures of water purifies a person, and FORTY days of rain purified the world, so too Moses being on Mt. Sinai for FORTY days also had a purifying effect, in that the Jews arrived at Mt. Sinai as a nation of Egyptian slaves, but after forty days they were G-d's nation.

In the Deuteronomy, Moses tells the Jewish people that he had "led them FORTY years in the wilderness," (29:3-4) after he told them that "G-d has not given you a heart to know, and eyes to see, and ears to hear, until this day." So we see, it took the Jewish people FORTY years in the desert before they could understand the things that took place. Accordingly, the Mishna in Ethics of Our Fathers explains that "a man of forty attains understanding." (5:26) (Ethics from Sinai)."

This I found on the Torah.org site:

The number 40 occurs most conspicuously in connection with the Flood (40 days), with Moses on Mount Sinai (40 days, during which the Jews made the Golden Calf), and with the time the Jews spent in the desert (40 years, in punishment for their listening to the spies who had spent 40 days exploring the Promised Land). Thus 40 seems to be associated with punishment. Note that for violating a negative commandment the Torah specifies a punishment of 40 lashes (which the sages interpreted as 39). Perhaps the association with punishment is related to the fact that 40 is the numerical value of "yad Ha-Shem" (14+26).

This is from the Faqs.org site:

Forty days after a child is conceived, the Talmud tells us, the soul
enters the body. Forty, therefore, is a symbol of birth, rebirth and
change. It is interesting to note that it was recently found that
neural activity does begin at 40 days after conception. This also
means that abortion is permitted in more instances within the first 40
days of pregnancy than during the rest of pregnancy.

And finally, there is an idea that praying for a specific thing for 40 straight days is a great segula. I have friends that recited Shir HaShirim 40 days in a row to merit finding their bashert. There is a group, Western Wall Prayers, that will pray in your merit at the Kotel (Western Wall) for 40 straight days. They explain their mission as:

"Chazal (our Sages) have long spoken about the Segula of praying for 40 consecutive days. Whether one recites shir hashirim (King Solomon's Song of Songs), tehillim (King David's psalms) or personal heart-felt words, 40 days is a significant time period to arouse G-d's mercy.

Praying for 40 consecutive days specifically at the Kotel (Western Wall) is a famous practice of Jews in Jerusalem. Most people have heard about the popular Segula through word-of-mouth and have made the pilgrimage for marriage partners, income, children, healing and other.

According to Rav Sheinberger, author of a popular commentary on the Zohar (the definitive book of Kabbalah), the Segula was officially coined by Rabbi Yisroel Yaakov Fischer, of blessed memory - one of the leading Sages of the last generation. Dayan Fischer reportedly said that if someone goes to the Western Wall for 40 consecutive days to pray for 1 thing, it was a special Segula of its own."

I get it. 40 is an important number. I have 40 days until my slate is once again wiped clean. Evan and I will start a brand new life together on this day. I must do teshuva. I must free myself of all my ill feelings towards others. I must make ammends. I have 40 days left to "pack" for this journey.

Who I'm Voting For

2008-11-03T20:19:00.000-08:00

On April 26, 2007 I wrote my first of many candidate analyses. I ranked the order of the potential candidates in order of who I'd vote for and why. Senator Barack Obama was #7. The order is as follows.

1) Al Gore (D)

2) Hillary Clinton (D)

3) Bill Richardson (D)

4) John Edwards (D)

5) John McCain (R)

6) Mitt Romney (R)

7) Barack Obama (D)

8) Rudy Giuliani (R)

My defense for Senator Obama's low rating was as follows: Obama Who? Where did this guy come from? I'd never heard of him until last year. He is a first term, junior Senator from Illinois. Sure hes a wonderful orator, hes good looking, and very well educated. But what kind of experience does he have that he should be the leader of the free world? I'm 100% in favor of a President who is not a white, middle aged, male. Thats why I have Hillary (female) and Bill Richardson (Hispanic) near the top of my list. Obama, leave this race right now and run again in 8 years. You will have my vote. I promise. But first you need to put on public record where you stand on the issues. And convince me that you are passionate about Israel a little bit more.

When I was on the Fox News Channel's panel for undecided voters I said I considered myself undecided because if my Democratic choice (Senator Clinton) was not the nominee I'd consider voting for the Republican candidate. After all, McCain was two spots ahead of Obama on my list.

I had liked John McCain for a long time. I always thought he was a Moderate Republican. Didn't blindly vote party lines. Instead he voted what he believed was best for America. That was until he chose Sarah Palin. Governor Palin as a running mate is the antithesis of what all moderate voters saw in John McCain. She is just not what I would want to see in a potential running mate. Was Joe Biden ever pranked by a Canadian radio show using a ridiculously fake French President Nicolas Sarkozy accent? And if he was, would he have fallen for it? No. The woman who did fall for the prank, the woman running under a 72-year-old man with a history of health problems, is not ready to be President and frankly never will be. She is unable to make her own decisions without being schooled by instructors. She does not have the intellect to comprehend the complexity of world issues. She does not have my back when it comes to women's rights. She does not have my vote and therefore, neither does the man at the top of the ticket.

Tomorrow, I am voting for the lesser of two evils. I am afraid to vote for the Republican ticket because I am scared of empowering Sarah Palin. I am disappointed in Senator Obama for not choosing Senator Clinton as his running mate. Together the Democrats could have sailed to the Presidency. Now we are looking at a potential 2000, one party winning the Popular vote while the other wins the Electoral count. Its far fetched but its possible. It could happen again. There are other Hillary supporters out there that are hoping for an Obama upset to open a 2012 Hillary run. I want the Dems to win today! Not in four years! I'm not going to be like McCain, picking someone who my advisors decide on. I will choose the man who is best for America. And that my friends is Senator Barack Obama. I hope you all (especially those in the swing states, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Florida, listen up, I'm talking to you) agree.

Shana Tova Greetings from Susanne

2008-09-29T08:02:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends, Fam, and Followers,
I wanted to write you this year to make sure you have wonderful Rosh Hashanah and a meaningful Yom Kippur. At this time, as we are beginning a new year, we must take time out of our busy schedules for a bit of introspection. With each new year we must grasp this clean slate and ask ourselves, what can we do this year to be a better friend, a better parent, a better spouse? Let's fill this year's slate with Torah, and Mitzvos, and most importantly Love. This is the Season of Love (those noticing the Rent reference, nice work). Let's commit ourselves to loving not only our friends, parents, and spouses, but Klal Yisroel as a whole. Only then can we actually see ourselves coming closer to the ultimate redemption, the coming of Moshiach. This year has been a busy one for me. This year I met Evan, my future Rabbi Hubby. For all of you who always insisted that I'd end up a Rebbitzen since our days at Darchei Binah, well, you won that bet. I've learned a lot from Evan. He is one of the most selfless people I have ever met. Always there to lend a helping hand to a friend. This makes me want to help others even more. Whether its helping them find somewhere for Shabbos, deal with the big issues, or my new hobby, finding them a shidduch (if you haven't yet, send me what you're looking for!). I just want to be a better person. I've tried hard not to push away my friends because of a relationship. I've lost many friends who have gotten so wrapped up in their relationships and weddings that I promised myself for years that I would not do the same. Hopefully I didn't sleight anyone since I've been so overwhelmingly busy this past year. With this in mind, I hope that you can somehow find it in yourself to forgive me for any of the transgressions that I have committed, whether I did them knowingly or unknowingly. I will of course do the same for you. May all of our relationships with our families, our friends, and our fellow man be stronger this year than ever before. I hope this coming year will be filled with nothing but Simchas for us to share together! I hope for a year of blessings and prosperity for us all. Gmar Chasima Tova!
Love,
Susanne

PS If anyone's emails were left out, please know it was done unintentionally. Hopefully all of my loved ones will receive this message somehow through my Twitter page (www.twitter.com/susqhb) or my Facebook (http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=502647624&ref=name) or my blog www.susqhb.blogspot.com.

Had I known...I'd have been a Rabbi

2008-09-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

I just spoke to a lovely rabbi in the Greater Philly area. When I went to her shul site to double check the address I saw that the other rabbi in her shul had the same last name. Its not the most common name, so my guess is that they are married. It comes up pretty often when I find that two rabbis at a congregation are married to one another. Obviously I'm not referring to Orthodox institutions since they do not ordain women. I guess in the Reform and Convervative movements when a couple meets in Rabbinical school, they have a good heads up that their suitor is like minded in terms of their connection to Judaism, making it a good match from the get-go. Of course, there was one time when I called a congregation and asked for Rabbi X and the receptionist asked, which one, and I said Rabbi XX, and asked, oh, are they married? She said, um, they're divorced. Awkward! But anyhoo, point is, had I known how easy it was to meet my match had I gone to Rabbinical school I would have gone years ago. Well, it took some time, but at least I did in fact find my Rabbi. The question now is, when they announce us for the first time as husband and wife, do they say "Rabbi and Rebbitzen", or "Rabbi and Reverend"? :D

Am I a Stern Girl?

2008-09-18T07:52:00.000-07:00

This morning, for the first time ever, someone asked me if I was on my way to Stern on the train. She needed directions I presume. I was wearing the same exact thing I've worn pretty much everyday for 10 years. Denim skirt, polo shirt, and zip sweater. What could possibly have been different today that made her query me and not the girl next to me also wearing a skirt and long sleeves? Must be the engagement ring....

Wedding Music

2008-09-16T10:38:00.000-07:00

We booked whats supposed to be the most excellent Jewy band in LA/Orange County for the wedding. I was just sent a website where you can view all the songs that the band can cover. First thing I noticed. Not nearly enough Tim McGraw tunage. Or any for that matter. I think more Orthos need to play Tim at their nuptials. I was just going through the wedding band's song list and....Oooh Beatles, lets see what songs are listed here.....OMG.....Do they really get requests for Eleanor Rigby from couples?! Isn't it about chick who died alone? Really?!! Some people seriously need to rethink what songs are really about. Yup pretty song. Not exactly appropriate sentiment though. Like I'd LOVE to walk down to the opening bit of a Rascal Flatts song. Its a beautiful string piece....but its a song called I'm Moving On. Again, not sure the right kind of appropriate for that moment.

Spin

2008-09-11T02:04:00.000-07:00

It seems as though every other post I'm apologizing for not writing more. And here I go again. Sorry loyal readers. My life is hectic. Be patient.

So heres the story. I'm packing and throughout I've been throwing clothes in the laundry bag to be washed. Tonight was when I got through the four loads that needed to get done. I then proceeded to fold the laundry (this alone took all night, its now 2 am). When I finished I counted 43 freshly laundered pairs of underwear. This can be seen two ways depending on how you spin it. I'm not completely sure its natural to own that many. But I'm a sucker for buying undies in bulk. As many of you know, my favorite store is Costco and when I make a trip I usually pick up another package. If its a cute design, two packages. Thats one way to see it. I just have an undie fetish and own so many that I have to wash a ton whenever I do the laundry. The other is, How the hell long has it been since I've done laundry? Don't think about this too long. Might make you gag a little. Anyhoo, this is what happens when you can't sleep and decide to blog in the middle of the night. You write embarrassing things. Good night all.

Our Wedding Monogram

2008-09-10T13:19:00.000-07:00

One of my bestest most talented buds put this together for us. I think its amazing. My only goal was to have all of our Hebrew initials incorporated somehow, and bonus points if I had to do some detective work to make out some of the letters. Can you find them all? Shin, Mem, Aleph, and Yud. And of course a Resh for Rosenhouse. :)

Dear Anonymous

2008-07-31T14:51:00.000-07:00

Dear guy who has way too much time on his hands,

You know who you are. You spend all day on my site driving up my sitemeter, thereby directing more traffic to my site and more ad money to my pocket. For that, I thank you. I originally just planned to ignore your ridiculousness, but instead think you deserve a thank you. Feel free to keep posting inappropriate comments to my various blog posts. Calling me whatever names you'd like. I really don't mind as long as my numbers keep going up. After all, you've figured out that I'm not posting them. I'm not even reading them. Everytime I get an email saying "Anonymous" has posted again, I laugh to myself. Its a shame that this wuss who won't even identify himself is hiding behind his sense of invisibility. Hiding behind the AOL account that he uses to connect to the internet. Why don't you spend your time more wisely. Throw the ball around with a buddy. Take someone on a date. Call up an old friend who you've lost touch with. Anything must be better than reading my blog. But while I still keep you busy, knock yourself out.

New Potter Trailer

2008-07-30T07:46:00.000-07:00

Positively frightening. And they didn't even show the really scary stuff (like the inferi in the lake ""shutter""), just Dumbledore's visit to the orphanage to visit the young Tom Riddle. Now everyone says that it wasn't until HP 4 that Rowling got really dark, and while thats kinda true, it wasn't until this book, HP6 that I was chilled to the bone. One of my faves of the series and the one that I think fleshed out the Dark Wizard's backstory and really because of their duality, in essence, Harry Potter's. I remember the first time I saw the first trailer for Sorcerer's Stone. I was in DC for the summer. And we went to see that horrible movie AI just for the trailer. Just seeing the trailer was an event in itself. So enjoy!

If above video is not available, try clicking here. Movie is being released in the US on November 21st. Go see it!

BREAKING NEWS! SavvyAuntie.com Launches!

2008-07-09T09:35:00.000-07:00

Back in March I briefly offered a shout out to a site that I heard was in development entitled Savvy Auntie. The particular post was on the book The Panic Years: A Guide to Surviving Smug Married Friends, Bad Taffeta, and Life on the Wrong Side of 25 without a Ring by Doree Lewak. The book and the elongated title explains, touches on relationships with your friends who are married (while you are not) as well as those who have kids. I remember thinking in Stern after my first close friend Alissa got married, wow looks like shes winning in this race called life. Then a year later her first son was born and I thought, damn, not only is she winning, she's lapped me. That was in 2001. She just delivered her THIRD child b"H in May, one week after I got engaged to my fiance Evan. So I guess I may have gained ground in this race, although, it'll be years (if ever) for me to catch up to her and her bountiful fam.

For a long time I just accepted the fact that there was a good chance I'd be an old maid. Its widely believed that there is a "singles crisis" (their words, not mine) in the young frum world. So anyone who doesn't fit into the teeny tiny box of whats an ideal man or woman in the frum world just might be single for a while. For a woman, you can generally read that as thin, because thats pretty much all frum guys are looking for. Although, not always true, I have some incredibly hot, professional friends who remain single (gentlemen, contact me for their numbers). Guys in the frum world are just generally stupid, so thats why they let these lovely ladies slip through their fingers. For men, they must have a six figure salary. Bald, fat, and toothless are not factors. Those guys still have no problem finding wives. As long as they take home 100K.

Since there are so many women getting married later and later in life, many are putting off having children. That doesn't neccesarily mean that they aren't actively involved in childrens' lives. A large majority of my girlfriends have extremely close connections to their nieces and nephews. They take them to the circus (as my bud DJ did last week), they act as confidants, and they get to be another adult that loves the children unconditionally and spoils them rotten. Every kid needs more than two adults to fill that last role. When I was little, I needed like 20 aunts and uncles to yield the amount of attention my precoious younger self required.

Right now SavvyAuntie.com is being launched like literally as I type this blog. This website can act as an online community (the first of its kind) for hip aunts, great aunts, godmothers, and my own personal coined term quasi-aunts, to communicate with one another on all the important things it means to be an aunt. Biological or not. For instance, two weeks ago I went to my quasi-niece's first birthday. Being a woman in my late 20's with pretty much no experience around little ones (I've changed like 5 diapers in my 28 years) I had no idea what to get her for a gift. Had I had this community to turn to for advice, I would have had a much easier time of gift buying. I would have known a Playstation wasn't a good idea (just kidding, I found like some ball thingy, for ages 1-3).

All that said, yes, I plan to, God willing, one day have a family. Not neccesarily anytime so soon. I'd like to enjoy married life for a little while before popping out a little one. For now, I'm content doting over my two nephews who live in Las Vegas (when I see them, which is usually once a year if that) and my brand new nephew (Evan's brother's son), as well as my countless other quasi-nieces and nephews, children of my close friends. They're awesome little tykes. And I'm their Aunt Susanne! If you fit this category, visit SavvyAuntie.com today!

Mormons are cool!

2008-07-02T08:35:00.000-07:00

Okay, so this is my 301st post. No fanfare needed. I keep getting these funny ideas to write about and when I get to my desk at work or my laptop I become so busy with other stuff I never get around to articulating the humor to y'all. So since its been awhile I thought I'd come on here and punch in a couple quickies.

This morning on the subway two young Mormon elders got on the train. A man in his 30's initiated a conversation with them and he chatted about faith, family, and spirituality with these young missionaries from 175 to 59th street. I give the Mormon faith major props. Not that I'm in favor of any religion proselytizing (Jews actually turn away prospective converts), but making people explore life's positive attributes, even if its a 30 minute conversation that doesn't translate to anything, is a great thing. I mentioned before that I grew up in the Mormon stronghold of Orange County, California. My high holiday services (since the synagogue wasn't large enough to hold all of us once a year Jews) were held at the local Mormon temple each year. They had seating for 1000! The Mormon faith puts a strong emphasis on family and moral values. My father is a district commissioner for Eagle Scouts in the area and a large majority of the young men he meets with come from the community. Our next door neighbors growing up with a large LDS family. I remember when the mom first came to my mom after we moved in and started talking up the religion, my mom said straight out, "listen, you don't try to convert us, we won't try to convert you. We'll have a better friendship that way". Religion was never really mentioned again. We had a great relationship with this family for many years. Thats all I really wanted to say. So the next time you see an elder or a young Mormon lady (not sure what their title is) be sure to say hello. You can usually recognize them by their big lapel name badges, their bicycles, and their backpacks. Good times!

300

2008-06-18T23:46:00.000-07:00

This is my 300th blog post. The End.

P.S. Today's a Woot-Off!
Will this be my lucky day where I finally win a bag of crap?! Woot= One Day, One Deal. A Woot-Off is when they continiously throughout the day post new products at dirt cheap prices. The "bag of crap" is life's most coveted possessions. If you Woot, you know that I'm talking about. Oh yeah.

RIP Tim Russert

2008-06-13T15:39:00.001-07:00

Tim Russert died this afternoon in DC at the age of 58. Honestly I'd never known who he was until the 2000 election. When the state of Florida toggled back and forth between Al Gore and George W, Tim remained our constant. I was like, who is this guy? All the other networks had expensive FX on the screen with a map of the United States and a ton of blue and red numbers. But there on NBC was this guy Tim Russert and a whiteboard that was probably picked up at Staples before he got to the studio. I watched him until 4 AM as he explained the electoral college math and what it would take for each candidate to become President of the United States. I was fascinated. Of course, the state of Florida eventually landed in President Bush's hands, but for those few hours in the middle of the night it could have gone either way. And Mr. Russert was the one who helped us understand. I went on to do my thesis paper on the electoral college. And Tim Russert had a lot to do with that. I'll always remember Tim...and his whiteboard. Thanks Tim for making politics make sense.

10 Years

2008-06-12T08:07:00.000-07:00

10 years ago yesterday, on June 11th, 1998 I graduated from Edison High School in Huntington Beach, CA. I've mentioned before in my blog, but I'll happily say it again, I LOVED high school. I made some good friends, went to some great parties (mostly at the Nadler hacienda), hit a lot of softballs, won a lot of gavels (from Model UN), was Student of the Month (in a school of 1,600, thats pretty impressive), and was almost named Prom Queen. I like to say I was runner up because we didn't have a runner up but if we did I'm sure it would have been me. :) I never got great grades because I was lazy as shit but I stayed above 3.0 throughout my time there. I was supposed to graduate with honors but was one Spanish class shy of the requirement. I hated Spanish. Spent 2 1/2 years in remedial Spanish and can say "Yo Hablo Susanne". Thats about it. I wish I could have foreseen living in the barrio affectionately known as Washington Heights where Spanish would have been infinitely helpful.

And then we graduated. We wore our green robes and sat in the heat in the Edison Bowl. What I regret is that I didn't really appreciate the impact of that day. There were people there that I saw every day for 4 years. Now I haven't seen them in 10! I wish I took more pictures. I wish email was more widely used back then. I wish Facebook existed. I wish we had Myspace. I wish I'd stayed in touch with my peeps. I wish I still had my old 1982 Honda Accord Hatchback. I wish I had applied myself more.

We have our 10 Year Reunion coming up this November. I can tell you I am so excited to see all my old friends. But I can't help but think, what if I could go back 10 years and do things differently. Would I be a lawyer like I'd always planned? Would I be the observant Jew that I am today? These are questions that we cannot even think about. We need to love the life we live. And thats what I'm doing.

Happy 10th Anniversary Edison High School Class of 1998!

Happy Birthday Evan!

2008-06-04T10:04:00.000-07:00

Wishing a Happy Birthday to my main man, Evan "Tex" Rosenhouse AKA The Rabbi AKA the BF AKA The Fiance (depending on which previous shout out you've read). Love you babe!

I think its over...

2008-06-02T09:28:00.001-07:00

EphShap just forwarded me an RSVP link for an Election Night Rally for Senator Hillary Clinton...at Baruch College in New York City. She's coming home. Instead of hosting a victory or concession speech in the last two primary voting states, South Dakota and Montana, she is hosting a rally here, in her home state of New York. I had planned to try to get Broadway tickets to Cry-Baby the new John Waters musical based on the Johnny Depp movie, but gosh, I think I really want to be there with one of my heroes, Hillary Clinton, in what I fear may be shaping up to be a real concession speech. Like the real deal. Supposedly shes started letting campaign workers go. It saddens me that I wasn't able to personally share my memories of the Senator with more people. Find her more supporters. Her compassion and realness really touched me. When I spoke to her, she listened. I understand the inevitablity that she will not be the Democratic nominee. I've accepted that for weeks now. But seeing this campaign really begin to close up is really sad for me. Tomorrow night might not be the moment she throws her support behind Senator Obama, but I do believe it will be the first step towards that.

To RSVP for tomorrow's rally at the Baruch College Athletic Center, visit:
http://www.hillaryclinton.com/events/ticketed/20080603NewYork

RIP King Kong

2008-06-02T07:39:00.000-07:00

Above picture taken during my last trip to visit King Kong before his untimely death, Passover 2007

Yesterday I went to the Israel Day Parade where I'd hoped to bump into old friends who got married, had babies, and never called me again. True story. It was fun. Walked up and down the street people watching the day away. When I got home that evening I was greeted by this unfortunate news story. There was a major fire at Universal Studios Hollywood which destroyed many famous sets and backlots. Most notably (in my mind at least) the King Kong set. I really enjoy Universal Studios. Been there like 10-15 at least. The backlot tour is amazing! The take you up and down the hills in the backlot showing you where Psycho and Jaws and the new War of the Worlds was made. And then they drive you through sound stages. The tram driver alerts you that you are about to enter a stage with a calm NYC street. Nothing out of the ordinary. There is a helicopter overhead (just like in New York) and you see televisions on in the apartment windows (just like in New York). Then out of nowhere the helicopter crashes just beside the tram. And then theres a roar! And then King Kong appears just to the left of the car. And everyone screams. Women. Children. Most of the men. Its beyond exciting to be inches away from this gigantic beast. I've always gotten a kick out of this. Then at 4:30 on Sunday morning, Kong was wiped out by a fire. So sad. Also gone, the clock tower from all three Back to the Future movies. That was actually really nifty to see because you had you remember that even though it was the same exact set, it was doctored up to look like 1985, 1955, 2015, and 1885. It really showed a person like me how magical filmmaking could be. How something so ordinary (a gigantic beige sound stage) could become extraordinary. At least I have my memories. RIP King Kong.

Bearcats 1-1

2008-05-30T07:49:00.000-07:00

We won our game yesterday. It was like 16-7. I was on base 2 of 3 times. We played literally under the Queensborough bridge at York and 59th streets. If your hit connects with the bridge (about 300 feet above the field) it can be played by the fielders. If it drops its designated a foul ball. My team hit two balls off of the bridge. Seriously New York City Parks department, are there no other real fields on which we can play? I'm paying like $200 for this league and I risk being struck by rivets from an old bridge. Seriously?!

I made one awesome put out at first which I was really proud of. Our third baseman made a wild throw and I had to come off the base a few feet to stop it. Instead of hurrying back to the bag I instinctively threw my glove hand at the batter as he ran up the baseline toward first, tagging him out. The umps reaction when I came to bat in the next inning was, "Wow, looks like you've played this game before." The human body really is an amazing thing. When anyone has spent a significant amount of time doing any particular thing it can be done absolutley and completely without thinking. I find it so incredible. Not to say I'm like a pro or anything, cuz I'm not, but I have played this game for 23 years and some things just sink in in that amount of time.

Quote of the game: Overheard chick on the other team say, "Wow, I've only ever played this sport on my Wii." She hit 2-3 so I guess that game system really works.

Thanks Mom

2008-05-27T09:06:00.000-07:00

Today is the 37th day of the Omer. And it took this long for my mom to mail me the bra I left in Cali over Pesach. Thanks for being so on top of this Mom! Although, USPS Flat Rate boxes do have a good thing going for them. Since my bra doesn't quite fill a box the box, mom filled it with several Easter eggs. Most notably some new contact lens solution that just entered the marketplace and a copy of my Bat Mitzvah reception video. Get ready to see Susanne just months shy of her 13th birthday...and dealing with the worst bout of stomach flu in the history of man. But don't you worry, I made it through the Shabbat morning service and layning just fine. Ever see a black tie Bat Mitzvah reception (with a life size replica of Pop Tate's Choklit Shoppe!) where the lucky girl is completely missing from the festivities? Nows your chance! Viewings daily!!!

Krups Heineken BeerTender

2008-05-23T08:58:00.000-07:00

I will be registering for this. Oh yes, I will be registering for this.

Oh right! I'm engaged.

2008-05-23T06:52:00.000-07:00

After spending most of my 28 years as a single, its hard to transform from available hotty into spoken-for woman. Oooohh the Bangitout Lager B'Omer party is tonight! Oh right, I'm not on the prowl anymore, nix that from my calendar. Oooohh, theres a SawYouAtSinai Shabbaton at the end of the summer! Oh wait, I'm going home for my bridal shower that weekend. But this week I've spent a lot of time looking at pictures. We took over 200 at my engagement party last week. And let me be frank, I looked good! I wore a cute dress. Put on a bunch of makeup. I even let Reif comb my hair. So being the narcissist that I am, I've been staring at my pictures non-stop. And they're everywhere! FACEBOOK! ONLYSIMCHAS! MYSPACE! I'm so vain I can't get enough of them. But the worst is this. Throughout the week I've caught myself riffling through pictures thinking, damn, I look good. And when I come to one of my more striking pictures, the first thought that comes to my mind is wow, this will make an incredible Frumster headshot. Doh! When will my brain realize I'm single no more?

EAT THAT SIMON! DAVID COOK IS MY IDOL!

2008-05-21T18:59:00.000-07:00

I already had a message prepared here lambasting the American Idol judges for crowning Archuleta champion on last night's finale. That was right before Ryan announced DAVID COOK was the new American Idol winner. Moments prior Simon Cowell decided to apologize for coming down on Cook too hard last night. Well Simon, too little, too late I'd say. But STUFF IT! Your boy lost. American Idol voters, you've restored my faith in the next generation! And by 12 million votes, David Cook is officially THE MAN! Way to go my Little Cookie! Who else was waiting for Archuleta's dad's head to explode? Now THAT would have made my night!

I'm Engaged

2008-05-20T22:47:00.000-07:00

In case the word on the street hasn't reached you yet, I'm engaged. I, Susanne Michelle Goldstone will become Susanne Michelle Rosenhouse on December 28, 2008. My initials will go from SMG (smug) to SMR (smear). Not sure which is worse. I think they're both alright.

I apologize for the delay. Its taken me a week to post something on here. I've been ruminating a lot about what to say on here. In addition to the story of how this all went down, I'd also like to give you some thoughts about how I feel about simchas in general.

Now to preface, I'm not the type of girl who enjoys being the center of attention. Contrary to popular belief, I am pretty shy and having people singing, jumping, and dancing around me (literally) is not my cup of tea. That said, last Tuesday my boyfriend, now fiance (holy crap, thats like the first time I've uttered that aloud, well, not actually aloud, but still), and I became affianced.

Evan and I met on SawYouAtSinai. This is a Jewish dating site like no other. Instead of direct contact you have a shadchan or intermediary matchmaker set you up. Ours was Kim Davis Solomon. You may know her as Happy Kim. Kim was that girl in Stern who always had a smile on her face. She was always happy to see you. Always had an anecdote to cheer you up. Always made you a little bit happier. I tell my friends, "remember Kim Davis? She set us up." They go "who?" I go "Happy Kim." They go "ooooohhh HAPPY Kim, course we know her!" Point is, shes an incredible incredible person. So incredible that I sincerely believe that she is more happy about our engagement than both Evan and I put together (as if that's possible). I am so happy we were able to make her so full of joy and able to give this amazing woman the zechus (merit) of making our match.

As for the proposal which I know all my rabid female readers are waiting for, here goes. Was I suspicious that this was coming soon? Yes. It started over Pesach when I went to Dallas to meet my future in-laws. The day before I came to town Evan nonchalantly says, "so I went shopping today." I asked, "oh for a new suit?" "Nooo." "What then?" "Jewelry." "Oh..." Thank goodness the meeting went well. I get along with his family (at least the 90 of them that I met during my 3 day visit) and his grandparents LOVE me (its mutual, they are awesome!). :)

Evan asked me like a week earlier if I was free Tuesday night the 13th. I was like, um, we aren't the couple that makes plans in advance. We are mucho laid back. So that kind of tipped me off. He wanted to get tickets to the show I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change. Thats kind of random. He never mentioned the show before. Plus, he suggested we go to dessert after, something we've never done after a show. So I was super suspicious at this point. So I cancelled some plans I had with my girlfriend's on Tuesday and told Evan I would go to show on Tuesday. I passed up Smokey Joes's for you Evan. Now THATS love!

We went out on Tuesday and nothing was too weird. I suggested we get a bite to eat. We went to Le Marais one of our faves since you can get a good kosher steak for an affordable price. Then we were off to the show. Evan didn't seem nervous or do anything out of the ordinary. We then walked to the show. It was a small theater but a very fun show about the trials and tribulations of being single in this day and ago. The show ended and I noticed Evan didn't take a program at first. So I thought to myself, if he was really going to propose tonight, he probably would have taken that with him as a memento. I went to the bathroom which I always do after a show (I have the world's smallest bladder, honest, look in the Guinness book for my picture). While I was in there I remember berating myself thinking how lame I was to think it might be tonight. I left the bathroom and found the lobby empty of our fellow theatergoers. Only a couple ushers were left in the room. And Evan said, "Susanne, can I ask you something?" I was like, "Um, I guess." Then he went into a beautifully planned speech using the elements of the show and ending with the question of whether I'd like to CHANGE from his girlfriend to his wife. The last part was done on bended knee. After gratefully accepting and exchanging hugs to the ecstatic cheers of the two ushers, the first thing out of my mouth was, "my God Evan, what if the play ended badly and everyone decided to stay single?" I don't think he had thought of that part. I'm glad it ended the way it did. Happily.

Of course, being me, I needed photographic evidence of this occasion. So I asked Evan to reenact the proposal while the ushers greatfully snapped pictures. We made our requisite phone calls to our family and friends and ventured out to find a cab to take home. The subway would put us out of cell phone range for too long and our well wishes were pouring in.

We got back to my apartment to find that my roomy Sharon had decorated my door. Back in Stern there was a custom to decorate the door of the latest 20-year-old to get engaged, in order to make all the other girls on her floor feel inadequate. I always wanted one...but sadly, I graduated YU without my MRS degree. So Sharon made up for lost time. See video here.

My favorite part about this whole experience has been the outpouring of mazel tovs. I've haven't had a real mazel tov in my life since like my Bat Mitzvah. Or I guess my college graduation. I've been stagnant without a simcha for at least 6 years. Simchas bring people together. They help old friends reconnect. So far like 10 friends who I haven't seen or heard from in 5-10 years have either called me up, emailed me, or signed my guestbooks on OnlySimchas or Shmais. People I know well (and some even vaguely) have stopped me on the street to tell me how great they think I am and how highly they regard my friendship. They've told me memories they have and other positive things about me. But most importantly, they want to say how happy they are to hear about my simcha. My question is this: Why wait for a simcha? Why not tell your friends and companions everyday how much you care about them? Someone told me yesterday that she doesn't think she'll ever get a mazel tov. That saddened me so much. I challenge you all to treat others like they have simchas in their lives. Call someone you haven't spoken to in a while and reconnect. Do it now, because who knows when you'll get a chance.

Now folks, please feel free to hit me up for brachos. Brides and grooms apparently have superpowers where we have an open line to God. Ask and you shall receive. Take advantage of my generosity.

My heart is bursting with all the warm Mazel Tov wishes! I may not get back to all of you, but they mean the world to me. Thank you!

For more pics visit my Facebook photo galleries. Enjoy!

L'Chaim Gallery 1
L'Chaim Gallery 2
The Infamous Bucket of Cheesy Poofs

Who paid Simon Cowell?

2008-05-20T20:28:00.000-07:00

Oh Simon. David Archuleta didn't prove anything tonight. David Cook was the bomb on tonight's American Idol finale. For my boy Cook to win, I had to counter those rapid 13-year-old David Archuleta fans. I needed to fight fire with fire. So far, I've called David Cook's voting line IDOLS-05 about 25 times, and I'm still going. Although, not winning Idol isn't a death sentance, per say. Remember Chris Daughtry? Well, Chris, David Cook is on your heels. Get running!

You're Fired!

2008-05-12T20:50:00.000-07:00

Ho Boy! Well, maybe not fired...yet. But Sue Simmons dropped the F bomb tonight on her intro to the 11:00 news. I missed it! But have no fear, visit the blogosphere! Sure enough within like 20 minutes of her fateful curse numerous blogs had already commented on it and at least one posted the video. My life is now complete. Are we going to go back to the days where even news is tape delayed? Oy vey!

Frozen OJ and Little League

2008-05-12T10:20:00.000-07:00

Some of my fondest memories from growing up were of my Saturday mornings spent on the Seaview Little League diamond. I loved everything about it. Being chosen by my coach to recite the Little League pledge from the pitcher's mound. The words are so sacred and true that its awesome to think that boys and girls repeat this everyday. Some of the best moral objectives are included. See below:

I trust in God
I love my country and will respect its laws
I will play fair, and strive to win
But win or lose, I will always do my best

Also awesome: Getting a ticket for the snack bar after the game and getting Red Vines and Now & Laters. Getting my new uniform each year (Giants, Tigers, Orioles, etc) and being jealous of whoever was assigned to the Angels, our hometown team. Getting drafted into Minor A when all my friends were still in Minor B (okay, kinda sucky not being with friends, but cool to have my abilities acknowledged). Being the only girl on the team and still kicking the boy's butts.

And close to the top of my list of favorite memories was the annual pancake breakfast on opening day, and not just cuz I was the little chubby kid. Opening day was always amazing in general. But thie breakfast for some reason was always so much fun. Seeing all my friends again from different schools. Hanging with old buddies. Seeing former coaches. Here comes my odd segue. Today I ordered breakfast from around the corner and they delivered my egg and bagel with a small bottle of orange juice. I stuck it in the freezer to cool it off and forgot about it. When I went to take it out it was all slushy. Thats when the pancake breakfast and good times at Seaview popped into my head. For some reason, each year, the tiny little OJ containers were deliciously frozen. Of course, that morning was always freezing (69 degrees is considered freezing in Huntington Beach) but I was always excited to have the frozen OJ to go with my pancakes and bacon (yup, this was almost two decades before my kosher days).

So today's OJ made me fondly remember my Saturday's spent at LeBard field for my Seaview Little League games. Earlier this year the Huntington Beach City School District decided to sell LeBard school which is home to Seaview. When I was home for Passover I saw lawn signs everywhere around Huntington Beach. Instead of just toting support for Clinton, Obama, or McCain (mostly McCain, by the way, in Southern Orange County), people had "Save our Diamonds" signs on their front lawns.

One day during Passover 2008 I was driving down Brookhurst and passed the track where LeBard is located. So I decided to drive by, just in case my next time back in town the whole school is razed. Sadly, I didn't have a camera with me. There were games just starting this Friday afternoon. I first stopped at the Minor B field where a couple 10-year-olds were reciting the pledge. I kinda teared up a little. Then I went to watch the Minor A game where the Diamondbacks were in the lead. When I played, the Diamondbacks weren't even a farm team, now 12 kids had this team name emblazoned on their jerseys. On the Majors field they now have an announcer's booth with an announcer calling out the batters names and stats. All we had was our Team Mom keeping score. I am so old.

Today there is a "Save Seaview" website. Basically, I loved playing ball for Seaview. The fact that the school district wants to sell of the site where thousands of little boys and girls learned what it takes to "respect laws" and "play fair" is just infuriating. I implore you to visit the Save Seaview website and share your thoughts. Even if you didn't participate in Seaview. If you've ever had a kid in Little League somewhere, post a comment. If you think its just plain wrong, post a comment. I know this was a long ramble that started with a 10 ounce container of orange juice, but the importance should not be missed.

Jenna Bush Gets Married

2008-05-12T10:11:00.000-07:00

Mazel Tov! Theres nothing like when a couple meets, discovers similar political leanings, falls in love, and gets married. Its just so beautiful. Kinda like what happened with my friends (and couple I married #1) Mark and Sura. But they're on the other side of the political spectrum.

PS: Doesn't President Bush look dreamy...sigh...

David Archuleta Supporters are Big Babies

2008-05-08T14:05:00.000-07:00

Some babe (or really gay male) just verbally attacked me for putting down David Archuleta. Don't his fans have anything better to do with their time? Honey, when you graduate from middle school and have to deal with real world issues like picking out a prom dress (fyi: I was prom queen runner-up) you will understand that attacking a fellow human being who is using their right to free speech is pretty damn lame. And if you are going to do it, at least be eloquent and use spell check and punctuation.

To paraphrase:
"you know you jerks david is better than all of you and he is hott!!! he will be the next american idol...u guys dont have the right to put down david because you don't even know him soooo yea david will win and u guys will be bitches for the rest of ur life haaa superman that yeahhh i said it JERKS!!!!

The part taken out was a long tirade where this individual spent an hour calling me fat. Yeah, that adds validity to your conjecture.

P.S. What the hell does "superman that" even mean? Oy, kids today. Please God don't let this commenter be a 35 year old man...

DAVID COOK RULES!!!

The End is Near

2008-05-07T13:33:00.000-07:00

I am is voting for John McCain. No not really. I like him a lot. Hes a stand up dude. He came in 5th place on my list ranking presidential hopefuls last April behind Al Gore, Hillary, Bill Richardson, and John Edwards, respectfully. Only problem, hes a Republican and I just can't force myself to yank the level in their direction. I made that comment to express my disdain for the Democratic Electorate. You guys are comparable to the people who have been voting for Jason Castro week after week on American Idol. Complete imbeciles. Lets vote for the guy because hes so handsome and has such a nice smile (read: Obama). But not the chick who has the lung capacity to get the job done (read: Hillary, oh, and Carly Smithson for that matter). My Fellow Democrats, as we watch Hillary Clinton's campaign come to a complete stop, I'd like to take this time to admonish you. You suck.

My friend ES who happens to be more obsessed with Hillary than I commented this morning that he'd rather move to Mexico than vote for McCain or Obama. I corrected him and said "Dude, didn't you get the memo. We don't threaten to move to Mexico. Only Canada. I'll meet you in Montreal in November." Doesn't everyone read Stuff White People Like? Cuz they hit the nail on the head.

Anyhoo, as always, I hate being the buzzkill, but I am a realist. And in my mind, last night was my last hope of seeing Hillary take the presidency. So lets sit back and see where this journey now takes us.

David Archuleta Sucks Take 2

2008-05-06T19:12:00.000-07:00

So I just wanted to say how funny I find it that I write a blog about my disdain for that little Mousketeer David Archuleta and I patiently wait until American Idol airs on the East Coast. Each week at approximately 9:05 EST my blog post begins to get comments agreeing that David is an overrated twerp. Hundreds of people every week are Googling David Archuleta Sucks and Susanne's Blog is one of the first hits. I have never been so proud.

D Train

2008-05-06T07:27:00.000-07:00

Sorry to everyone who has bitched that I haven't been updating. A lot has been going on in my life lately and I barely find time to sleep, so blogging has been out of the question. I still hope to fill you in on my trip to Dallas over Pesach and Jury Duty, but first....

I came in a little early to work today. Tonight is opening day for my softball team the Bearcats and I need to leave early from work so I came in earlier than usual. I was fortunate enough to meet Zehavs for the first leg of my journey. Knowing that I dig her taste in music she gave me a listen to the Fine Frenzy, a group I totally plan to download when I get home tonight. We parted ways at 59th street and I got onto the D Train alone. I'm standing in the middle of the car for two stops. As the doors closed at Rockefeller Center a guy caught me eye. He's sitting there in a fricken facemask and gloves and was carrying a backpack which I noticed had big heavy duty locks on it. And not to rationalize, but he did have dark skin. And no, I'm not that racist guy or anything, but its something your brain takes into consideration when you are sitting next to a Unabomber wannabe. They say if you see something, say something. But I was like, no, I must be crazy. No one around me even notices the guy. Are New Yorkers so numb to the weirdness around them that THIS goes unnoticed? For goodness sake, its 75 degrees out today. There is no non-malicious reason to be wearing a skimask. I considered flagging down a cop at the next stop. But then I got all doubtful. What if he had some weird skin condition where he can't be exposed to light? Maybe he had some outrageous deformity? I don't know. I let him be. But not before getting off the train at the next stop. Even I'm not crazy enough to stay on with him all the way to 34th Street.

Susanne Goldstone Googlegängers

2008-04-10T09:36:00.000-07:00

If you run a search of "Susanne Goldstone" into Google you currently get 629 responses. I wrote a blog about my obsession with googling myself last year. The best part is that my name is unique so every single posting is actually about me. Not a Susanne Goldstone from Mequon, Wisconsin. Not Susanne Goldstone from Sedona, Arizona. ME! As I wrote last year, my name is Susanne, not the more common Suzanne, and Goldstone, not Goldstein. I'm not just tooting my own horn. I learned from the New York Times this morning that I'm not the only one. Its actually a scientific thing that people are "unconsciously drawn to people and things that remind us of ourselves." For instance, the article tells us about Sam Blackman who consistently checks up on the other Sam Blackman's of the world and sheps nachas whenever someone gets married, has baby, etc. Even though he doesn't know them, he feels a kinship because they share the same name.

I would love to find another Susanne Goldstone. With so many billions of people in the world, there must be one. So I am asking, if you are Susanne Goldstone, hit me up. I'd love to hear from you. You can be like the "sister" I never knew I had.

My Parents' Celebrity Sighting

2008-04-10T07:55:00.000-07:00

My parents flew in to New York last night from LA and the first thing they told me upon arrival was how many celebrities were sitting near them in First Class. Goldstones like to fly classy (Thank G-d for miles!). Next to them was Alec Baldwin sitting with one of his brothers. Unfortunately my mom is not a celebrity gossip extraordinaire and couldn't identify whether it was Billy, Stephen, or Daniel who accompanied Alec. Had it been Billy, I would have accidentally faked turbulence and fallen into his lap. "Whoops, sorry Billy, planes make me clumsy. Why don't you take off your shirt and let me apply seltzer to that wine spill I made." :D

Sitting in front of my parents was Marilyn Manson. My mom was shocked by his "scary eyes" and my dad was like, "How does that dude walk in 5 inch platform shoes?" At 6'3" and with 5" heels, I wonder how the heck he fit on the damn plane. Plus, he'd probably block the movie screen which would piss me off. If I can't watch "The Nanny Diaries" I swear I'll just scream! Why is it that I never see any cool celebs when I travel? The most famous person I ever sat next to in First Class was Dr. Bernard Lander, founder of Touro's Lander College. I even offered him some of my kosher meal since he forgot to order one. If I die with THAT being my claim to fame it will just be so sad.

Funniest Geek EVER?

2008-04-08T07:51:00.000-07:00

Jack McBrayer was beyond hysterical as the sexually inept newlywed in the hilarious upcoming comedy Forgetting Sarah Marshall (which basically includes my entire dream cast, btw). He is the funniest thing about "30 Rock", a show that I love (so thats really saying something considering my undying love for both Tina Fey AND Alec Baldwin). A lot of people think hes going to be typecast by playing the same bumbling yet warmhearted nitwit in each role he takes on. But Jack, I have this advice for you, KEEP IT UP! Never has nerd chic been so enticing. We love you! If you need more proof. Watch the above video for Mariah Carey's 'Touch My Body'. HYSTERICAL! I will watch anything this guy is in. Love it!

Look what I found

2008-04-07T10:12:00.000-07:00

Guess who found their favorite ever alcoholic beverage at a Midtown Gristedes? Okay, maybe its my second favorite alcholic drink, but you can't just find an Adios Motherf*&#er on a grocery store shelf near you. Hornsby's is the drink I grew up on. When I was too much of a wuss in high school to drink Jack Daniels like the Soccer Bums, and turned off by the taste of Boone's Strawberry Hill after witnessing my friend Maggie puke up a bottle of it sophomore year, I turned to Hornsby's Hard Cider. Delish, goes down easy, and had a low alcohol percentage so I wouldn't get embarrassingly wasted (okay, not as often at least). Its like my Holy Grail. I search for it in every liquor store and supermarket I walk into. I was leaving a movie screening at Kip's Bay on Thursday night and walked by my old apartment in the Windsor building. And a lightbulb flashed over my head. Had I once seen Hornsby's tucked a way in a corner of the beverage aisle at the Gristedes there. I went to investigate and lo and behold. There is was. Grail has been unearthed. What should I turn my search towards now? World peace?

Best Bush Picture EVER

2008-04-06T11:05:00.000-07:00

I can't get enough of this. This is a picture of President Bush with all the leader's of NATO member countries in Bucharest, Romania posted in the NY Times on Friday. Stared at it for like 10 minutes on the subway on Friday afternoon and talked about it all Shabbos. I love the look on our President's face. I love all the hustle and bustle around him as he just stands there. I love that he's in the middle of the nations, yet doing nothing. Metaphor? Hmmm....

Maternity Cocktail Dress?

2008-04-04T07:13:00.000-07:00

Someone posted on the Washington Heights message boards seeking a maternity cocktail dress. I don't mean to pry, but should she really be drinking? Har har. Those Corny Rabbi Joke classes are really paying off.

GOOD PEOPLE DAY (GPD08)!!!!

2008-04-03T10:39:00.000-07:00

There is an internet movement advocating today as "Good People Day". Gary Vaynerchuk wrote and recorded a video on his blog yesterday asking for people to spend one day, it should of course be everyday, but just spend one day putting out good vibes, talking about the good attributes in people. You go to a site like TMZ and a majority of the stories are about the troubles and travails of our favorite celebrities. Can you imagine the power of the media (and yes, I am including myself, a mere blogger, as an adjunct member of the media at large) if they only talk about the good things people do. Just for one day? I realize there are more stories posted about Britney's constant custody disputes than there are about Hayden Panettiere saving dolphins and the like, but seek out these Good stories and share them with the world. They are out there. Dig deeper!

And now to get all religious on you. In this week's Torah Portion, Tazria, Rabbi Ephraim Buchwald from the National Jewish Outreach Program (NJOP) says in his weekly message "According to rabbinic tradition, the "tzah'ra'aht" (leprosy) affliction is not a bodily disease, but a physical manifestation of a spiritual illness that results from "lashon hara," speaking evil about others. Its purpose is to show gossipers and defamers that they must mend their ways and cease their inappropriate speech." I wonder if Gary realized the connection of speaking good about others in this week's portion when choosing the date of his campaign. Whether or not, brilliantly done!

I encourage you to take the idea of GPD08 and make it a daily occurence in your life. And I'll do a better job of doing it in mine.

Tonight I was robbed...

2008-03-31T19:53:00.000-07:00

Tonight a few things happened that left me short of breath.

A) I have a new stalker. Sorry Diana. The competition is getting stiffer.

B) I finished Veronica Mars, and it was a huge let down. Heres a run down of the last 24 hours as I made my way through the final episodes of the series, collected from my Facebook Status Updates on the subject.

Sunday afternoon: Trying to get through a few more eps of Veronica Mars before leaving for the circus. Will season 3 ever get good? Only 2 discs left!

Monday, 5:00 PM: Running a temperature and counting the minutes until I can go home and finish Season 3 of Veronica Mars

Tonight I got home around 7:00 PM and immediately put in disc 6, the final disc in my Season 3 booklet, the final season of like the best ever series on television. The disc loads. I'm already itching for the final episode or two to begin. But alas, disc 6 was nothing but Extras! Not one episode on it! I didn't watch "The Bitch is Back" episode thinking, okay Susanne, prepare yourself for crying. The end of an era must be celebrated with tears. Tear of joy. Tears of sadness. But there must be tears. I'm such a wuss. I've spent months obsessed with this television show. I've added Veronica Mars to your list of heroes, right next to Mitch Hedberg and Hillary Clinton. And shes fictional!! The last ep (which I had to rewatch by the way because it was so damn unremarkable) was like, la dee dah, Veronica walks out of a voting booth. No mystery. No intrigue. The first two seasons had blockbuster finales. A murder was solved, another question was asked. If I'd know that was it for Ronnie I would have been like, WTF! Are you kidding me? Thats it?!! Instead I was like, that episode was boring. It ended and I thought, tomorrow I'll finish the series and it'll be awesome. Rob Thomas the creator never let me down before. No. That feeling of awesomeness was stolen from me. Now I'll need to start from scratch and emotionally prepare myself correctly for the moment when the show ends. First ep, VM cuts Wallace off the flag pole. Let the games begin. Zehava tells me I can't blame Rob. Its the nonexistent television audience that never watched the show that was blamed for its downfall. But dude, the least he could have done was ended with a real zinger. A rapist hiding in the voting booth? Lily Kane's ghost standing at the door of the polling station to comfort Veronica? Dick the dick shows up with roses and professes his undying love for Veronica? So many awesome options. Rob? Why'd you disappoint me so? Harumph! There was an easter egg on disc 6. I'll give him that. The proposal of season 4, if CW network had given them another season. It was pretty fun to watch. But at the same time, it was a total sell out. Rob made it into just another girl at the FBI show. Veronica looked like the blond chick from Cold Case in her blue pantsuit. I know he wanted season 4 to have a chance at survival by reinventing it as your typical detective show, but honestly, it sullied my memory a little bit. I really feel robbed of that warm fuzzy feeling I had when watching my other favorite shows come to an end. I remember watching the West Wing and Dawson's Creek finales, other shows I was emotionally involved in end. This was a disappointment. Ronnie, you let me down.

Celeb sighting #1

2008-03-27T21:26:00.000-07:00

Can you guess which celebrity couple shared my subway car this evening? I'll give you a hint. I was standing about one degree away from them. I was desperate to talk to them, or ask for autographs, or snap a picture... But nooooooo, Reifer wouldn't allow me to. Something about me always making a scene on the subway. She lies. Believe it or not, I've never really had one of these chance encounters with celebrities that everyone in New York talks about. So this was mucho exciting for me. I could barely contain myself. I wonder if they thought I was cool. I sure hope so.

Stop-Loss

2008-03-27T21:18:00.000-07:00

Just saw the movie tonight at a free screening. It was pretty amazing. The state of being that our soldiers are coming back from this war is absolutely heartbreaking. We were in tears the entire movie. We need to get out of Iraq ASAP! At least there was eye candy. Ryan Phillipe and Channing Tatum (who is shirtless for a good portion of the movie's beginning!) are gorgeous! HOOAH!

David Archuleta Sucks!

2008-03-26T09:58:00.000-07:00

Ooooh, I'm just waiting for the Susanne bashing to begin. I read a review in New York Magazine's online edition about last night's Idol performance. And they LOVE David Archuleta. I still haven't gotten on the boat. Just like the message I have for my Obamaphile friends, I'm just not ready to go there. So I posted the below comment after reading the article that I thought I'd share:

"I am still not figuring out the whole David Archuleta obsession. I admit he has a pretty voice. But this is voting for the whole package and I ain't voting for a kid that doesn't even know who wrote some of the songs he sings or the fact that "Another Day in Paradise" is not a happy song (its about homelessness you moron, not a vacation at Atlantis). David Cook is the one I think is a star. Even though everyone keeps claiming he's steailing arrangements from other groups. What he's done with his latest performances (Eleanor Rigby, Billie Jean) has been brilliant. Like when Brooke White did Love Is a Battlefield as a ballad. Amazing! It would have been perfect in my book if she didn't do basically the same exact performance every single week. Good season so far. I'm waiting until the day when Archuleta loses it and runs off stage. That'll be the day."

As soon as David Cook loses his flock of seagulls haircut, I think he'll be going places.

The Panic Years?

2008-03-24T08:13:00.000-07:00

The Panic Years: A Guide to Surviving Smug Married Friends, Bad Taffeta, and Life on the Wrong Side of 25 without a Ring by Doree Lewak.

I know what you are thinking. Susanne recommending a book? She doesn't even read! Well thats a complete lie. I do read. I've got a pile of Archie comics and People magazines stacked up in my bathroom. Well, when I come across a book that is worth reading I feel the need to tell you to check it out. We all know what its like. You are best friends with this girl. They meet a guy, get married, and you never hear from them again. They become that smug married girl that they promised you they'd never become when you sat in their dorm room listening to details after the couple's third date. I'm not bitter. I am happy for all my friends that accidently lost my phone number when they got married and started popping out babies. I just feel sorry for them that they no longer get to experience the awesomeness that is Susanne. I shouldn't generalize. I still see a bunch of them. We meet up for dinner. I go for Shabbos. I love their kids (I am a Savvy Auntie after all)! All in all, its good to have a book where someone else says the things that all of us single ladies in our late 20s and 30s are thinking (ie Chapter 4: How not to be bitter at your friends' weddings). This should be some good reading. I ordered my copy today!

Side story: I met Doree a couple years ago at a focus group for the Jewish dating website Frumster (thats a story for another blog post altogether). Also in attendance was William Levin writer of one of my favorite comic strips about a Jewish Robot, Shabot 6000. I know telling you that I met them there might harm their street cred, but so be it. When I first heard she was writing this book I was excited. It'll be interesting to see how this spunky girl deals with the ridiculousness of New York City dating. And after reading the first chapter "Confessions of a Panicker" I am excited to see whats next. Might Doree be the Carrie Bradshaw that us Stern grads living in Washington Heights and the Upper West Side have been looking for? I'm starting to think so.

****My copy arrived today. I'm so excited to get reading. My mom would be so proud!****

Twitter

2008-03-13T15:47:00.000-07:00

So I'm trying to figure out this Twitter business. Everyones using it and everyone swears by it. So I'm giving it a shot. I was WAY behind with MySpace (Jen, one of my least tech savvy friends first told me about it, bad sign from the start) and years behind with Facebook. I wasn't even in college when I signed up (I was 25) and never heard of a facebook. Yeshiva University has a kind of facebook type of thing where all the students' pictures are posted in one spot, but they prefer to call it Frumster. So I've signed up for Twitter (search for me, my name is susqhb). Hopefully, I'm on my way to getting ahead in this tech savvy world. Next step-taking over the universe. First step in taking over the universe- helping to write the Mount Sinai Purim Shpiel to be presented without interruption on March 20th, one week from tonight. If you thought my Frumster joke was funny, you ain't seen nothing yet.

Winner Takes All

2008-03-04T23:06:00.000-08:00

Okay, so tonight I did what might be the most loserish thing of my life. I've been thinking for a while about the campaign of John McCain. The Republican party's primary set up is a winner takes all event. If a candidate wins the popular vote in the state, they carry every single one of the state's delegates. Thats why Senator McCain has already accumulated enough delegates to be the presumptive nominee for his party even with Mike Huckabee hanging on and stealing a good chunk of votes in many of the states. The Democrats on the other hand, have this lame, convuluted set up where the votes get carved up depending on which districts you won within the state. So like the disturbing 2000 election, there is the possibility that the less popular candidate will win the majority of delegates. So I started thinking, what if the Dems had a winner take all set up? So I dorkily created a Google Spreadsheet and inputted the numbers. And I was shocked. If the states that Hillary won were not divvied between her and Barack Obama, Hillary would be leading Obama by more than a thousand delegates! If we include the state of Ohio (which was just projected an hour or so ago) and Rhode Island, she'd currently have 1,476 delegates. Shes currently ahead in Texas. If she takes that her total would be 1,704. Wait, heres another doozy. If the votes counted from the Michigan and Florida primaries (which Hill won by huge margins) she'd be up to 2,070!! Now lets look at Barack Obama. Including the ridiculously liberal state of Vermont which he won tonight, he would only control 967 delegates!!! Thats a difference of 1,103! Why are the pundits not pointing this out? I know its a moot point. Its not the case, so why point out. But seriously. You cannot win the general election as the Democratic nominee unless you are immensely popular in the states that count. Hillary is the one winning the BIG states. California, New York, Massachusetts, Florida (if it was counted, damn DNC!). Shes the most popular Democratic candidate in these states. States that are must wins for the Democratic candidate for President. 6 of Obama's 14 wins were in states that are almost definitely red states come November. Some of the most ardent Democratic friends of mine are already predicting a McCain win in '08. Why? Because Obama may win the Democratic candidacy. And no matter how badly we must keep a Republican out of the next White House, McCain will beat Obama. McCain versus Clinton? He doesn't stand a chance.

Everyones a Little Bit Racist

2008-02-29T12:08:00.000-08:00

Its true. I doesn't mean we go out committing hate crimes or anything as noted in the Avenue Q song entitled "Everyones a Little Bit Racist". And even the most tolerant person has moments of being judgemental of a particular minority. Well folks, one blogger created a site that is, I guess, self mocking. Stuff White People Like I can only guess is written by some white dude or chick, because it is pretty darn accurate. My favorite post so far is entitled #75 Threatening to Move to Canada (which is coincidentally where gay Rod's "girlfriend" Alberta lives in Avenue Q).

***DISCLAIMER***
I am not racist.

Bitch is the New Black

2008-02-25T13:30:00.000-08:00

Get it while its there. Will be taken down by NBC Universal in the very near future. Tina Fey exhorts why Hillary should be the next President. Her defense, shes a bitch. But you know what, bitches get stuff done. Thats right. Bitch is the New Black!

*UPDATE*

"And like that, (s)he's gone." Just one hour after posting, the clip was removed. NBC Universal can kiss my tuchus. Okay, now you have to go to the official site to view the vid. Here you go. The Clinton bit is about a minute and a half in. Enjoy!

Things I learned from being on Cable News

2008-02-18T14:24:00.000-08:00

Last night I took part in a Frank Luntz focus group, which turned out to be a live taping for You Decide 2008 on the Fox News Channel. It was an altogether awesome experience, thank you very much. Although, Frank is a die hard Republican pollster (which I should hate), the dude knows his stuff and I respect him for that. This focus group was very well picked. 29 people, a third leaning Republican, a third independent, a third leaning Democrat. None were 100% convinced who they will vote for this election. I've said before, I support Hillary. But if she doesn't win the nomination I will strongly consider John McCain. We were asked to support our decisions. When the dude next to me, a registered Democrat but voting Republican this year, said that the Dem candidates haven't impressed him, they are both being wishy washy, making speeches and false promises, I offered a rebuttal. Yes, there is a Democratic candidate that has stepped up, and thats Senator Clinton. As she said over the weekend, speeches are great, but they don't fill up your gas tank, fixing the economy does that (a direct attack on Obama and his lofty speeches). Plus, she has the experience to get these things done. That was basically my only sound bite of the night, but I think it was a good one. ;) GO HILL!! Here's the clip of me speaking up:

There was also a special guest on the show, none other than the Former Mayor of Cinncinati, Jerry Springer. THIS. DUDE. RULES. Earlier in the taping, before we know of his appearance, Frank told us to feel free to get rowdy and argue your points with other audience members. I was like, yeah, I'm going to pick up my chair and get all Jerry Springer on you. So when he came out, I was fired up. You can see me on camera, as soon as they announce the surprise guest was from Cincinnati I almost jumped out of my chair. I was like, dude, we were just talking about you. I got to shake his hand later. I was like Jerry, you are the man. I'm not ever washing this hand again. I tried to start a chant, JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! Apparently, chanting is frowned upon at the Fox News Channel. The host at one point joked during commercial, that Jerry is here to announce he is running for Senate. I was truly intrigued by this idea. Hell, if Al Franken has a shot...

I learned two things tonight. One political. One, um, not so much.

1) Independents and Republicans, much like me, don't believe a word that Obama has to say. This is not a positive thing come general election if he is our nominee. There were several Obama supporters in the room, but not one of them could articulate why he should be the nominee. Not one could define what the Senator meant when he said change. Its one thing to jump on the bandwagon and blindly vote, but come on people. Its like in 2000 when all my friends voted Bush simply because their Rabbi got up one Shabbos and said, Bush is the best candidate for Israel, and everyone in the congregation believed him. Any candidate this year, Democrat or Republican, Hillary or Barack, John on Mike, they ALL will support Israel. Israel is mucho importante to the USA and no Pres will blow that.

There was a question asked today on the Fox News (right leaning) website that quantifies the point. Does Barack Obama's campaign rhetoric have substance behind it?
No (58%)Yes (35%)Don't know (6%). Like me, these folks believe he's talking the talk, and not prepared to walk the walk.

2) Frank asked the question, you're so lucky to be here, what else would you be doing on a Sunday night? The very straight, college professor type to my right was like, um, sit on the couch and watch the L Word. Right on my friend. I've always been a little embarrassed to admit my affinity to this show since well, its about a bunch of lesbians living in LA. Not that anyone should doubt the fact that I'm totally into dudes, I drool over Brad Pitt like any other red blooded female and have a boyfriend of my own. But theres still that fear of stigma to watch the show. But, as I've said many times, its one of the funniest shows on TV. The Single White Female stalker thing thats going on now between Jenny and her assistant Adelle is more comical than homicidal. So now I have learned, many straight Americans (Republicans I might add) love this show as much as I. Phew!

ROCK THE VOTE PEOPLE!

Baruch Dayan Emes

2008-02-11T01:00:00.000-08:00

I just received a Breaking News Alert from JTA that Tom Lantos has passed away. He was 80. I wrote about his retirement from congress just last month due to sickness. He was a longtime crusader for Jewish issues during his time spent in congress. I hope that his family finds consolation in the fact that he used his position for good and helped thousands of people throughout the United States and abroad. May God console his family among the other mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.

Am I Crazy?

2008-02-06T17:16:00.000-08:00

I know its crazy but as I read my glorious NY Times on the subway this morning I had an epiphany. We need a Clinton/Obama ticket! I know. I can't believe the thought slipped out of my brain. But how amazing would that be? This would ensure that we will have an incredible President in the White House for the next 16 years. Heres my take. I love Obama. But I do not think he's ready for the White House. As I've said before, I find experience to be one of my strongest tugs when choosing a candidate. I think Clinton is ready, Obama is not. But don't get me wrong. I am incredibly inspired by this guy. Have you heard this speech? I've said many times I plan to vote for him in 8 years. Even on my account I voted NO to Will there be a Clinton/Obama or Obama/Clinton Ticket? I know that there is a lot of animosity between the two of them but they must broker a deal and make this happen. Look at the votes collected last night. It was like the 2000 Presidential election in that Hillary won the popular vote in many of the big states (CA,NY, MA) but Obama was drawing more people from the larger urban areas and therefore scored almost as many delegates. Obama took almost the entire midwest while Hillary scored some southen states. Together they are unbeatable. I think either of them separate may fall to Senator McCain. I like this even more than my previous favorite, the Clinton/Richardson ticket. Would I vote the other way? An Obama/Clinton ticket. See that I don't know. Right now, Americans are open to the idea of a female president, but I don't know how open they would be to a 69 year old female president (her age in January 2016). That could hurt the Democrats when that time comes. Look at John McCain. This dude has stellar credentials. But hes like 72 and people are scared he's going to keel over in the Oval. And God Forbid he chooses Huckabee as his running mate (my current Predictify prediction). No more anti-semites in the White House. Thats my policy. I apologize for all my poli talk. I know. I'm usually way funner than this. I just needed to share this amazing revelation with all of you...

Why I'm Voting Hillary

2008-02-05T02:21:00.000-08:00

I know there'll be no time in my schedule to write this tomorrow. Crazy day with many many things to take care of before the NJOP dinner. But in about 7 hours I will be walking down to the Holy Rood Church on 179th street and pulling the level of freedom. Tomorrow, I will be voting in person for the first time in 10 years. Since I've been 18 I moved to New York for college and regrettably haven't moved back. I retained my California voting eligibility and have voted absentee ever since. Why you may ask? Well, my Congressman in the 46th district of California is in my eyes a pretty huge anti-semite, so I like to stick it to him every two years when he's up for re-election. You know those Israel bills in Congress that are voted in favor of by 430 members of the House, and against by 5. Yeah, hes one of the 5. But this year, someone I am very passionate about is running for President and I wanted to physically walk into my neighborhood polling station and give her a shout out. I'm of course talking about Hillary Clinton.

I know, I know. You hate her. I'm aware of that. Have you ever met her? Sat down and had a conversation? Well I have. And I can honestly say I haven't been more impressed by someone in my life. I've met other politicians before. But when you are in the room with her, you know she is taking in what you have to say, thinks about it and gives you a solid, honest answer. Theres a story I want to share with you. My buddy Sari was a political machine while in Stern College. She organized a huge Rally to DC. She was my roommate when we did the OU internship in DC. She volunteered for the mayoral campaign (not for Giuliani). She called one night and asked if I wanted to volunteer at an intimate Hillary event. We got to a restaurant on the Upper East Side and helped out at an event for about 100 people. Afterward they asked if one of us could accompany the team to a small after party at a donor's home. Little did I know this was for only about 20 people in a gorgeous UES penthouse (overlooking the park). I went since Sari had plans later that night. Hillary arrived and was introduced to everyone. Including this horrible host lady's servants (who BTW she was incredibly kind to, even while weirded out that this lady had servants in her home). After working the room and spending a great deal of time speaking to everyone individually, including myself, she announced that she had to leave, she was on the red eye to Israel that evening. What you are about to read is possibly the biggest regret of my life. Are you ready? Okay, here goes... Hillary was saying her goodbyes to everyone. I got the idea that I really wanted to give her shliach mitzvah gelt. When someone is travelling, especially to Israel, some people have the custom to give that person some tzedakah, money to give to charity when they arrive, thereby making them a part of my mitzvah and essentially helping ensure a safe trip as your shliach, your messenger to deliver the tzedakah. Whether that is the true definition I don't know, but that is how I view it. I wanted to do this because A) I always try to give someone going to the Holy Land, and B) I knew Hillary would sincerely be touched by my proposition. Although, I was a little scared someone would shout a picture of me slipping money to my Senator. Especially with all the heat in '01 about soft money. But alas, as she worked her way through the room towards me, I became totally starstruck. She remembered my name (from hours earlier) and all I could squeek out was "I really admire you and your daughter". At least thats all I can remember. If I had a list of 10 do-overs in my life, this would be one of them. What a cool story that would be.

I'm not going to tell you to vote for Hillary just because I am. I'm not going to tell you to vote for her because there won't be another viable female candidate for at least another 20 years (when I plan to start running for office). I'm not going to tell you to vote for her because we would get to have my favorite former President again living in the White House. I'm going to tell you to vote for her because she is the right candidate. I am a strong believer in voting for the person with the best experience and the person who can lead this country in the right direction. Those are the two qualities I find most important in a President and shes number one on my list (because Al Gore isn't running, otherwise she might be number 2). We have been going downhill ever since Bush's dad's Supreme Court gave him the White House. We need to take this country back and move it in the right direction. And Hillary's the girl who will get us there. The odds are in favor of Obama taking the nomination but I'm not ready to jump on that bandwagon and throw him my vote. I believe in Hillary Clinton.

Addendum
I just got back from voting. It was really hard. I didn't know what to do. I had to ask the poll watcher for help. I did learn something though. You know how candidates that have already dropped out of the race end up getting 1% of the vote...its cause they are still on the ballot. People probably see that and go, hmmm Bill Richardson, I thought he dropped out, but hey hes still on here so I must be mistaken. Also, WTF are all those other names doing on the ballot? I swear there were like 100 names on there. I thought this was just the presidential primary...there should be like 6 names on the darn board. Do we really have to have the names of everyone who endorsed the various candidates listed on the ballot as well? How confusing. I consider myself a pretty intelligent person, and frankly I was kind of embarrassed at how much trouble I had understanding this process. Plus, I was DYING to get one of those "I VOTED" stickers and they totally weren't giving them out. Sooooo sad!

As I left my polling station I began to tear up. I didn't think this would make me so emotional but it did. This is democracy in action people. Not taking advantage of this incredible gift is one of the biggest mistakes anyone can make. Rock the Vote people!!! And remember, Friends don't let friends Vote Republican!

Things I Hate: Round 2

2008-01-31T10:21:00.000-08:00

Nothing makes me angrier than when someone steals my NY Times in the morning. The worst is on the weekends. If you don't snag yours before 10 am someone in my building just assumes I don't want it and takes it for themselves. Lately, I've just taken it with me to shul on Saturday mornings. Its always good to have something to read during the Rabbi's sermon, but I'd prefer to leave it at my apartment building and have it waiting for me when I get home after lunch. On weekdays, when someone snags my paper I am forced to pick up a NY Post from the bodega at the corner. Is it just me or does everyone judge people who read the Post? Its not a real newspaper. I'm convinced that they have employed a junior high school newspaper club to write their articles. They have that certain junior high ring to them. Anyway, as I sat on the subway reading my 25 cent NY Post I felt like everyone was staring at me thinking, oy, she looks so intelligent, yet shes reading the Post. We were so wrong to assume she was brilliant. Does anyone else feel that way?

Oh, and another thing to piss off all my reader's who are obsessed with Obama. The Post chose him as their candidate of choice today. Right next to a big article about a black cop who was running an under age prostitution ring. Not really an endorsement he's going to tout.

BIG NEWS

2008-01-30T17:51:00.000-08:00

Susanne is looking forward to sharing her BIG news with the WORLD! Soon soon my friends! And no, its not what you people who pounced on me upon seeing on the Facebook Newsfeed "Susanne is no longer single" are thinking. This news is work related. And its HUGE! Get ready to virally spread the word to all of your favorite Jewish peeps, blogs, and websites. And since I am talking about work, I'm happy to announce that my blog has a new #1 fan. Sorry Diana. My boss, Rabbi Rosenbaum, was forwarded a link to my blog and hasn't stopped talking about it. Thanks Melanie for passing it on. Really, thanks... I'm glad I've always kept things on here strictly kosher. ;)

Ahh Bushie

2008-01-28T18:23:00.000-08:00

I love the State of the Union Address. Not only does it come with its very own drinking game, but its also the one day of year the the United States congress gets to act like the British House of Commons. I love all the hooting and hollering. I'll update you on my drinking game progress as we go.

The doors open and the Sergeant-at-Arms says Madam Speaker. I still get excited when I hear that. Madam Speaker. Its only the second time he opened with that. She became Speaker just 20 days prior to last years SOTU address. Last year I teared up. Hmm, next year, Madam President? We shall see.

Now heres the low down on his address based on my drinking.

Oh, spotted my congressman, Charlie Rangel, drink one and pat yourself on the back for being able to identify your congressman/woman.

Did the President just mention Hispanish students? Oy. Bushism, have a drink.

Another Bushism so soon? I think I hear Nukular.

Ted Kennedy...sleeping. Drink until your liver cries. 5 minutes later. Ted again. Opening beer number 3.

Showing a current presidential candidate. Theres Hillary in her snazzy red pantsuit. There she is again. And again. Damn, Obama should have worn a red suit. He sitting next to Ted yet the camera hasn't once panned over. Does MSNBC favor Senator Clinton?!

President introduces an energy goal. Take a shot.

Earmarks! Tug on your ear while taking a drink. I wish he had said pork barreling instead. Then we'd get to oink.

Border security? Tequila time!

Buy produce from farmers in developing countries. This isn't a drinking point but still. Um hello, what about our US farmers? Doesn't the president read my blog? Sheesh!

Some guy sitting behind the first lady is clapping with one hand. Only person I know who does that is Bob Dole, but what the heck would he be doing there. Oh, now the Prez is talking about Bob Dole's recommendations to reform our veteran system, care for wounded warriors. It is him! Bob Dole is back people! Take a swig of Pepsi!

Prez has finished his address and is leaving the hall. Ouch, he just ignored Obama's hand not once but twice.

Ted kennedy again, this time with his son, Congressman Patrick Kennedy (a stand up dude BTW, used to see him in the visitor's dining room in the Capitol instead of the Member's only room. I alway dug that.)

President just outside the Chamber giving openly gay Rep. Barney Frank and warm half hug hello. Hmm, thats a guy I didn't envision him being all touchy feely with.

My thoughts on the speech overall. Eh. He didn't say much. Looks like this just might be a Lamer Duck than we expected. He was practically endorsing John McCain. What with all his talk about supporting the troops, getting rid of earmarks, etc... gee, I wonder who hes voting for?

And finally, who is this chick giving the Democratic response? The Governor of Kansas? Shes not even up for re-election. What the hell was she doing there? At least let someone cool speak. Like Jim Webb last year was so badass.

Anyhoo, those are my comments. I drank three beers and am now eating vanilla pudding. It is yummy.

Heath Ledger's Passing

2008-01-27T20:58:00.000-08:00

Heath died last Tuesday afternoon. I found out when I refreshed my Facebook Home screen and saw that Seth Galena had mentioned his passing as his Status Update. That was at 4:56 PM, only two hours after he was pronounced dead. Hell, Heath's family members may not even have heard in that amount of time. And then the stories began pouring out in the media. He OD'ed. He committed suicide. He was surrounded by pills. Or my favorite, he was found lying on the floor naked. People, come on. He was found by his masseuse and housekeeper lying in bed. When they tried to rouse him they realized there was trouble. When the EMTS arrived they took him out of the bed and put him on the floor. There were pills in the room. All prescribed and in their correct pill bottles. The way the media convoluted the story made us all think he was found sprawled out on his bedroom floor with pill capsules around his body. Let the man die with a little dignity. The meds he did have (sleeping pills, anxiety medication), hell thats stuff that almost every New Yorker has a prescription for. It doesn't mean if you have it you abuse it. I'd prefer to not accuse him of abusing drugs and overdosing. This is the dude that when in the tabloids it wasn't partying and acting stupid. He was the guy carrying his two-year-old daughter on his shoulders. Drinking coffee at a cafe. Ordering water at a club. Some people just die. Untimely as it might be, it does happen. When you're not a doctor you don't know if your sleeping pill might not be good to take if you have a cold. Your anxiety medicine might have a bad interaction with grapefruit juice (true story, by the way). He may have had a heart defect. Who the hell knows. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt here. It might bite me in the behind if test results come back positive of anything not kosher. But this guy really touched me with some of his roles. He was in several of my favorite movies. I still remember which theater I saw 10 Things I Hate About You at, who I saw it with, and where we went for a bite to eat after. That was 9 years ago. Silly as it seems, I really dug it. I wanted to write all this pent up annoyance all week but I just couldn't find the time. Then today I was flipping channels and I saw that Brokeback Mountain was on. Its the first time I saw him on screen since he passed away. He was so damn talented and had decades left of creativity in him that we are never going to see. That made me very sad. Only a couple actors each generation have that gift. And we just lost one. Rest in Peace Heath.

My Safari

2008-01-22T00:48:00.000-08:00

I went to a liquer tasting on my cruise with my parent's last year and tried a delicious drink called Amarula. I realized later it wasn't kosher but the one opportunity I had it was incredible. When I went to their website to check their kashrus status I signed up for all their mailing lists. I randomly got in the mail last month a holiday gift of an Amarula apron. Really super cool. I got an email today about entering a raffle to win an African safari. I like contests so what the hey, I entered.

The contest is as follows: Ever dreamt of a journey to Africa? Or witnessing majestic elephants in the wild? Submit a special moment and if it’s selected as the ultimate Amarula moment, you could win a trip to Africa. What is an Amarula moment? Any special memory that's cause for celebration. Share yours, and you could be packing your bags!

So I wrote about the trip I was on when I first tasted their delicious drink. And made it sound all sappy to win the contest. Below is my entry.

Being in my late 20s and having my parents in their 60s I realize that I unfortunately don't have too many opportunities left to go on vacation with both of my parents. Not that they God Forbid are getting too old (they are both "Recycled Teenagers" after all), but we do not often have vacation breaks at the same time of year. Last winter they offered to take me along on their grand cruise of the Eastern Carribean and I quickly accepted. It was 11 joyful days that we got to spend together. This picture was taken on the picturesque beach in the Cayman Islands. I look forward to the next opportunity we have to travel the world together. Perhaps to a kibbutz in Israel, the Eiffel Tower in Paris, or an exhilirating African Safari (hint, hint!). Although the best vacation might just be sitting on the couch at my parent's house in California. There's nowhere else I'd rather be...

I'll let y'all know how it goes.

Predictify.com

2008-01-16T00:13:00.000-08:00

My friend Josh told me about the above site and its pretty cool. You make predictions about many different things (ie Politics, Box Offices Grosses, Sports Scores) and for some of your correct predictions you can win a cash prize. This isn't fake, Josh has made over $100. Not every predicition has the possiblity of a cash prize, some you'll only be answering for your own enjoyment. I don't know who or what's bankrolling this site, most likely polling firms, but who cares. I like money. So check out the site, and have a good time.

PBR Takes Manhattan!

2008-01-10T10:41:00.000-08:00

Last weekend was the PBR Versus Invitational in Madison Square Garden. Seeing these cowboys from deep in the Heartland riding on the backs of some of the rankest bulls in Midtown Manhattan was exhilirating. As Reifer pointed out, these cowboys are from towns so small, its amazing that they are actually traveling to the big city. One rider, McKennon Wimberly, is from Cool, TX, population, according to the 2000 census, 162. Or 161 on PBR weekends since McKennon is out of town. Theres more people than that living in my apartment building!

A gigantic group travelled from my shul in Washington Heights to see the bull riding. Or rodeo as these city folk erroneously called it. This ain't a rodeo kids. Its PBR!

I went on Saturday night with a group of buddies for my friend Shosh's birthday (Happy Birthday Shosh!) and wore my best country garb. Tight jeans, boots, and my trusty cowboy hat. I had a good time teaching them the ropes. Shosh and I, who attended the event last year (and sat next to George Strait!) cheered widely as the major riders were introduced (Adriano Moraes! Justin McBride!!)

Reifer and I returned on Sunday for the final round. I got to watch my current favorite Mike Lee (only because my total fave Justin McBride is injured) ride all 5 bulls he was given maintaining his amazing season of zero buck offs. Very very impressive. We sat behind this awesome kid who was totally into it (picture above). She was cheering wildly after each good ride. She was sooo cute.

Well, I guess I'll have to wait til next year to catch the live event again. Although I'll be watching every weekend on Versus and on their PBR YouTube channel. Maybe I'll even trek out to the World Finals in Las Vegas in October. We shall see.

Things I Hate: Round 1

2008-01-10T10:25:00.000-08:00

I had thought I started this running tirade a long time ago. But I can't find it so I am starting anew. Round 1.

I hate the perky morning people in my office. They go around saying good morning to everyone all perkily. Come on man, at least wait until I've had my second cup of coffee. Especially if you are the lady who always expects a response to her "Good Morning". If I squeek out a "hi" she should find it sufficient. This morning one guy actually said, "Good Morning! Its a beautiful day!!" I nearly strangled him.

Tom Lantos

2008-01-02T12:14:00.000-08:00

Tom Lantos is awesome. I just got a JTA Breaking News update that he is to retire from the US House of Representatives. He is a Holocaust survivor and has been a huge advocate for Jewish rights while spending almost 30 years in Congress. He is currently the Chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee. I heard him speak when I interned in DC in 2001 and was impressed with his story and passion to work hard on some of the most important issues. The JTA release has him quoted as saying, "It is only in the United States that a penniless survivor of the Holocaust and a fighter in the anti-Nazi underground could have received an education, raised a family, and had the privilege of serving the last three decades of his life as a member of Congress. I will never be able to express fully my profoundly felt gratitude to this great country."

He is retiring because he is suffering from cancer. I wish him a Refuah Shleima, a speedy and complete recovery.

A Goldstone New Year's Eve

2008-01-02T11:36:00.000-08:00

My New Year's was pretty awesome. Party at Sharon and Devorah's was like their best one ever. I got to play Super Mario 3 while a little intoxicated which is always fun. We didn't bust out the DDR or karaoke like at previous #52 parties, but we had a sweet New Year's anyway.

A fun story is about how the senior Goldstones spent their evening. My parents have friends that come to LA every year from Detroit for the holidays so they always try to find something new and exciting to do each NYE. Someone said there was to be a big fabulous concert at the Walt Disney Concert Hall. So my mom bought tickets for them and their friends, all Detroiters in their 60s. Turns out the show was featuring Belinda Carlisle of 80's all girl band fame and the flaming Rufus Wainwright whos last album was a noted Judy Garland tribute. Let's just say my dad and the other fellows in their group were the only straight men in the audience. Plus, it was entirely in French! When I called them yesterday to find out how their night was and heard about the concert I was cracking up. My dad said that the show the couple was putting on in the seats to his left was far more entertaining than the one on stage. Good one Dad!

Bring on 2008!

2007- Comes and Goes

2007-12-31T09:09:00.000-08:00

As I sit here listening to All the Things That I've Done by the Killers as I write my end of year blog post I think the Killers' lyrics sum up 2007 pretty well.

Another head aches, another heart breaks
I am so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection, no no no no

Thats 2007 in a nutshell for me.

2007 was the year I discovered Spring Awakening, Veronica Mars and How I Met Your Mother, three things that make me extremely happy. Give me any one of those things (and a scotch and soda) and I'm a happy camper. I'm so easy to please. I became a registered Marriage Officiant (just like Barney Stinson, seen in the photo above) and have so far stopped three Orthodox couples from living in sin (in the eyes of the Federal Government, they were already halachically wed at the time of the civil ceremony). My bro Alan just became engaged to an awesome girl. But I think they're going to go the more traditional route and have her Rabbi cousin oversee the nuptials. Oh well, their loss. I am hysterical in my ridiculous clergymember role. Anyhoo, things are looking up on the Susanne front.

Whether you are in New York, California, Colorado, Israel or Thailand, I hope you all have a Happy, Healthy, Safe and Legen-Wait for It-Dary New Year! Love ya!

Unsafe Sex leads to baby?!! Noooooo.....

2007-12-19T11:02:00.000-08:00

I am pissed off at Jamie Lynn Spears. How dare she make Britney, the fodder of all my best jokes, look like the responsible sibling? Shame on you. Skank.

Jamie Lynn Spears, Britney's 16-year-old sister and star of the hit Nickelodeon TV show "Zoey 101" is pregnant.

JL was quoted by OK! Magazine saying "It was a shock for both of us, so unexpected. I was in complete and total shock and so was he."

In my current obsession Spring Awakening (and sorry for the spoiler kids) the main female character becomes pregnant. This was after she directly asked her mother where babies came from and her mother was too embarrassed to share with her the birds and the bees. All Wendla's mother told her was that to conceive you must be married and really love your husband. And then, voila, the baby comes. So when Wendla unknowingly conceives she tells her mom, but I'm not even married. Like Jamie Lynn, Wendla was also in shock. But seriously, did JL really not hear the news that sex leads to baby? Did mom Lynne Spears really not share with her daughter this crucial information? Better question, why hasn't Jamie Lynn seen Juno yet? Teenagers are no longer in the dark. This isn't 1890's Germany where Wendla was raised. If you get pregnant as a teenager nowadays, you don't have the right to be "in complete and total shock". Get a grip JL. You should have used a condom.

At least her sister Britney knew how to play the game. She swore to her legions of loyal pre-teen fans that she was a virgin at 16 because at least then she realized how impressionable these kids were. Or how lucrative her association with Disney was. Whichever. And this was while her boyfriend Justin Timberlake was beginning to tell a very different story. Of course everything since has gone downhill for trainwreck Britney. But at least back then, she knew what it meant to be a moral leader to pre-pubescents. I can't believe I'm saying this, but props to Britney. Next time make sure your kid sister is listening.

I'm taking bets for how quickly Jamie Lynn's hit Nickelodeon TV show will be off the air. They have already completed taping an entire additional season. Will it ever be aired? When will parents start picketing at Nickelodeon headquarters? Will there be room for them to picket alongside all the Writers Guild members? I give it one month.

*****UPDATE*****
Thanks to the Rabbi I share my corner office with this Newsweek article from October 2nd of this year was brought to me attention. It opens with: Jamie Lynn Spears wants to be known as a great actress—no drama, antics or tabloids involved. It then notes the trials of other tween celebrities like Miley Cyrus of "Hannah Montana" whom pregnancy rumors swirled around days earlier. They then do a Q & A about what its like to be a typical high school kid. They asked her specifically about Miley's "pregnancy scare" rumors and how the tabloids affect young celebs and she said "I stay out of that because I'm always at home; I don't go anywhere or do anything." Who knew? Immaculate Conception. Excelllent.

Jamie Lynn Speaks Out!!! 12/26/08

Props to John

2007-12-18T16:45:00.000-08:00

For those of you who read my initial post about my Presidential candidate favorites last April you would know that of all the Republicans in this great nation, the only one I would ever think of voting for is Senator John McCain. Yesterday he picked up major endorsements from the major newspapers in Iowa and New Hampshire as well as the coolest Orthodox Jew in national politics, Senator Joe Lieberman. If Lieberman's support can push all the undecideds in McCain's direction he might have a fighting chance or else one of the other Republican imbeciles will score the candidacy. This could shape up to be an interesting race after all. Not that any of them can beat my girl Hill. My dream tickets for the 2008 election are as follows. Drumroll please....
For the Dems: Hillary and Bill Richardson. For the GOP: McCain and Joe Lieberman. This country has been going downhill for the last 7 years. Hopefully some of these peeps can get us back on track. Peace.

Its a Chanukah Miracle...

2007-12-11T11:24:00.000-08:00

Nicole Richie chilling with some bochurim in LA. Thank goodness theres a picture on TMZ, otherwise I wouldn't have believed it.

Stay Wet!

2007-12-05T19:45:00.000-08:00

AKA Have a shot of your favorite liquor. Happy Repeal Day! December 5th, 1933 marked the end of the Prohibition. And in honor of that I want booze. Badly. But it will have to wait until work is over. Which leads me to another embarrassing Susanne story. Here goes:

Tonight I am going to a Chanukah party at my buddies' Ariela and Devorah's apartment. So I IMed Devorah to ask, "SusQHB: Will there be booze?". "Devorah: My boss is at my desk. What type of question is that?!" Whoops. Sorry Devorah!

Happy Chanukah

2007-12-05T08:44:00.000-08:00

Happy Chanukah to all my Jewish Peeps! To all my non-Jewish friends, Happy Wednesday!

This holiday season was chock full of miracles back in the day. I think we should all capitalize on the good vibes this time of year and take advantage of them. Do some good deeds. Volunteer for some charity. Donate a box of old clothes. And most importantly, tell your family and friends that you love them and think about them. Spread the good cheer to everyone around you.

Happy Holidays!

Susanne

See this movie...

2007-12-05T06:56:00.000-08:00

Juno was released TODAY in New York and Los Angeles. Go see this movie. Today if you can. If you're like me, you think teenage pregnancy is hysterical, but with the hysterical Ellen Page as the soon to be mother, Michael Cera (the tall blond dork in SuperBad, and I should add, a guest role on Veronica Mars) as the dad, and the incredibly versatile Jennifer Garner (I know, who knew) and Jason Bateman as the potential adoptive parents, you'll be rolling in the aisles. Seriously. LOVED this! Go see it.

***DISCLAIMER*** Before you picket my blog, keep in mind, I do not find teenage pregnancy funny in any way. Sometimes I can be a bit sarcastic. Sorry for that. This movie on the other hand, very funny. Go see it. Click here to buy tickets.

Spring Awakening Giveaway

2007-11-29T14:50:00.000-08:00

I posted on the Spring Awakening Fan Club message board that I have obtained one additional copy of the 2 full-page New York Times GAP ad featuring the entire original cast of Spring Awakening. I then went on to say that I am trying to find out a way to choose one lucky winner from the SA Fan Club. I have decided. There will be one trivia question. It is: Who bought me my Spring Awakening tickets for my birthday this year? The answer can be found somewhere on the World Wide Web. Those reading this post on my blog or in Facebook Notes are closer to finding the answer than they think...hint, hint. Send me a "Personal Message" on the Spring Awakening Fan Club site (my nickname is susqhb) and from the correct answers I will choose one winner. Good luck all!

Idiots in the News...

2007-11-16T14:07:00.000-08:00

OJ OJ OJ. What can I say? Dude, you are a bad criminal so find a new line of work. He was indicted this week on his burglary charge in Las Vegas. His response? "Its alright. I trust our nation's jury system". Well sure you do. They acquited you of a murder that you have since admitted to. I would trust the jury system too if I was able to get away with murder, literally.

Other idiots. I had this story in my newsfeed today: Robber shoots himself during home invasion. During the robbery, one of the robbers went to put his gun in his pants and the gun went off and he shot himself. IN HIS PANTS. I'm not going to ask question. I'm going to use my imagination as to the connotations of shooting yourself in the pants. If you are stupid enough to stick a gun into your pants with the safety off, don't carry a fricken gun.

Embarassed in the city

2007-11-16T13:07:00.000-08:00

Rarely do I have a life experience that is so embarrassing that I feel the need to write about it. But here goes...

So this week Tamar and I ran out to lunch and we had some time to kill so I suggested we go to Conway. Its bad enough that I shop there. Their clothes are kinda skanky and don't fit anyone over a size 4 but I still like to go there and pick up new tights every winter and shop for stuff from their store in the basement. Really cheap gifts, toys, toiletries, and food items. So Tamar was upstairs looking at their size 4 clothing items and I ran downstairs to see if they had any 99 cent boxes of cereal (I love Conway deals!). Tamar was hanging onto my credit card since my skirt didn't have a pocket. So before I went downstairs I reached into her purse and grabbed the card. I got down there, grabbed the cereal and went to pay. And I handed the non-English speaking cashier....Tamar's Baruch ID card. And she laughed at me. I apologized, asked her to hold on a sec and raced upstairs to get my credit card from Tamar to pay for my $5 worth of items. By the time I got downstairs apparently all the cashiers had heard the story and thought it was hysterical. To make matters worse, as Tamar and I were heading out of the store some babe who thought she was a security guard tried to make us show receipts. Oh, sure. Cause I really was at CONWAY to SHOPLIFT two pairs of $1.99 stockings and a box of 99 cent cereal. We asked her why she was checking receipts and I said, but you've never checked them before. She was all up in my grill and was like "Oh yeah! How long you been shopping here? We been doing this forever" How long have I been shopping at Conway? Thats a personal question. I don't think I want to admit that to another person. Especially this babe. Anyway, crisis averted. I'm adding Conway to my long list of NYC stores that I have been embarrassed in. Actually come to think of it, this was my second time making trouble at Conway. The first was when I brought a whole slew of Free Manischewitz manufacturer's coupons when I saw they were selling those gigantic bottles of grape juice. Those poor girls had never seen a coupon before. I had to explain to them how they worked. Anyway, Peace y'all.

Appropriate Mitch Quote

2007-11-15T09:21:00.000-08:00

Tamar and I just got back from J2. The dude behind the counter just gave me the smallest slice of pizza I have ever seen. Which reminds me of a story Mitch Hedberg told: "I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the f#$%er gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the f#$%er gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!"

Video Delay

2007-11-15T08:33:00.000-08:00

Sorry folks. My comedy video has not yet been uploaded. My computer is sick and is being fixed by my friend Adam. Keep waiting with baited breath. It will be posted as soon as possible. This is also sad because those of you who are my friends on Facebook are accustomed to see new Susanne pictures almost daily and I am a week behind. Soon soon.

Tonight's the night...

2007-11-08T12:50:00.000-08:00

Susanne doing stand up...Take 2. Topic: Becoming Frum and Being a BT. Pictures, stories, and video to follow. Wish me luck. I hope I don't blow.

The Day the Free Internet TV Died

2007-10-23T23:08:00.000-07:00

This is a low point in my life. TV Links is no more. Forget about Don McLean and the Day the Music Died. The deaths of Ritchie, Buddy, and the Big Bopper are nothing compared to the hole left by the now dead links to episodes of Veronica Mars, Weeds, and Macgyver. The Day the Free Internet TV Died had a much greater effect on my young life. PeekVid cannot take away the pain in my heart. Its British counterpart had far surpassed it.

RIP TV Links. You will be missed.

My root canal...and plans for the future

2007-10-09T08:11:00.000-07:00

Don't worry. No pictures here. Not that I didn't want to post any (I did) but I was too embarrassed to ask the dentist to take one or even ask to keep my old teeth (tooth fairies still exist if you believe in them and want extra cash). A lot more goes into this root canal thing than I thought. I figure one painful procedure and I'd be out of there and on my way. So when I got the quote of around two grand (thats after a HUGE discount that my awesome dentist generously offered my little insuranceless self) I was stunned. An hour of work with the drill and thats it?! No, its like intense. I just returned from my 4th visit. First time they began the root canal which Thank God got rid of my severe pain. The second time they finished that procedure and filled the teeth. The third they took a mold of the two teeth that were removed and put on temporary crowns. Holy crap, I didn't know I wouldn't be keeping my own teeth. That was sketch. I looked in the mirror and I swear it was a redneck hick smiling back at me. Spooky. Today I went back to have him put in my new permanent crowns. I feel like the Bionic Woman with my two new crime fighting teeth. So cool.

Note to self. Get dental insurance. Soon. My pledge for this year is to somehow secure dental. Theres two options for me in that respect. Get a new job. Or get married to a hot guy with dental. If you have referrals for either of these two fantastic options, I am wide open and waiting to hear your ideas. Hot husband is the preferred option.

Spring Awakening!

2007-09-22T20:24:00.000-07:00

I'm catching up after a busy week filled with Read Hebrew America calls, root canals, and two new teeth (I know, I'm like the Bionic Woman now, temporary crowns are cool). Last week I finally saw Spring Awakening. It was just as incredible as I imagined. Even more so actually. There is a lot of humor which is something you cannot tell listening to the soundtrack. I don't know if the people who wrote it had planned that but it was awesome. My brother Alan got me tickets for my birthday which rules cause its still super expensive to get seats. Afterwards we waited at the Stage Door and got to meet the whole cast which was mind blowing. They were all sooo nice and signed autographs and took pics with everyone who wanted. Most shows (especially those this popular) have casts filled with jerks. We chatted with the Tony winner John Gallagher Jr. who plays the tortured teen Moritz (seen above with Sara and I). He's soooo awesome. Now as I'm writing this I found a bloke on MySpace who posted a video of the show so um, I'm going to be watching that for the next few days I'm sure. My new obsession. Good times.

BREAKING NEWS! Key Food new sells Abba-Zaba!

2007-09-22T20:07:00.000-07:00

This is big I know. Everyone has that one kosher product that they love thats so hard to find that when they do see a store that sells it they buy a ton. I have two of those. Starbust Hard Candies (not even sure they make them anymore, sniff) which taste exactly like regular Starburst (after all, its the same artificial flavors in each) and I can't eat regular Starburst anymore after choosing this damn kosher way of life so these Orthodox Union sanctioned hard candies were the next best thing. My second item is Abba-Zaba! This delicious chewy taffy with a peanut butter center is like heaven on Earth all sealed up in a checkered black and yellow wrapper. It even has the additional hechsher sticker that these frummy companies feel compelled to add to their already kosher product. Abba-Zaba for example has a KSA parve emblem on the back of the wrapper, but some shmegeg at So-Yum Candies felt the obligation to frum it up with an added Star-K. The same way when you go to a kosher store theres a Paskesz sticker all over the bag of Twizzlers. What a waste of a sticker. Anyhoo, this candy is super yum and I think you'll like it too. For those who missed my birthday and still wanna give me a gift, feel free. I'm registered at Key Food. In the kosher aisle. Next to that Paskesz garbage.

I recommend any PB lover like myself run out and buy them today. But leave a couple in the store. My stockpile is running low.

Rosh Hashana Greetings

2007-09-11T11:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, heres the deal. I honestly feel as if no time has passed since last year and the last time I wrote this letter. Like its my birthday again in 6 days and I feel like my birthday party last year at Yogi's (which was lame and I was home by 11 pm) was just yesterday. Its gone by in a flash. I'm seeing little glimpses of this past year in my mind.

My mom being followed by 50 little children in Honduras because she made the mistake of giving one child a quarter and then they came out in droves.

Traveling abroad for the first time with friends to Madrid over Shavuous, and eating yontiff lunch in a Starbucks near the Prado because we were desperate to get out of the rain which plaugued us the whole trip.

Becoming an ordained "clergy member" and being able to officiate my first civil wedding ceremony.

My first root canal (which was this morning by the way and the drugs might be an explanation for this incoherant rambling).

Sure lots of stuff happened but I'm honestly not sure I bettered myself in any way. Rosh Hashana is a time for introspection. The flaws that I said last year I hoped to overcome are all still there. I still have a messy room. I still don't speak up when I know I should. I still "give it" but am incapable of "taking it" when it comes to constructive criticism. I miss my family terribly and can't believe I live 3000 miles away from them. Sure we fight like cats and dogs when we are all together, but honestly, distance does make the heart grow fonder. I hope that you can somehow find it in your heart to forgive me for for all of these transgressions that I have committed. May all of our relationships with our families, our friends, and our neighbors be built on a strong foundation made of love, respect, and mitzvos. I hope this coming year will be filled with nothing but simchas! Gmar Chasima Tova! Have a Happy and Sweet New Year!

Love,
Susanne

Top 10 Reasons to Quit Procrastinating

2007-09-11T11:06:00.000-07:00

1.

Saw that on a t-shirt. Ha.

Everyone Loves a Jewish Boy

2007-08-31T10:33:00.000-07:00

From JTA:

Beckham sidelined ahead of Israel game

Published: 08/31/2007

Beckham won’t bend it against Israel.

David Beckham, the Los Angeles Galaxy soccer star, won't join the England national team when it plays Israel in London next week in a qualifying game for Euro 2008.

The midfielder, famed for his ability to bend the trajectory of the soccer ball, was sidelined for six weeks after spraining his right knee in a collision Wednesday night when Galaxy played Pachuca, a Mexican team.

British media reported earlier this month that Beckham recently discovered that his mother is Jewish.

What the...?! Becks is JEWISH! OH. MY. GOD. He's mine ladies. Back off. Kenny Chesney, I am so over you.

Jew Walking

2007-08-27T11:57:00.000-07:00

The National Jewish Outreach Program (NJOP) took Simmy Kay of VH1 to the streets of NYC for some JewWalking! We've all seen clips of Jay Walking where Jay Leno takes to the streets of LA asking what people of normal intelligence would consider simple questions and people trip all over themselves trying to answer. One of my fave late night game shows was on when I was in college. I think we watched it every night at 12:30 am. It was called Street Smarts and it had a similar premise. Two contestants would have to wager whether or not the eccentric people on the street would get a correct answer to a specific question. It was awesome.

The folks Simmy encounters in this video aren't stupid or ignorant. They just haven't taken advantage of the opportunity to learn more about their Jewish Heritage. There was a counselor at Camp Gan Israel in Huntington Beach, California when I was like 15 years old who gave me one of the most important pieces of encouragement and inspiration that I could ever ask for. I remember this clearly. We were sitting in a dingy bowling alley in Los Alamitos and I was lamenting to her my frustration with my Jewish learning. All the other kids were earning incredible prizes in Tzivos Hashem (the brilliant Gan Israel learning program that give kids prizes for learning about Yiddishkeit). It was easy for the kids that grew up going to Jewish Day School. It came easy for them. They seemingly knew everything. And she told me something to the extent that just because I never learned something didn't make me stupid. I could always learn those things if I wanted to. That struck a chord in me. I remember she wrote me a note of encouragement at the end of the summmer and she repeated that phrase to me. I carried that letter in my wallet for several years. I believe wholeheartedly in this concept. What you don't know now can hurt you. We should all strive to do more. Be more.

I think a video like this can inspire people. Too many people are intimidated to sign up for a Hebrew class or a "Basic" Judaism class. Gosh, shouldn't they already know those basic fundamentals of their religion? But when they see that others are like them, they may be encouraged to take initiative. Instead of dropping your kids off at Sunday school and heading over to the gym, go into the synagogue yourself and take an adult ed class. Show your kids that you are as interested in your yiddishkeit as you tell them they should be. Otherwise, forward this video to your friends and family who you think will get a kick out of it. I sure did. My favorite line involves a bagel on a kid's head. You'll see. Its great. Check it out.

For those of you reading my blog on Facebook (the video embedding above doesn't work so) you can view the video on the NJOP website: http://www.njop.org/html/jewwalking.html

Things I Don't Understand

2007-08-24T13:52:00.000-07:00

I'm sure this is going to become a series of complaints and annoyances, but for now I felt it was a good time to rant about something thats been bubbling for a while. Why have I never been asked to be on a "Young Leadership" committee? I can't for the life of me figure this one out.

Ever since I was a kid, I have been a VERY social person. In junior high I had a lot of peripheral friends. Liked by all groups. Nerds, cool kids, smart kids, band geeks, you name it. Except for that one time this chick spit in my face in the 7th grade, but thats another story altogether. I don't know where that came from. She was probably jealous of my supreme coolness. In high school it was even more the case. I was Class Rep on the student council (my class had 400 students) and was nominated for Prom Queen. I like to say I was runner-up for Prom Queen since we didn't have a runner-up but I like to think I couldn't have been too many votes behind my friend Kim. At my Model UN awards the following week I was presented with an honorary crown because they thought I should have won. I campaigned for Class Clown at the Senior Awards but lost to Mel Nokes, probably one of the funniest people I'd met at that point, so I was okay with the loss. Besides, who campaigns for Class Clown? Nebbach.

In college my famousness escalated. I was on Student Council and proudly would stand on a chair in the caf making announcements about upcoming events and fundraisers. I was one of those people who everyone knew, even when I didn't know them from a hole in the wall. Even today. My friend Margie was hosting a comedy night in my shul. We expected 50 people to show. I decided to promote the event and we had about 200... during a blizzard. I'm sure it helped that I opened for the headliner, but still. I got people in the seats.

Why do I tell you this? Why do I boast in such a way? I get emails from people telling me about this fundraiser and this event. Usually this person is on the "event committee" and thats why they are encouraging their friends to attend. And everytime I think to myself, if I were on this committee, it would be a sell out. I may not always have the bucks to dole out for every single event, but I can do a lot of good for any organization that considers me a "young leader". This is officially the most full of myself thing I've ever written, but I was in the mood for a self esteem motivator. Thanks for obliging.

Why I Hate J Lo

2007-08-24T08:37:00.000-07:00

So I won tickets on Z100 for a private J Lo concert last night. Myself and three buddies excitedly entered the Roseland Ballroom expecting a good show. We were told to arrive at 7 and in addition to the concert it would be a private VIP party. So we and several hundred J Lo devotees lined up to get in promptly at 7. We got in and secured a good standing spot near the front next to the cordoned off VIP area. This was to my dismay, not for ZVIPs, Z100's promotional title for people who log on to their website, but actual legitimate VIPs. Damn them.

We got in there and DJ Spinbad was at his turntable playing a great mix of modern R&B while mixing in some rock and roll standards (unmistakable Jack & Diane by Mellencamp thrown in there to my fanatical cheers). I was dancing around like a crazy woman giving white people everywhere a severely bad name. Last time I "clubbed" was probably in high school, and more likely after a couple drinks. Here we were sober and beginning to get bored. In my head I thought, no worries, J Lo will go on by 8. After 8 another DJ (supposedly, J Lo's private DJ, does that mean he travels with her, spins records at J Lo and Marc's mansion? I have no clue). He proceeded to turn up the volume (literally, not figuratively) at least 100 decibels. And played really trashy (LOUD) rap music. Uh uh. J Lo would so not approve of this garbage. A true Fly Girl would never stoop that low. But don't worry Susanne, J Lo will for sure come out by 9. At 9 Carolina Bermudez from Elvis Duran and the Z Morning Zoo came out to huge applause. I'm a big fan of hers too so I got all excited. Even got my ass up off the ground where I had been situated most uncooly for the last half hour. She just did one of those, are you guys ready for J Lo?!! And we got all excited again. Then she left the stage and the loud DJ played on. No one there seemed to be having fun at this point. It had been more than two hours and everyone was standing facing the stage waiting for J Lo to come out. Maybe 1 in 10 people were still dancing. People started to leave. Tamarzeepoo left at a quarter to 10. Reifer, Nat, and I grabbed out bags at 10:05 ready to finally give up when J Lo finally made her appearance. I told the couple next to us, don't get too excited, shes going to do 2 songs, both from the new album so no one will be able to sing along and then she'll leave the stage. Sure enough, I was mostly right. She did two new songs we had never heard and one compilatation of her hits. Listen honey. You are a very talented girl, but you do not have enough hit songs to give devoted fans a compilation performance after they've stood around waiting for you for 3 hours!! You are no Tim McGraw! Even the Dixie Chicks don't pull that crap. We were super annoyed. We went home kinda pissed. Don't call your event a concert and just make it a dirty club scene. Nice Jewish Girls will not have a good time there!